After divorce, who should take the kids??

Well i dont have any experience of marriage or divorce but i will still express my thoughts here. I believe there should be no divorce at first hand. Its not good for the kids mental health and future. But if they do have to separate then the kid should be one to decide with whom he wants to stay. And the parents should still be friends after divorce to help raise the kid.

that would be hard for each of the person involved... but i guess each parent has a right to be with the kids.... but as a mom, i would want my kids to be with me, though their dad would always be welcome to hang out with them.... i just hope, this wouldn't happen to us... :)

That is really a very difficult situation to be in. And what is worse in this situation is that it is the children who suffer the most from this separation that happen. They become lost and disillusioned and many children do suffer heavily from this. When parents are separated legally I guess its the mother who has the rights to the children unless otherwise the father has valid reasons that he wants to take custody of the children.

Work it out in such a way that the children were affected as little as possible. In my case it would probably mean that the kids were with me on weekdays and that we would stay in the same area so that they don't have to change schools.

This is the very reason why I have hung on. We have our problems and have not yet separated because we are still trying to figure out what is best for the kids. Since I attend to all the kids needs, my husband has mention I keep the kids, but he has refused child support because he thinks it is my fault that I want out.

If i am in that situation I prefer to get my children with me. And I will get their father's financial support. I refer it first to my attorney if I have the right to take the custody of my kids as well as the father's financial support. Before hand I think it over and I have planned already if this was happen. But I pray to God not to happen. Oh my, i'm being sad.

It really depends on the situation as to if the children suffer and all situations are different. However in the most cases the children are left wondering what is happening to their world and why? As in the case of who gets the kids, alot of factors come into play. The best parent is normally the ones that the courts have the children full time, however the other parent almost always gets alot of visitation time unless they had abused the child or something. I dont believe it should just go to the one that is able to better care the child/children money wise either. The ones that I have heard of goes to the most caring, loving, stable person.

I am the child of a divorced couple. I have also been divorced. It is a hard situation for the kids. My parents didn't try to get along for the sake of the kids at all. They were too involved in their own anger to see how it was affecting us. I try very hard to get along with my ex. There isn't any reason for my kids to suffer from him and I not being able to get along. He and I are no longer together. The reasons to hate and bicker and fight are no longer there. They resulted from us being together. My ex may not see it all the same way I do, in fact, I know he doesn't. He doesn't mind arguing with me, and letting the kids know of his distaste for me. I try to keep it civil at least. As far as where the kids should live, that should be determined by the parents. A lot of things should be taken in to consideration. It is a hard situation for everyone. Unfortunately, it happens a lot. I think it is best to learn from the mistakes of our parents and take it from there.

I do agree with you that kids are the one whose sufferings from a broken family. It has a long term effect on them psychologically and socially. If parents got divorced, I think it is best to let the child choose on whom he/she wants to be with and if a child can't choose between the two, give the child to the one who is more responsible and willing to devote more time. Children from broken families need all the love and attention they can get and if they won't be able to provide it, surely the child will go astray.

Divorce? I wish that will never happen to me? I'm glad I've been enjoying a happy marriage for the last 23 years and by God's grace this is gonna be for life! It's the children more than anyone else whose going to suffer so I really am anti-divorce. However, if irreconcilable, and divorce is the only option left then I believe the parents should for the sake of their children make peace and be friends once and for all. I believe the mother (if capable both phyically and mentally) should take the children expecialy if they are still at very early age. Only a mother can give the love and care children need. Now if the children are old enough, I believe they should be given the choice where would they wanna stay with.

I am not a pro-divorce person. I really think that relationships should be saved in order to raise your children better. I think the kids suffer the most in this situation. They get bothered by the relationship of their parents and may affect them in different ways. Married people should be more responsible and committed to the relationship. They decided to get marry and so they must be fully aware of what it entails. Marriage is a vow that should be kept.

If I were in a situation where my parents need to go their separate ways then I would go to the one whom I'm closer with, that's my mom. Every child of the right age should have the right to choose whom they want to be with and go with. But in case children are still minor, then lawyers should be the ones to decide on the matter. Children right of choice should not be impaired or hindered.

When a man is not living up to his responsibilities as a man,when such separation occurs it would be better for the woman to care for the children because most marriages break down as a result of inadequate provision for the family by the man.

It's so sa d tho think of divorce specially when the kids are just young to understand everything that happens to their parents.They are the ones who suffered the most and parents don't care how they feel. Well for me i think that kids under 7 years oof age should always have the mothers custody and for age above that it's for the child to choose whether he/she wants to stay with.And as for the parents always make sure that you don't talk ill about your ex's with your children, always remain civil to each other so that children s respect for their parents is always there.

hope all the couples knows how to handle if ever they are in the difficult situation coz it is normal to the couple to have an argument or to have a problem in the family but they need to consider the affect of it,espicially the children and hope they find a away that they must stay together and find their heart that their still a love in their heart. I WILL save my marriage for my children and husband and wife must talk about it and most espicially i will go back when the time of our courtship or the time that we are happy together what is our vows. where did we meet what is the thing we did. all the happiest moment to refresh our mind that their is love that bind us.

hello im single,, but i've encounter here in our province that mostly mother will take the kids..

I agree, divorce is a difficult situation for kids. They usually find themselves as victims of the seperation, and some may think that it's their fault their parents don't like each other anymore, but of course this isn't true. Kids have to deal with the additional pressure of living with only one parent if their parents stop living together, and may have limits on the amount of time they could spend with their mum or dad during a week. The one who should take the kids should be the more reponsible parent and the one who's able to provide a better living for the child. You can't make a generalization on this, because in some cases, the father is more responsible, and in others, the mother is. Sometimes both the mother and the father will have to share custody of the child. If you're asking how I would react in such a situation, I honestly don't know. =S Divorce isn't a good thing, but in some cases, marriges simply can't work out.

I think it seriously depends on the parents themselves and the individual situation. My ex and I were never married, but we did break up after having a child together. I took our daughter because he's irresponsible. He fought me in court over it, but then ended up dropping off the face of the earth for over 4 months. But I also know some fathers who are much better parents then the mothers are. Most of the time the mother will win out in court though.

kewl divorce is really a bad condition for both husband and wife...as well as their childrens...this situation ruins the whole life of both hubby and his wife....in my views after this situation kids should be kept by one who love them very much without any intension ....so that the care of kids will be best...and this will safe the childhood of the kids...

Extremely worse thing to happen to a child.. The person who can give the child a better life should take care of the child.. In most cases the mother can take care of the child better but if the mother cannot manage the expense of the child's education and so on then may be it might be a better option to hand the child to the father..