Do you give advices to your friends?
By JannaLee
@JannaLee (660)
Philippines
November 20, 2008 2:12pm CST
I've always had good or should I say great friends. People whom I trust and share my thoughts with. Sometimes they ask my opinions or my advices regarding certain things, and it's quite difficult to give one. First, I'm not the one in the situation and I haven't even experienced other problems that they did encounter. Second, I know that my opinion somehow counts...and I want them to rely on their own instincts...^^ So I tend to show them the options and ask them to pick upon it...^^ not giving advices directly...^^ How about you?
6 people like this
22 responses
@classicool123 (8)
• United States
20 Nov 08
Typically with friends who ask advice often, they seem to be open minded and earnest/ eager to hear my response. so i just let them know what all the options they can take and the consequences, or perhaps benefits, of each one. It's always good to know you were able to have a little input in somebody else's life, even when you may not live close to them. . .
1 person likes this
@rgarman (3)
• United States
20 Nov 08
I believe that truthfullness is the only way. I think you can be truthful to your friends and deliver the message to them in a nice way. You don't want to lie to yoru friends - give them advice that they only want to hear - because then you are not truly being their friend.
1 person likes this
@mtdewgurl74 (18151)
• United States
22 Jan 09
That is the best bet since if they think that things went wrong you can't be blamed for the advice you gave that backfired. So that is what to do in situations like that. It is also best as you say to make them rely on their own instincts so that they will be more able to handle a situation should it ever arise again.
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
21 Nov 08
H[i]i Janna,
My friends will always approch me and wants to talk to me about their problem, I listen most of the time and listen to what their different ways in solving it and from that, I will open up my ideas and suggestions and we will discuss about it! It's always a 2 way process![/i]
@1corner (744)
• Canada
21 Nov 08
When asked, I do, if I have any. When not asked, sometimes I still give it, if I deem it important and helpful. I've no strict rules about it.
@connieconstance (134)
• China
21 Nov 08
I would give advices to my friends.If my friends want to seek advice from me ,I think they trust me,are in trouble now,and desire some help. So no matter whether my advice would be useful for them, I would try my best.Of course,I just tell them what I think and what would I do in that situation, and I won't make the decision for them,that them should make by themselves.
@Agathacoco (336)
• China
21 Nov 08
I like to share my opinon with my friends ,when they have problem,they aslo like to tell me the problems they meet in life .It make us feel more relax when someting happened ,you may feel that there are someone who always stand behind you
@frinces (433)
• Philippines
21 Nov 08
Yes, if they ask to. My friends realize that I am a good adviser once they have found out that my advice is the best. I don't give an advice that is pleasing to their ear but the advice that would help them solve their problem. Just like a medicine. It doesn't taste good but it can heal illness.
@visa2wealth (82)
• India
21 Nov 08
I do. But i will give advice to people either friend or relative only when they came and ask for advice. Otherwise i dont.
@sanjo0679 (225)
• United States
21 Nov 08
If one of my friends ask my advice, I generally offer it. I simply put it, "If it were me, I'd .....". Whether they take my advice or not is strictly up to them. I'm a pretty good judge of character and know my friends quite well and have learned their way of thinking, on the most part. There's been plenty of times when I've heard one of them say, "I wished I'd taken your advice".
@mods196621 (3652)
• Philippines
21 Nov 08
First I study the situation carefully asking more question how is that happened from that information i surely know how to handle their problems. I give them advices according to their situation, if it is too heavy I could tell them to go to much well experienced people or go to priest/pastor or guidance councilor. But if it is easy to handle and I had experienced it I could give them answer as I can. Trying to explain the consequences. And little by little teach them the way as they can easily understand the problem. The cause of and where it come from how it will begin.
@zoeyren (26)
• China
21 Nov 08
I also have some really great friends. They usually give me useful advice when I'm in trouble.And i'm asked for my opinion for their problems, I will put myself in his place.Then I give several possible choices and the advantages and disadvantages of each choice.Well, the final decision is up to himself.OK,that's it. Happy day!
@alyssa_c (440)
• Philippines
21 Nov 08
Many times have my friends run to me for help, or just to cry out their problems or whatever dilemmas they are in. Whenever they ask me for ways on how to solve their predicaments, I try to work around it by asking them what they think they should do, or their ideas on how to go about solving it. Like you, I don't give advices directly; rather, I put it in a way that they'll think they were the ones who had thought of the solution themselves. Sure, I put in some of my suggestions sometimes, but only when they run out of words. That way, not only have I helped them about the problem, I have also lifted their spirits somehow.
@carmelsuarez (329)
• Philippines
21 Nov 08
I do love giving advice to my friends or I would rather say that my friends sought out for my opinion in one thing or another. I just love it knowing of all the bad things I did, somehow I made right.
@pooh08 (671)
• Vietnam
21 Nov 08
I don't give the advices when I am not in that situation or had experience. If I don't have any experience, and I give my advices to some people who want me advice them and it isn't true, I will be unbelievable from myself and others. It's opposite with my conscience.
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
21 Nov 08
I've always talked to my friends about certain things. And if a friend needs some good advice, I've always been willing to give some to them. But I only give advices if I know that It will be for the better. If I know I can't give some I will be willing to be a good listener. Keep myLotting. HUGZ!!!
@akangirl (2436)
• India
21 Nov 08
Dear in real life i haven't got any good friends, just my cousin and my sister can be called my true friends. These days my cousin so busy that she rarely gets time to meet me so i feel bit lonely but here i have lots of friend who are very helping and i trust them very much. I dont know why i meet good people on web only.I wish my school days when i had so many friends and we all were very close. but they have shifted, some got married. Being lonely feels like being hollow. Now i have stopped going outside
@RMK819 (2)
• United States
21 Nov 08
My friends always come to me for advice and I am always willingly to give them my heartfelt advice. I look at it this way if they knew the solution they wouldn't care what other people thought. When you are looking for advice you are trying to find the best solution and by asking the people who love you the most you know you are getting honest, trustworthy advice. I always talk out the problem with them, gather all the information I need to make a good decision and then we discusss the outcomes of my suggestions to their problem. Just remember your friends are there for you through the good and the bad.