Do you still DEPEND on your PARENTS?even if you already have a FAMILY?

We are totally different, I earn my education fee when I was in the colleage, and I am now living alone in a city far away from home. I miss home so much. It has been really a long time since the last time I taste good food that cooked by my mother. I am too independent, financially. And whenver my mother called me, she would ask me when will I go home, I could not answer her because I don't know. And you said when your child growing old enough, you would try to leave your parents. But my opinion is, you would hurt them by doing so. They may be too old, and they need you to be there and take care of them, just like they take care of you now. I think it is not right always thinking about leaving parents, no matter what the reason is. All parents like their kids around them, and together with them. Best regards,

Hello my dear andak2007 Ji, From your discussion, I am just making out that you hint at financial support, but when i think about dependency betweel parens and children, it is a vast subject, today at 64 yrs of my age, I might be having lot of independency myself economically, but where would i go with my wrinkles on my face and support physically to take me to hospital. Exactly in similar way, i wish to express taht even if children are self dependents on financials, for other support they may look at their parents for elderly advise because of their experiences. may god Bless you. have great time.

I'm still single but my two oldest sisters do just that. Although one of them is divorced with a kid so I don't really blame her, but the other one.. she has EVERYTHING she would ever need for decent living; a good husband, good income, even a freakin house for crying out loud, and now even though they already have two kids she's STILL clinging onto my parents like dust on clothes! and cuz of that her and her entire family are around here 24/7, making it majorly difficult for us to live in peace. Not only she strains my dad's pocket so much that us -the ones who still need to be looked after- can't get anything we actually need, she also always makes my mom watch over her kid(s) when she goes off sleeping or going out all the time. wth!! I really really REALLy feel sick from someone like that, she's already a thirty year old grown woman but she's acting more childish than even me, and the constant havoc her kids cause around the house makes it very difficult for me to sleep and study; cuz she always sends them downstairs so she can sleep up! (my room is downstairs) I didn't mean to go on blaspheming her but I'm 10001% reaching my limit, and my parents are too much of goodie-doers to say anything about it, we could be living a much easier life if she just acted like a grown woman for once -w- jeez phew, that sure let out a lot of steam! w

My mom helps me alot with my kids even though I am an adult. Really I think that this is one of the reasons that we have families in the first place, to be able to help each other. This has probably been going on since the beginning of time. Cheer up! =)

did you ever stop to think that maybe your parents love having you there because they can still feel like you need them? after kids are grown and out of the house parents start thinking they aren't needed anymore.we all need that sense of being needed and loved. lets face it, no one is always good at being on their own. even at 48 i will always depend on my parents for one thing or another. they want it that way

do you feel ashamed of it? I was educated that children are indepentent when they're 18 years old in western countries.my mom told me only in a civilized society,an individual is depending on himself ,he should earn for his studing fee and the daily expenses.there's no denying thant we should strive for the living ,it's not proper to ask our parent's help endlessly.

hi andak! well, in a way, yes. we live with my in-laws. though my hubby and i have work, we don't have our own home. we live with them and we just give a little contribution to the expenses, and sometimes we buy food for the family. i dunno when this will end, but so far, so good. i don't have problems here. i am thankful to have good in laws who take care of me. take care and God bless you!

You are not the only one my dear. My mom never stop supporting me and my siblings in time of real needs. But I am very lucky to have a 'well off' mom whom I can look up in difficult times. When we got married she immediately gave us land to build our own house and lately her land was developed into a housing estate and she give each of her 10 children 2 units of double storey houses. I am not ashamed to receive something from my mom even though I am already married. It is a blessing to have a mom who never tire of looking after the welfare of her children.

I have a family of my own and I mainly depend on myself economically. But I need help from my family sometimes and they are a good help to me whenever I need it. We don't live with my parents, but live in a house of our own. Back home during the summer vacation and winter vocation, we go to visit our parents and give them some money to buy whatever they wish to. We also buy them something to wear from online shops. Take care, andak.

My husband and I both left our parents houses the day after we got married. You never know what hand life is going to deal you though. Any of us at any time could end up needing help, and when you have kids you gotta do what you gotta do, to keep a roof over their head even if it means staying with someone else for a short while. I think as long as your parents don't mind and you are kind and respectful of your parents and their home, and you have a plan in place for your future that it is OK to do temporarily I have known a lot of people that have had to do that for a little while to get back on their feet. Just make sure you stay on track to stand on your own as soon as possible. Don't get in to any debt, and save what ever you can.

I don't have a family now but I am saving up for the future. My parents have done their part in raising me and I don't want to be a burden with them. I can live with them even if I have my own family but surely, I will never let myself be dependent to my parents. No matter how hard it is, I'll find ways to earn a living for my family.

Don't despair friend, sooner or later I know you can fulfill your wish! Certainly it is every good mother's wish to build a family separated and not dependent on anyone. But with 3 unplanned kids and no good job, it is really tough to go independent yet. You are quite blessed because you seem to have supportive parents. Imagine how those people who have none are living miserably on their own...deprived and not housed comfortably. But you, you have parents who accommodated your family and for that you should be happy. And much more... the mere fact that you have the desire and the drive to do something to improve your living, I am very, very sure you won't be forever dependent on your parents. Yes, just wait and give time for your youngest to grow more. Only you can give the best nurture to him and your other children. When given proper caring, teaching and discipline, those 3 unplanned kids will someday give you the happiness every mother desires so just oncentrate on them for the time being. When time is ripe...then go and find a job so that your family can start living on your own.

When you are starting a new family it is very hard especially when both of you do not have a stable job.Yes I agree with you that it is quite common but you should not make it as an excuse.Do not join that association of people who make themselves a big burden to your family.If you are an independent person then,why not make it now. I was 21 when I started my own family.I also lived with my parents for a while but not for so long.I know how hard it is.But I can say I was successful because after two years we have our own home renting at first.But after a few years we were able to build our own house.It is very hard,but if you are determined,you can't go wrong.

just before i got married i also live with my parents but now that i'm married i choose to find our own place. my perception is that i don't want my parents or my in law get in the way when i and my husband have misunderstanding i want to discuss it just between the two of us. but in your case since its difficult for you to separate i don't think it's bad, because parents are always there to help us they don't want to see us struggling. but ofcourse when the time comes that you already can stand on your own and got a good job don't forget to give credit to your parents.

after getting married I decided to live independently with my wife at that time although I have to stay very small rented house, and I began to try to save money, and now I already have their own home

Nope, the time i got married automatically i have to raise my family by my self, it is very awkward to depend on your parents. But there are some traditions that, parents insisting their married son or daughter to stay with them, for the reason that they don't want to be alone, the fact that they are getting older.

It is really really hard to be on your own with small children these days. My oldest daughter is married and has 2 kids and she does amazingly well. I am very proud of her & her husband because I know how hard it is. I have 2 other grown daughters that are single and they bounce back home from time to time to get back on their feet. It is tough. I am older and still have a teen at home and I struggle. I don't think you should feel bad. I'm sure your parents are happy to help where they can. That's what families do...stick together. I don't mind when my girls move back to me....it's kind of nice having them here. I'm sure your parents feel the same.

I do still live with my parents, but my situation is slightly different. I am attending college and have a part time just, so I would not be able to survive on my own, without there support and guidence. I have a few more years then I can go on my own, well not really, I will move in with my boyfriend, who is moving out of his house when he finishes school as well.

Me and my husband still living with his parents. I don't ask help with my parents anymore because I had a job and my husband as well. I'm a fulltime mom and a full time husband. I work as a call center agent at morning and night. My day off is 3 days so Spend it wisely to my family especially to my daughter. You can make it girl. If I can you can do it also. their so many ways to earn money. Don't say unplanned babies because your hurting yourself. Thats what you want you made those 3 babies with love. Right? You better have a family planning. Consult an Obstetrician for that. Good Luck.

it depends to u..im also living with my mom even im married..i dont know why but maybe bcoz my dad married 2 and my mom feel lonely when my dad sleep at another house..so i live with her just to share her lonely and she can play with my daughter too..to be frenzz..