How do you deal with a depressed member of your family?
By TessWhite
@TessWhite (3146)
United States
November 28, 2008 11:20am CST
My son recently went thru a fairly nasty divorce - not one he wanted. Yesterday he spent his first holiday without family and seemed to do ok. You see I currently live three states away from my son, but talked to him yesterday evening. Then in the middle of the night he called, he had been drinking, and he was talking about suicide. I don't even have an address for him since he moved recently. So I couldn't send police. But luckily my son's ex wife called the police and they went to check on him. I just got off the phone with my son's dad (my ex) and neither of us knows what to do for him. He refuses to take his antidepressants and he refuses to seek help or counseling. I'm at a total loss here on what if anything I can do. So I'm asking all of you - what would you do if your only child was considering suicide and you were too far away to help? Have you ever been in this situation and if so how did you deal with it?
1 person likes this
8 responses
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
1 Dec 08
From someone who has dealt with serious depression and such in my life due to some things from my past, I know how Bad depression can be especially when far away from family, and feeling like no one cares. Somehow he needs to realize that there are better things out there in life than this, and the only thing he needs now is to learn how to cope with this, take meds if he needs too, and find people he can talk too to help encourage him as well. It is not always easy, but at least he did call and reach out and ask for help. I will be lifting up your Son in thought and Prayer believing for something Great to come from this situation as well.
@cupkitties (7421)
• United States
29 Nov 08
well speaking as someone who has suffered depression I would say be there for them, be supportive. Above all do not tell them stupid things like "get over it". Its not something you just turn off and on. They need you to be there and to listen to them, not punish them for feeling how they do.
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
18 Dec 08
[i]Hi Tess,
I am very behind on this post and hoping he feels a little bit better not since I can just imagine it's not easy for him...
I don't know anyone who experienced the same but hopefully, he has friends to hang out with so that he can divert his attention...
That is really very hard for you since you are far from him...Just talk to him all the time, give encouragement and know his whereabouts![/i]
@oyenkai (4394)
• Philippines
30 Dec 08
Well I don't have a kid and even if I did I could never say "I know exactly what you're going through" but I have a vague idea (I posted a sort of similar discussion yesterday about a guy who can't get over a girl). What I saw was how his family handled the situation, his parents spoke with his siblings so that they'd try to exert more effort in letting him have his way because he's in a tough situation and that they should all try to understand.
Thanks for the comment on my discussion!
@rajeshank (253)
• India
22 Dec 08
First i use to take them to some outing and make them feel comfortable...then i start to ask there problem and give clear solution for it..and make them feel comfortable and get out of these false thought on there idea and make them feel good..thats really tough to handle them..but in the way we speak...we can change easily..:)
@prinzess1515 (1341)
• United States
29 Nov 08
If he is a danger to himself then you don't need his approval to get him help. You can have him be put into a mental hospital.
@dozhou (326)
• United States
28 Nov 08
What I can do is to listen carefully. I am lucky, at least, my wife talks a lot when she is depressed. I just sit there and keep silent. Of course, you should look at her to make her know that you are listening to her.
