Have You Ever Wondered?
By pretty_babe
@pretty_babe (704)
New Zealand
November 28, 2008 4:09pm CST
Hey MyLot Friends and Members.
Have You ever wondered why people find it soooo hard to deal with losing a loved one they really loved or wondered what all the fuss was about?
Or
Have You Ever thought that you knew what it was like to lose a loved one and told someone to just "Get Over It"?
I did wonder before my Dad's passing why people found losing someone so close to them so hard and wondered what all the fuss was about and thought to myself about telling them to just "get over it" but i am glad I did not say it cos it would have only come back on me when Dad had gone and I would have been more upset. I know what it feels like and I know how it feels so I can say I DO know how it feels to lose someone as close as a Dad I have known and loved for a lot of my own life.
Catch ya later
pretty_babe
3 people like this
10 responses
@lagirl1966 (709)
• United States
29 Nov 08
I lost my dad in 2005. So it is still kind of recent for me and I guess I still grieve sometimes. What bothers me is, the way most people forget that they ever existed. People and loved ones just stop talking about them and never mention them again. That really bothers me. My dad was part of my life for 39 years and I loved him very much. He worked his but of for his family and no one ever appreciated him. But I did. Now, my mom and my youngest brother won't even talk about him. They say they hate him. It is kind of complecated. But I know my older brother dosent feel that way. I don't think you ever really "get over it" that is, if you really have a heart anyway.
@pretty_babe (704)
• New Zealand
14 Jan 09
Hi lagirl966,
I know what you mean cos I am sure there's people that don't care either.
My Dad's name seems like dirt sometimes too, that really sucks too cos I am trying to help myself and help the others too.
Thanks lagirl966 for your response too.
Catch ya later
pretty_babe
@lagirl1966 (709)
• United States
15 Jan 09
thanks for your response pretty_babe. I agree with you totally. Maybe someday people will change.
@celticeagle (168542)
• Boise, Idaho
29 Nov 08
I truly believe that until you have walked in the shoes of those who have experienced grief you do not understand the deep emotion that is involved. Nor do you understand the steps that a person goes through. It is riding reality in most realistic terms. 'Just get over' it is a cruel thing to say to anyone under any circumstances. Catch ya later.
@pretty_babe (704)
• New Zealand
14 Jan 09
Hi celticagle.
Thanks for your response.
I agree with the whole lot of things you said there. I am glad that some people need to look in their own backyard so to speak.
Catch ya later
pretty_babe
@munhozmib (3836)
• Sao Paulo, Brazil
29 Nov 08
Hello, pretty_babe.
I have to say that it must be pretty hard to lose someone you love. You never expect it to happen, but it just does. I, myself, have never lost anybody loved. I believe I am lucky.
Even though it is something hard, we must start accepting loss and get on with our lives. It is not going to help if you stop living just because you lost someone loved. You must do what you can to keep yourself happy and make the lost person proud of you.
Respectfully,
Munhozmib.
@pretty_babe (704)
• New Zealand
14 Jan 09
Hey there munhozmib
It is hard to lose someone I know it is hard and how hard it is. It is harder if you lose them if you have not moved from the same house as they lived in though. It is easy enough to say to carry on but if you had lost someone would you know how to carry on? I am sure you would find it hard just like me, but maybe a bit less hard. Thanks for your response all the same.
Catch ya later
pretty_babe
@MizzLadyB08 (1174)
• United States
29 Nov 08
I do not wonder because I know how it feels to lose a love one. I lost an aunt this past summer and it was very difficult because it happen so fast and no one expected it. I will never tell someone to "get over it" because it is disrespectful and hurtful. To this day I am still dealing with the lost of my aunt and deep down it still hurts me. I also lost my dad when I was 13 and I still kind of sit and thnk about how things will be. I am sorry to hear about your father. Anyone one who is rude to the ones that grieve must not know how it feels or maybe they just do not care.
@pretty_babe (704)
• New Zealand
9 Jan 09
Hi there MizzLadyBo8.
Thanks for your response.
I'll get back later on this.
Catch ya later
pretty_babe
@pretty_babe (704)
• New Zealand
14 Jan 09
Hi ammu007.
Thanks for your response. I know you don't think so but I am sure there is a way, it's just a difficult thing to do. I don't know the miracle answer so I can't say it is easy and stuff.
Catch ya later.
pretty_babe
@burnek (101)
• Philippines
29 Nov 08
Well, There you have it my friend, You just answered your question. For some people it just takes a little more time to get over it. But eventually they will. I hope that by this time you have learned to accept it because your dad is in god's hands now and I'm sure he doesn't want you to hold on to your hurt feelings and probably just want you to go on with your normal life. Don't you think so? Cheer up pretty_babe! Kind Regards :)
@pretty_babe (704)
• New Zealand
16 Jan 09
Hi burnek,
Thanks for your response. It takes longer than 2 months to get over something like this and to even get used to it. I thought I had learned to accept it but going away just wrecked it all cos I was in a Dad alive environment and then the other day I came home and had to go see a Dr and then in a shop I said something without thinking and then re-connected that Dad was gone, purely accidental saying it too or I think it was a pure accident anyway. Thanks again for your response.
Catch ya later
pretty_babe
@loveyoohbaby (737)
• New Zealand
29 Nov 08
Hey there I now what you are going through I wondered what all the fuss was untill I lost my father
Arohnui Love loveyoohbaby xoxo@pretty_babe (704)
• New Zealand
2 Dec 08
Hi loveyoohbaby.
I didn't know either. I thought I knew what it was like just from losing those others who have gone before Dad. Love You too.
Catch ya later
pretty_babe
@lvaldean (1612)
• United States
29 Nov 08
No I can honestly say that it has never crossed my mind to tell someone to simply get over it. That is truly heartless and cold.
Each of us grieve in our own way and for some it takes longer than others. Some of us are public and some very private in our grief. For those of us who have lost someone close to us, whether it is is a family member or a dearly loved friend our grief is real and very personally felt. All I can say is that we can only hope that those left behind will have empathy and care for our wounded hearts and will give us the space to heal and the shoulder to cry on when we need it.
But no, get over it would never be something that would cross my mind.
I am very sorry for your loss. I can't tell if it is recent but either way it is sad and you have my sympathy.
@pretty_babe (704)
• New Zealand
9 Jan 09
Hi Ivaldean.
Thanks for your response. I will get back to you at a later date.
Thanks for your help.
Catch ya later
pretty_babe
@pretty_babe (704)
• New Zealand
2 Dec 08
Hi scyzyyyy.
Thanks for your response
It is a difficult subject I agree. It certainly has to be cos we are human anyway so I guess it's just the way it is and there's not a thing we can do about it.
Catch ya later
pretty_babe
@smiley83 (1534)
• Malaysia
29 Nov 08
hey,
i'm so sorry for your dad..
well, losing someone dearly love is so difficult and requires lots of patience, whether that person is passed away or a breakup with a lover, or whatsoever the reason could be... at any case, it is just tough...
hoping things will get better with you pretty_babe ^_*
smiley,
@pretty_babe (704)
• New Zealand
2 Dec 08
Hey smiley83.
Thanks for your response.
I can't think of anything to say sorry other than Thanks for the response. If I think of something later then I'm sure I will send a personal message to your mylot message center rather than a group message.
Thanks again for your response.
Catch ya later
pretty_babe
