No tissue but a pig's tongue and mouth...hahaha

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I went to a trip somewhere in a native place here in the philippines. I didn't have a shet for 5 days already so I think I was going to explode. There was no cr there in that native place where native people lives. So they told me to go in a pig's pen. They gave me a stick to shoo away the pig if ever they get near me. So, I went to the pig pen and take a shet. I forgot to buy a tissue and there is nowhere to get one. So someone suggested to let the pig lick my butt instead hehehe.....he said it will also feel good... So I followed his advice and let the pig lick my butt, it's true- it feels great like having a massage hehehe.... after which someone came and gave me a a tabo with a pail of water and soap. I had a nice trip here in kiangan. The scenery here is all in green mountains and beautiful rivers. Fresh air with wild birds, dogs, cows, chicken and even monkeys or owls.