The sure fire way to get a bum a job.....
By LuvBr0wn13s
@LuvBr0wn13s (765)
United States
December 5, 2008 6:53pm CST
My 3 stepsons are interesting to say the least. One in articular is giving me pause. He has been fired from every job he has had (all in the fast food/food service industry) and seems to think that in each case it was someone else's fault. He dropeed out of school, so he hasn't goetten his HS Diploma or GED. Several family members have tried to help get him involved in programs to get his Diploma/GED and after 2 years he STILL hasn't finished one. Ihe gives the impression that he is waiting for someone to knock on his door and offer to pay him tons of cash to play Guitar Hero and sleep. I have suggested that he try to join the military and have gotten the shrug accompanied with the non-committal grunt. He is quickly running out of family that he can live with, because (as I have tried to impress upon him) no one is going to help him do nothing. Unfortunately I got involved in this young man's life after he had been brainwashed with the idea that those guys in the slacker-movies where only one dude works and the rest bum off of him was his great aspiritation in life. Does anyone know of a way that I can motivate this young man to get involved with his own life?
6 responses
@harlydudesn (16)
• United States
6 Dec 08
Hi,
It sounds like he could have a low thyroid function. My nephew who moved in with us about 9 months had the same problem. He was 18 years old. We took him to our doctor to have it checked out. Sure enough he had a low thyroid, low adrenal function and low vitamin D level. Since he had everything checked his is much better. If you have his thyroid levels check, please make sure that the doctor checks the TSH level, T4, and the T3. Insist on all these levels being checked.
Also as far as the adrenals, he could have been born with low adrenal function.
I hope this helps.
@hibiscus_mel (719)
• United States
6 Dec 08
That sounds interesting.I didn't know being lazy has a connection with that. Thanks for the info shared.;-)
@kuzzon1960 (118)
• United States
6 Dec 08
well, i know it may sound silly , but there are people who actually make money from video games. first, find out if he has interests in computers and how well he knows his video games. does he draw well and is he good with graffics? if he has these qualities, he may be able to get a job designing video games for gaming companies.ask him questions. he may be feeling the "nobody cares for me anymore so why should i care for myself," phase.try the interests thing . if that doesn't work then kick him out and tell him he's on his own. sometimes tough love is the only way.
@LuvBr0wn13s (765)
• United States
6 Dec 08
No, it doesn't sound silly at all. I have spoken with him about his interest in video games to see if that would be a career path he could pursue. No, such luck. I have told him that I don't care if he wants to be a circus clown. I just want to see him motivated enough to take an interest in making something--anything out of his life. I suppose he may have to endure being truly homeless before he does something.
@katemeow (847)
• Singapore
6 Dec 08
i have a lot of friends who are bums too and i know its really none of my business but i feel bad for the parents who continue to take care of them until now (all my friends still live with their parents) I have one friend in particular that i would like to help because i feel that he is really smart but not motivated. he has never gotten a job ever and he is now 26 years old! he graduated college a few years back and still acts as if he is in school! he spends all his time playing online games and has lost so much weight due to lack of exercise and sleep. he comes out only when his mom calls him for lunch or dinner.i am really scared that he might collapse soon or just be anti social forever :( i am also looking for a way to motivate him. will be looking at the answers on this discussion :)
@savak03 (6684)
• United States
6 Dec 08
I assume that he is living with you. Also, from the context of your post I'm guessing that he is at least 18. Unfortunately, as long as there is someone, be it family or friends, who will put a roof over his head and provide his meals he will not be motivated to provide for himself.
While it may sound hard hearted, it might do him some good to have to live on the streets for awhile. It's called tough love and it will be harder on you than on him. When he finds out how uncomfortable it is to not have the means to support yourself he may get his act together.
@savak03 (6684)
• United States
6 Dec 08
I assume that he is living with you. Also, I'm guessing that he is at least 18 from the facts you did give. As parents it is natural that we want to see our children succeed. Sometimes that means we have to step out of the picture and let them fail.
As long as there is someone, be it relative or friend that will put a roof over his head and feed him he will not be motivated to provide for himself. While it may sound cold hearted you may need to let him live on the streets for awhile. It's called tough love and it will be harder on you than it will on him, but sometimes that's what it takes to get them to understand.
@LuvBr0wn13s (765)
• United States
6 Dec 08
No, he doesn't live with us any longer. Each time he did live with us he left because he didn't want us controlling his life. He lived with his Uncle, and after losing his job and breaking house rules his Uncle asked him to leave. He is living with an older brother currently and I suppose he has what he wants. No one is expecting anything from him, but no one is giving him anything either. I hate to see him giving up on himself like this.
@gazinglady30 (75)
• United States
23 Apr 12
I just remembered something that happened to my bro-in-law as I was reading your post. There was this dirty but physically strong homeless man, begging for money on the parking lot of store. when he tapped on our car window, my bro-in-law asked him that if he wants, he can give him a job instead of him living in the streets like that forever. The man asked how much he will be paid. $8 bucks an hour, which complies to the minimum wage in our state. He looked stunned as if he had heard the craziest thing in his life. Ten bucks an hour!?? I earn more than that on the streets!
So we left puzzled and smiling at his statement. No wonder, there are lots of hobos on the streets, despite all the charities and programs all this world can offer. Sad but true.
