When do you know you relation ship is over?

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When can you tell when your relationship with your significant other is over. when you break up how do you know if you are over that person or just missing them? I am just asking because i broke up with my babies mom about 3 months ago and until two weeks ago i was fine, you could have ask me if i would get back with her and i was 100% sure, then two weeks ago i started hearing songs on the radio that made me think of her, i started missing her in a way, when i get my daughter from her it makes me think about her even more. I have even been dreaming about her the last two weeks. I have thought about telling her i love her still on the phone but didnt want to shock her, so i wrote her a letter about 5 hours ago on myspace...she still hasnt responded. So i was wondering a couple things if i did the right thing by telling her how i felt and am i just missing her because in my heart it feels like i still love her not miss her?