A small wedding??
By Denise_Tung
@Denise_Tung (647)
China
December 7, 2008 9:26pm CST
I think I can really call 2008 marriage year. So many ppl I know get married in this year and I've heard and seen so much of their weddings. I am really tired, heehee. You know, the pre-wedding photos, the long long guest list and invitations and the ceremony...
Thinking of this process makes me feel so reluctant to get married. Though I've never married before, I want my wedding to be a very simple one. Just some close friends and family gather together in the church and then we give each other promise before the priest and then we are men and women! And then we have our honeymoon in some place we've wanted to go for so long.
I don't know why I am thinking like this, but I am just not feel like a fancy big wedding. I guess that is ok, huh?
How about your wedding like? And if you haven't had any yet, how would you like it to be? Share your thoughs, please. Thanks.
6 people like this
24 responses
@spalladino (17891)
• United States
8 Dec 08
Your wedding day is you and your future husband's special day so it can be anything you want it to be. The first time I got married I had a big wedding with a big reception and it was a big pain in the butt. My husband and I couldn't wait to get out of that hall and meet up with our friends for some more informal celebration. When I married my current husband it wasn't the first time for either one of us...I was divorced and he was a widower. We wanted a small family wedding which is exactly what we planned. We were married in his brother's side yard, standing under a beautiful flowering tree that had been their mother's favorite. We invited only our family and a few friends and my husband's brother & his wife cooked a bunch of food (we live in Florida) on the grill and ordered the side dishes from a local restaurant. It was a great day...we had a great time...and so did everyone else.
@Denise_Tung (647)
• China
8 Dec 08
Hey spalladino. That's what I hear, lol, a big wedding. But I feel relieved that you have an intimate one after and then it's so great. I think that's what I want. Everybody will be happy and feel comfortable on that special day and then they can give their truely wishes to us.
How beautiful is your wedding. Standing under a beautiful flowering tree! How romantic and I love it. I am gonna plan a wedding like that, lol. Thanks for your response.
@AmbiePam (92518)
• United States
9 Dec 08
I've not been married before, but if I do get married I want it to be simple. I'm not into big events with a lot of attention given to them. My sister was married two years ago, and by contrast her wedding was huge! She had seven attendants, as her husband had seven groomsmen. It was such a big event, but it only made me tired.
1 person likes this
@1corner (744)
• Canada
8 Dec 08
Hi Denise,
It doesn't matter whether you go for a huge wedding or a small one. What matters is that it's meaningful for you and your groom-to-be. Where money is not a concern, some want to have an elaborate one so they can share that day with family and friends. Others however think a small intimate wedding is better. Do whatever is acceptable to you both. You'll still be married regardless.
So, will wedding bells be ringing for you soon?
1 person likes this
@Denise_Tung (647)
• China
9 Dec 08
Hi 1corner, nice to hear from you! But sorry to say, no, the wedding is not coming yet. Currently my bf is still working abroad and I am working on our new house. Buying a house is not an easy thing here in my country, lol, but we've prepared financially. And as soon as the new house is decorated, the wedding bell rings, haha, keep you posted.
@camomom (7535)
• United States
8 Dec 08
I had the big fancy expensive wedding the first time around. It wasn't worth it. It was a waste of money. We also had a big long reception. The expensive long honeymoon. I was more about showing off for teh friends and family and not about us.
This time we are planning something short and sweet with few guests. Then a average sized reception and maybe a night or 2 for a honeymoon. No wasted money. Just about us and no showing off.
1 person likes this
@Denise_Tung (647)
• China
9 Dec 08
Hey camomom. Yeah, what we need is a simple but classic wedding, lol.
@jlamela (4898)
• Philippines
9 Dec 08
Me, too I don't like big wedding with so many fancy details. Some of my friends' wedding are really grand complete with sooooo many sponsors, guests and a website detailing their event as if it was the most breathtaking happening to take place on earth. Well, to some people they maybe love preparing for a grand, big wedding because they argue that we have to get married only once in our lifetime.
But my idea of weddings is always be simple. I just want to have a simple ceremony with closest relatives. In fact I don't like hotel receptions, it's so silly, I prefer a mountain resort reception with just 30 people invited. The expenses of a grand wedding is not practical anymore. It is best to put the money into business for a good future and besides most couple who planned a big wedding are buried in debts which is a bad start for a married life. But to some people who can really afford and work hard to have a big celebration then why not.
1 person likes this
@Denise_Tung (647)
• China
10 Dec 08
Aha, sometimes making things too high profile gives extra pressure, like last time I changed my job and then I invited so many friends together to celebrate and then things don't turn out perfectly as I have immagined. So I am looking for something small but intimate, heehee. And then I can really enjoy it, rather than force myself for some routines.
@magicmanscos (16)
• Philippines
8 Dec 08
If you believe 2008 is a marriage year then consider 2010 the divorce year... :)... Getting married in a jiff would result to a relationship without its primary ingredient, Love... Without love a relationship can never withstand challenges more than two years... Trust me, I live next to a divorce lawyer.... ehhehe..
1 person likes this
@Denise_Tung (647)
• China
9 Dec 08
Abosutely right there. So I am not getting married in this year not in a jiff either. Lol, I am just thinking of the wedding that finally it will come. You know more about divorce and thanks to your neighborhood, heehee.
@riyasam (16556)
• India
8 Dec 08
i know getting married by following all the customs(rituals)is indeed a tedious one.that is why i advised my younger sis to have a registered marraige.i remember during my wedding reception,my cheeks were paining from smiling to about 1000 guests.
@Denise_Tung (647)
• China
8 Dec 08
Ha, I know the pain of smiling, lol. And your younger sister will be saved from the pain, lol. Thanks for responding.
@kaka135 (14931)
• Malaysia
9 Dec 08
I had my wedding ceremony and dinner in year 2008 too and many of my friends got married in this year also. I always wanted to simple wedding, it'll be nice if we just register, that's it.
To prepare for a wedding, time and money are really spent. My parents are quite traditional, and this is the first wedding in both of our families, so we have to invite quite a number of relatives and friends to our wedding. In the morning, we always have the wedding ceremony, where we need to give tea to the elders, to show our respects. This is our tradition. Actually more things have to be prepared before the actual wedding day.
Luckily I was quite happy on that day, especially there were so many friends and relatives attending my wedding, I was really glad to see them. ^_^
@sacmom (14192)
• United States
8 Dec 08
My wedding was so small, other than the country clerk (who married us) and witness (who worked there), it was just my husband and I. That's how small it was! I don't think a wedding can get any smaller than that as there needs to be the bride and groom, the person performing the ceremony, and a witness. It was nice though. Other than forgetting the camera, I love that my husband and I eloped! It certainly saved on the expense and hassle of a traditional wedding, that's for sure!
@Denise_Tung (647)
• China
8 Dec 08
Hey sacmom. It's very nice to hear that you had a such samll but happy wedding. It's also what I want, samll, but warm and only the loved ones, isn't so wonderful?
@kun2349 (23381)
• Singapore
8 Dec 08
Yeah, 2008 seems to be a good year for marriage, because many of my cousins had gotten married in this yr.. lol =D it's almost like one wedding every 2 months.. hehe ^_^
U got a mistake here, it's man and wife, not men and woman.. hehe ^_^ CHurch wedding is always simple and yet romantic, but i have not been to one before.. hehe ^_^ Though some weddings are simple, but they can hold alot of meaning to it, and also can be grand in some ways too ^_^
So far, i dun have any wedding plans yet because i still wanna explore and see more of the world.. haha
@Denise_Tung (647)
• China
8 Dec 08
Hi Kun. You are so careful, lol. I am just typing the wrong thing all the time and thanks for your correcting. You think church wedding is romantic? Ha, that's what in my mind as well, cheers!
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
8 Dec 08
I think you are very wise to want a small, intimate wedding. After all, your family and close friends are what matters, not all the aunts and uncles and cousins and stuff.
My wedding was in the back yard of the house we were living in. I got my dress from a thrift store for $4, he put on his suit and we invited two couples we were very fond of as witnesses. It was a nice wedding. The next day we had a party for all our friends (well, his friends, I didn't have many-never have and probably never will) and it was so much fun! I think we probably spent a total of $200 on it and everyone said it was the best "reception" they'd ever been to.
1 person likes this
@Denise_Tung (647)
• China
8 Dec 08
I am so happy to read your response!!! You are more than wise and I admire you. So, I am gonna have a samll wedding, though I am not sure of the date, I am sure it's gonna be small. Small, but nice and valuable. Thanks so much for sharing. I am getting more guts, lol.
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
4 Mar 09
I don't think either my fiance nor I thought much about what we wanted our wedding to be like before we met. However, I do think that what I myself had thought about was just a simple wedding as well. I didn't much think about it though, so I can't say I thought about the grandeur of what the television depicts for weddings. My fiance, actually, hadn't thought about it himself. My fiance and I are having a frugal DIY themed wedding, and our guest list is going to be small. Instead of having a honeymoon we are going to most likely wait and save the money so that we can go to Texas. However, if we end up going to Texas before the wedding, then we might not even have a honeymoon, unless ofcourse we go to a local hotel. We're both homebodies in the sense that unless we are with other people, we don't stay at a vacation spot for long.
1 person likes this
@Denise_Tung (647)
• China
8 Dec 08
Wowo, Anne, you really give me some guts! At least someone is having the same idea as mine and has actually done it, and guess what? It's so great, lol. Thanks for sharing!!
@savypat (20216)
• United States
8 Dec 08
My daughter dreamed and saved for her own big wedding, we could only give her so much so she worked very hard for the wedding she wanted, and I must admit it was beautiful but the marriage only lasted a few years and then it was gone. Not my idea of a great way to spend your money, I think your way is better.
1 person likes this
@Denise_Tung (647)
• China
8 Dec 08
Thanks for your encouragement savypat. I think we are saving time on the wedding and then we can have more time to love each other, lol.
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
9 Dec 08
You wedding should be just the way you want it, it doesn't matter what somebody else wants for theirs this is your day and plan it the way you feel like doing it.
1 person likes this
@ratyz5 (7808)
• Philippines
9 Dec 08
If I were to get married with a woman that I really love, I would do my best to give her a wedding that is really grand. I mean, it only happens once for her, unless she separates from me and gets married with another man, which I wouldn't like to happen at all.
Of course, even if I could provide a very extravagant wedding for her, if she insists to make it simple, maybe we could agree on something half-way. Simple and extravagant.
1 person likes this
@nini89 (670)
• India
8 Dec 08
My marriage was 20 years before and the marriage was with all ceremonies and all filled with guests and relatives. There were so much crowd, all were served with cold drinks and lunch. It waas a good marriage party. Happy mylotting and have a good day.
@bellebads (740)
• Philippines
8 Dec 08
my wedding was a simple wedding. i invited only a few people like my family, relatives and closest friends only. but it was fun and everybody enjoyed the experience. we rented the whole beach resort and stay there overnight with my family and some relatives from different places in the country.
@jha2x_09 (74)
• Philippines
8 Dec 08
hi denise
I just got married this year,but, its very simple wedding,because only both families is invited,believe it or not,only 50 people invited on my wedding. My invitation card is very simple,i made my own invitation card and my gowns made by my husbands grandmother.I dont have wedding planner or even wedding coordinator.
YOU know,it will up to you,if you want to have a simple wedding,cause for me my aim is to save money,since now a days,you have to be practical in many ways..
If you can make it simple but elegant,why not? right?
The important is you love each other and you'll have a happy life..
My wedding is very simple but memorable and happy..
@Denise_Tung (647)
• China
9 Dec 08
Hi jha2x. So nice that you have such a simple but memorable wedding. I can immagine it must be very intimate and a happy one. Once again I am encouraged coz I have always hold that in my mind about a intimate wedding. Cheers!!
@eclecticeducation (112)
• United States
8 Dec 08
I had more of a medium size wedding. You need to do what you are comfortable with. After the wedding, I really realized how silly it was to get all worked up over it. It better to just relax and enjoy it (but that is hard to do!!! ;) )! I hope you have a wonderful wedding! :)
1 person likes this