Freestyle -- what do you think.. feedback?

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Hi all, Just wrote this verse a bit ago and thought of posting it here and would like to know what you're thinking and if you could give me any feedback. Thanks! Here it is: Life won't visit, you have to approach it If you barely make it, you need a coach s**t I'm a Kinesthetic learner, a honest money earner "Mo money, mo problems", no money, sink further Don't wanna experience? Life will get harder If you won't even try nothing then why bother No pain, no gain so don't try then don't complain Use your brain and get certificated to obain You can't rewind life and take possibilities again All these cheap tips are for you to keep Just don't forget: Still Waters Run Deep