want a happy married life?

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People say Marriages are made in Heaven. If that is so then why are we getting married on earth? The fact is that you and only you can make your marriage life either hell or heaven. Everybody dreams of having a life partner who would be caring, loving, understanding and an emotional support at times of need. But how many really manage to get a life partner of their dreams? The fact is 70- 80 marriages fail that is they dont even cross 10 years of existence and the one which do survive of them 98% of married men and women are unhappy. Just barely tolerating each other. Why? Please share your views