I give up being nice.

You can't control the behavior of other people but you can control your reaction to their behavior. Please don't stop being nice, polite and friendly. Don't stoop to their level. Kill them with kindness. Trust me. You will irritate them more by not reacting in the way that they expect you to. Besides, niceness may not have worked with this group of people but at the most difficult times of my life, I could not have gone on without the kindness that others extended to me. Just my two cents.

I hate when people do that. What is the point in talking behind someones back. I try to never do that because I know how it would feel if someone did that to me. I would just ignore these people from now on. They are not worth your time ans energy. You might be surprised at how the react to this. They might even apologize. Well I wish you the best of luck in this situation.

No but I'd be done with them too! Still you could do one last act of kindness. Give them a stick remover? You know, to remove the ones up their a$$es?

ohh a lot of people are like that... my daughter tells me that one of her classmates is like that, she tries to act like a friend but when someone is not there, she backstabs them by saying a lot of bad things about that person... my girl just try to stay away from that person. but that person always want to be with my daughter and her friends, so they just let her and at times, they do tell her about her attitude, but it doesn't help her change... so my daughter and her friends just try to ignore her when she's going with them.

yeap...has happened to me too. So,the first thing to do was to let them know that I overheard them and be a little bit sarcastic. I was polite as always and gave them no sign of anger. I still remember their expression. They must have felt really stupid. Since that day never spoke to them again. Not because I dont want to but I can see that they feel uncomfortable with me...

Yeah, I agree with Liisa, that to be nice should be coming from the heart...Its okay that they said those nasty things about you inspite of your kindness but I hope those shallow actions should not lead you to stop being kind other wise it iwas not coming from your heart. Kindness is a gift, Not all people has and You should feel bless if you have that gift. Spread it then.

Well, there are many people like that, even though you are nice to them, but they may not really treat you as friend. I don't know if this happened to me before, or I just didn't hear my friends talking about it in front of me. I do know some people talk bad about me on certain acts, but I don't really care about them, as long as I think I'm not doing anything wrong. Every one has his rights to do things, especially it's not harmful to anyone. So, I usually will ignore them, and pretend I don't know they are talking bad about me. I'll still be myself. If I want to be a nice guy, I'll still be, regardless what they said. I'm living for myself, but not for others.

That has happened to everyone at some point in their life I think. Its like other posters have said, and what my mother always told me, kill them with kindness. Just because they are mean and miserable doesn't mean we have to be mean and miserable back. Even though it is very tempting!

this happened to me as well. Well the thing that runs in my head all the time is that i have friends who know who i really am. i was really very sad. i also gave up being nice in the sense that i stopped being "plastic" or trying to be kind to people who are not dear to me. I am only kind to those who are kind as well Now, im just neutral about meeting new people. anyway, i forgot about these people and what they did to me by not being around them and by not paying attention to anything that has to do with them. that's all we understand your situation from kukai. http://kcatwoman.blogspot.com

These sound like very mean people - really unkind. You shouldn't waste your kindness or time on them further. If I were to overhear them talking about me, I would confront them, let them know that I'm aware of their remarks. And then drop them from my list of friends (and warn others, too about their mean behavior).

oh yeah i got the lady next to me, i tried to be nice to her, but she's always got an attuide and talk somewhat nasty too. the last i said hi to her she was well what you going to do about this branch???? i was polite and asked what branch and went to look.. then i smile at her, well that is oak, i have a maple tree. go luck with the branch.. she would get nasty to people who would park long ways by my driveway, and they are'n blocking her driveway so now we just don't say anything to her, and waiting for her to complain about how we park just so i can tell call the cops.. my one friend when he see her he make remarks like "there the tractor tailor lady" i wouldn't worry about them too much, and i wouldn't let them stress you out.. they are just rude and A HOLES

yes friend it happened to me. bottom line is you cant please anybody. if you heard badmouth about you just ignore them. continue being nice. at the end of the day they will feed up saying bad words about you and they will stop. most people are just like that you show them kindness they say something you show them rudiness they will say something too. if i were you just smile at them. though its hard but you try to do reverse psychology. you will see.

If they cross the line, I think you should show them whose boss or just ignore them. If you always seem to be desperate, I find the more they will talk behind your back. If they were true friends, they wouldn't talk bad behind your back in my opinion.

Don't be affected it's their opinion. Give them their happiness... :) As long as your action don't hurt people, just stay cool. :)If you act bad, still people can say something about you, if you'd changed just because of what you'd heard from them, you just let other people win!

Don't be mean to them just ignore them. Don't go near them. Everyone has the right to hate someone for whatever reason but they don't have the right to disrespect and mistreat anyone.

It has never happened to me but I don't blame you for being hurt. Some people just feel the need to talk about other people like that because it makes them feel better about themselves. I'd stop going out of my way to be friendly although I would always be polite. You should absolutely tell them that you over heard them and that it hurt your feelings. I wonder how good they would feel about themselves then.

I too hate it when people act like that. I have had a few people that treated me like that and I just completely seperated myself from them. I can't stand the way some people are. But there really isn't much that you can do because they are always going to be like that no matter what.

You should not give up being nice. Actually BEING NICE should come from Your heart, and that would mean: NO INSULTS would ever stop You from being nice. If You are nice just because You hope to receive the same attention from others: then it probably is not TRUE nice-being. I am neutral person. Used to be nice, but...probably it did not come from my deepest heart, so NOW I am just being neutral.

Take that criticisms as a way of improving yourself.Remember,you cannot please everybody.Doing nice things to others are secretly rewarded by God.It is not easy to be good,but its cool to be good.