what to do??????

Wow!!! Talk about having a mess on your hands. First, there are a few questions. How old is this girl? Is the father helping support his off spring? Has she applied for welfare? With a month old infant she is eligible. She also is eligible for WIC and other benefits. The three of you need to sit down and have a discussion. I agree with your husband that the girl needs to be out of your home, but you can't just toss her in the street. Set up a target date for her to be out on her own. I am pretty sure that she can get on welfare within about 60 days. She was old enough to get pregnant, she is now old enough to pull up her socks and get her own place. SHE needs to haul her butt down to the local welfare office and apply. SHE needs to figure out where she can afford to live, SHE needs to become responsible for that child. If she cannot do this, then she really needs to place the child with a family that can take care of it properly. Obviously she isn't caring for the child properly since it's only a month old and it already has a bad case of diaper rash. Before your husband comes home you sit this person down and tell her that there will be a group discussion about her situation and that she needs to realize that she has to be out of your home and on her own within a specified amount of time. Then lay down the law that she cannot use your bathroom. Also inform her that she is a guest in your home and that she doesn't have exclusive rights or possession to anything in your home. I would also inform her that if she cannot be civil to your family and obey the rules set down in the home, she is more than welcome to leave. Also present her with a bill for the fifteen dollars, that money was for you to spend on you, not to spend on someone else's baby. Also, realize that there are shelters that the girl can go to, including woman's' shelters that will help her get on her feet. She isn't going to do this as long as you are allowing her to stay in your home. This isn't teaching her self reliance or survival skills. It is teaching her how to use people. I speak from experience, as I had my daughter and her family land on me three different times. The first time was for three weeks, the second time for seven months and this final time was for nine months. They wiped me out financially and emotionally. I figure that in the thirteen years that they have been married they have lived on their own about two years. Otherwise they have either lived with his mother or with me. They don't know about survival or doing what it takes to live. Give her an eviction date and stick to it. I know it's hard as a mother to do this, especially since the baby is so small. But you also need to place your family and your husband first. I realize that the "Mother" part of you doesn't want to do this because of the infant, but the rational adult needs to survey the situation and realize that your husband is right. After all, he wouldn't be making this demand if things haven't gotten to the point of being intolerable for him. There just comes a time that you need to shove the birds out of the nest and let them fly on their own.

I agree with your husband. I feel bad for the infant, but the girl is self-destructive. Her family probably had legitimate reasons for putting her out. She will never learn if someone always steps in and saves her. Your husband and your family is of primary importance. She needs to figure her life out on her own since she has no appreciation for someone helping her.