My teenage cousin`s letter

That is very emotional and it might a serious problem besides "regular" teenage angst. Don't think I'm very fit to give psychological advice but I would carefully ask what exact rules she is so unhappy about. Pretty possible somebody has to explain to her why you choose to do things this way and what the consequences might be.

Your teenage cousin sounds depressingly angry. I would not hesitate to have someone in the family that is closest to her to spend some quality time with her. Give her time to express her feelings, good and bad. With the idea of having a conversation with her, on her level and with interest and open ears. Ask her if she would like advice or just someone to talk to. This teenager is truthfully expressing the picture through her own eyes. How she came to see things this way is unknown as the post is somewhat vague. However, it does sound like she is not at all impressed with those who the letter was directed towards. Those people could gently and kindly confront her and ask her why she feels the way she does but without finger pointing, blaming, causing an argument and no yelling. This could be as simple as something that in two to five years she will look back on and laugh with embarrassment or it could be a sign of something more serious. It is hard to distinguish without knowing a bit more background. As it is presented I would first try and find someone who is closest to her, that is a family member and spend some quality time with her. Expect nothing in return and even don't expect or ask her to talk about this letter. Over time, it may be an hour or it may be days, she will confide in them. If this is something that is seriously bothering her, she will talk about it voluntarily. If she doesn't, then maybe after a day or two, bring it up and respect what she has to say as I am almost positive she will be expressing the truth of how she feels. Once she reveals the possible reasons as to why she is feeling the way she is, compelling her to express her feelings as such in the letter, maybe the family can regroup and find a mutual solution so that the teenager can have a reason to have more respect for those that she obviously is taking a non liking to. I wouldn't just brush this off and leave it for some time in the future she may again express her added dislike in a more extreme way.

I think that the best thing to do is to try to give this person as much attention as she wants as it sounds to me that in her opinion no one hears what she has to say, and she feels as if what she says is nothing to the adults but bull hockey. Sounds as if she feels that everyone is following the same rules and has no room for suggestions.

To actually write a letter and have you read it and to have addressed it to more than one adult took a lot of emotion and a lot of courage. I believe she is greatly moved and that she has to be enlightened. If you know the root of her out burst then I believe you also know within you how to fix it and to either make her understand...or if your conscience has spoken, then to change your ways. I know how it feels to not be heard, I'm still quite young and is not yet an "adult" in the eyes of my parents (even though they say I am, I know they don't think it). So I honestly hope you the best. Thanks for the comment on my discussion.

Without knowing your cousin it is hard to know how to take the letter. Was the letter just out of the blue or is this something you'd expect from your cousin? It is probably a good thing that your cousin is trying to talk to the "adults" and not just keep it inside. Good luck to you and the other adults.

I have did such actions before. She is going to against some rules she doesn't like. And she wants your understanding and support. At that time, I was sad as I was destroyed by the test I didn't like very much. I felt very tired. But on the contrary, my family members couldn't understand me. They just kept asking me to study hard and ignored my unhappiness. So it's better that you should have a talk with her or reply her letter. You should be patient enough to discover what she is thinking about. But don't interupt her thought rudely. It will hurt her feelings and indignity.

I would just talk to her. See what's bothering her, because something is. Don't wory too much, though. Really, it seems like normal teenage behavior to me. When you're a teen everything seems so unfair. I'm 21 and looking back, I did some really stupid things as a teenager for no reason. Being a teen there's a lot of confusion and hormones.