I have been "unfriended" here on Mylot..... should I be honored or offended????

Honestly I don't know whether to laugh or cry, but at the same time I think you should feel honoured. This is a discussion forum and we are all entitled to our opinions which we should be able to post. If we do not fully comprehend something in a discussion, then asking for clarification is what we should be able to do as far as I am concerned. The only other alternative is to not give a response at all but if a subject interests us, then generally we do want to be able to give a considered opinion. Certainly if someone posts something that is abusive and/or threatening, then we can choose to "unfriend" them, or should that be "defriend"? lol Also if someone only starts discussions that have no interest to us, then we can decide to delete them from our list. I have not been in that situation and that might be because before accepting someone as a friend I check out the discussions they have started as well as responses made. If there is enough to interest me in those 2 areas, then I will accept the friend request but if not, then I let it go. There have been some members who removed me from their list of friends. At the time I was not at all active on myLot and they might have thought I had left so it was not an issue at all. I have no idea though if anyone has removed me as a friend for any other reason though. There have been discussions that I have responded to where I have not agreed with the topic starter and my response has reflected that. However that has not affected the friendship side of things at all. If a friend cannot accept that I will not always agree with their point of view and gives me a negative rating as a result I am not sure that I would want them as a friend anyway. If fact from memory the myLot guidelines say that we should not give another member a negative rating simple because they disagree with our opinion. What a boring old world it would be if we always agreed on every subject. Good luck to you wheel and I am quite sure that you have been honoured in this instance. lol

I have occasionally "defriended" someone, or refused repeated requests to be added, not because of differences of opinion so much as a complete difference of attitude and belief system. I also defriend them more often for the fact that they either don't respond to any of my discussions, and/or I find their discussions totally uninteresting. But I'm with you, I would wear a "defriending" for a difference of opinion as a badge of honour. Lash

Maybe you should feel hnoured because of the reaction that you received. It may be an indcation there are people who read your postings? I may have experienced something similar. Maybe it was a coincidence but after responding with a slightly viewpoint to several friends' postings. After that I did not receive any more notifications even though they were still doing it. I think people who cut off links with their friends because of differences in opinions were not looking for friends. They were looking for supporters or yes-men. If the same thing happens to me I will not be offended but I will be disappointed because we are supposed to be together, support each other, instead of focusing on "I". all the best, rosdimy

It had never crossed my mind that someone would remove you as their friend if you didn't agree with everything they said. That is absurd. Maybe they were just looking for a reason to remove you. I wouldn't love any sleep over it myself! If they are that easily upset, then I would not want to be on their friends' list.

I think it is just sad. Of course I don't know which discussion you were referring to but if the discussion was unclear why wouldn't the writer want to clarify it? Maybe the writer was offended that you didn't understand or maybe they felt threatened by your question.

If I got into a heated row with someone then I would be honoured to be removed of their friends list. If it was just for a difference of opinion then I think I might get offended as that is what discussions are all about on here. I have had two heated discussions on MyLot to date but I just backed off and did not even give those friends negative ratings as I think sometimes the next day I would regret this. Well at least you know who your true friends are now and I suppose you should now be honoured as they are not worth bothering with.

Just as in real life, people on the internet have no class sometimes. I'm a pretty easy-going type and it would take a lot for me to "unfriend" someone, even though I have. I don't take offense at it, even though by the guidelines you've stated, a few of my friends could have unfreinded me!

don,t feel back people going to do what they like to do it would be my honor to be your friend.don,t worry about it it,s going to be ok. i know i probably have offended alot of people but not intently iam just responding to what they are saying are asking.i don,t focus on my stars because i know who iam and iam not a bad person an neither are you so don,t worry it,s going to be ok.to agree is to disagree is my matotoe.welcome to mylot and have a happy ne year.

sorry to hear that but of course it hurts a bit since all you want is to make some friends. i actually don't know if i had experienced that, coz i just don't mind it. and you can't please everyone. just hang on there, if they don't appriciate your opinion just say thanks anyways. happy posting

I've been unfriended too, but usually it's a day or so before I realize it and then with my fibro fog, I often don't remember who it was who disappeared. So...if he/she was trying to make a statement, it didn't work.

I was actually told once that I was going to be "unfriended" (Like the word, by the way). I was joking back and forth with someone rather obliviously. When I could tell that he did not get my humor I apologized several times in the chat and finally I was ......alas!......."unfriended" anyway!It's sad, but life goes on. It's just like real life. We can't make everyone happy and some people just do not have a sense of humor.

hmm i dont add everyone who requests me i mean i only add ppl who have interesting threads n i dont thnk its a big deal happy lotting and have a blessed new year

If you are befriended then find out for yourself why and some times ignoring is good people will turn around and will be your friend again. Sometimes it happens so now you know next time watch what you are writing.

I know how you feel, my rating just jump down 2 levels. The different is, I do not know who give me the negative rating. But, I just take it easy. This is how life supposed to be, positive always partnering with negative, ups and downs, love and hate............. This is life which make our world colorful. BR.b

I only have less than 5 good friends on mylot people that are always there when I need advice and share the same interest if these people delete me as friends I will be disappointed the rest of people on my friends list are acquaintances to me they might be real nice people and we have fun sometimes but if they delete me it would not hurt me or excite me in anyway I can't please everybody and I don't want to

I think your right, not everyone is going to agree and that's the beauty of having an opinion and a right to voice it. The first day I joined Mylot and I started posting I was so excited to find a place where I could speak and people didn't interrupt me lol, well I offended someone and she let me know about it. I was hurt at first but then I got to thinking not everyone is going to like what I have to say. By your picture you look like a really fun person who thinks outside the box.

I don't know if I offended anyone, but my stars have decreased and I don't know why. I don't really care about that, but I am curious. If I have an opinion about something, even if it's a strong opinion, I'll voice it. That's what's fun about myLot, getting various opinions. I doubt that I've ever changed anyone's mind, but that won't stop me from trying. I think some people are overly sensitive.

I hope it has not happened to me. I don't get email notifications and I only check my friend's list every once in a while. To be "unfriended" just because you don't share the same view is a tad immature. I have read your posts before and you strike me as very intelligent and eloquent and I can't imagine you using an approach that can be considered rude by anyone. It's that person's big loss, I think.

I would probably be neither because my opinion is just that "it is mine" whether people agree with it or not I would hope would not honor or dishonor me. If all you asked for was clarification, than I do not understand, as there will alway be disucssions that will need clarification. Sarafina50

On another site I had the audacity to critique a poem and give it a 3 star rating, explaining although it sounded pretty, it made no sense. She was furious because I didn't give her a 6 star rating. One other member did give her the ultimate rating; it turned out to be her best bud in real life. She figured if one person gave her a six then everyone should. I managed to keep my cool and tried to explain all writing isn't seen and understood in the same manner. She totally went off the deep end threatening to get met kicked off the site for not giving her a 6 and tell everyone she knew on the site how horribly I treated her. I no longer read her work and find that others who read the exchange also stopped reading and rating her work. Sounds like you ran up against another disgruntled 'poet' who only wants to hear how wonderful she is. It's definitely no big loss. I, however, would love to be your buddy. May I?