Are you a packrat?

There's some reason he's hanging onto his belongings and not wanting to get rid of them. I do the same or I use to well.. maybe sometimes I still do it. I have a real tough time with throwing out things that I may want to use someday. I'm a procrastinator when it comes to doing that. When I met my hubby and he decided to come live with me, he did a clean up without my knowledge and when I went to look for something I had from years ago it was gone. I was so angry that he threw it out on me without asking me first! On the other side of the fence, I can imagine how you feel with it though, you may not like his old junk but I would make sure you confirm it at least twice with him before you throw it out. I've learned from my hubby who always said, if you don't use or see something in a year's time and feel nothing about it, then you know you can throw it out. Have a nice day

I am the complete opisite of a pacrat! I like to keep everything stark and clean and no stuff, junk whatever clotting things up! I live with my 76 year old mother who HAS to live in junk! My room is big, clean and airy while hers is so hot and stuffy with only a path to walk through! I think she has kept everything from her childhood, my childhood and her 3 marriages! When you enter her room all you see are stacks and stacks of crap. She said the other night that she was cleaning it up but after she got done, it looked worse then ever. She says she hates living like that but yet she won't let anyone help her. She has stacks and piles and boxes of stuff hear and there all over the house. I have moved them into out of the way places but the cats get into them and pee, yet she won't clean them up nor throw them away and she keeps trying to cover the kitchen counters with junk even though I told her that can NOT happen! I will NOT have a kitchen that looks like her bedroom! Every time she starts putting things on the counters, I take them and dump them into a box and put it in the living room or some other out of the way place. It is a never ending battle! Here is how we live: I live in my big bedroom up stairs and she lives in her piled up bedroom up stairs. We have a big nice clean kitchen down stairs, (thanks to me keeping it that way), and the living room and dinning room are almost empty except for a couple of chairs and a table and all her junk is piled up high all along the sides of the rooms as well as tons of it down the basement. We both have our TVs in our rooms and the cats (30) of them have the run of the whole house! I don't mind the cats, (we both love them) but I hate all her crap all over the place. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that we also have lots of empty boxes and play toys for the cats scattered here and there down stairs for them to sleep in and play with. What a way to live! Oh well, we are basicly happy except for all of her junk and I shouldn't complain because one never knows how long my mother will be with us. What I do know is I love her, I love the cats, and my spelling stinks! Ha ha ha!!

I think it would be very very wrong. My husband and I are both packrats, and I get very offended at people who tell us we should get rid of stuff. It's our stuff, not theirs. I don't tell others what they should buy, or what they should keep. Hanging a tag on someone such as 'packrat' does NOT make it wrong. Funny thing is, often those who are most critical are the ones who come around asking if they can borrow such and such. Think about this carefully, you are not going to change him [temporarily maybe] and he will resent your discarding [and judgements] on his stuff. If you can't live with his stuff---------then you had better re-think your relationship. If you think he has to chose your OR his stuff---------well, lets just say I think that is very manipulative and WRONG.

Yes it would be very wrong! My husband and I are both packrats, and many people seem to feel it is their right to tell us what we can and should not keep. Funny thing is those are the people most likely to come and 'borrow' from our stuff. Why would you think that you or anyone else should judge how much stuff anyone should keep. Just because stuff is old does not make it worthless. I have found that many many of the older good are much more long lasting and workable than the new. You might be able to force your boyfriend to part with some of his stuff, but I would think that at a later time he is going to resent that you did. If you can't live with his 'stuff' then you need to rethink your relationship.

I think I'm a packrat. I'm not that extreme though. I have a lot of things from when I was younger I just can't seem to let it go! I have been trying to get rid of things though by selling them on ebay. It's helping a little bit! You should start selling some of his things little by little on ebay! LOL

No, you definitely cannot start throwing his things away. You will have to handle it in stages. First you can suggest a yard sale. Have him help you pull together some things for you guys to sell. The reason is to make some money off of some stuff that you guys don't use anyway. for things that he can't bear to relinquish to bargain hunters I suggest ebay. This way he can feel that he is getting rid of his finer "collectibles" to a discerning owner. Then there is the tax write off for donating things to The Salvation Army. With each new scheme everything should be getting examined and packed and organized until there are fewer and fewer things. I am married to a packrat.......I have a few more boxes to get through, but we have gone from a housefull of junk to a few boxes......a huge amount of progress.

We've actually both been working on getting rid of stuff, mostly because we feel like we've got way too much clutter. Part of what inspired us to do this was looking at his parents' house. They have so much stuff that they have a couple of rooms that you cannot walk around in, and I cannot see what they need all of this for. If he said he would donate it, why not just offer to do it for him?

How do I deal with a packrat? How ironic, considering that I AM one of them! I have 12 bins plus one for donations, lots of bags, and boxes full of books, magazines, regular papers, school papers and notes, manuals, a lot of things inside that I need to scan to my computer that it'll take me years to do unless there's one that can either scan papers in less than minutes or seconds, or one that can scan both sides of paper, other papers from years past, textbooks, and lots of outfits that I need to donate to make some space. If you came to my room, or to my soon-to-be-apartment/home, it'll be like a warehouse or a storage facility that one can get lost in. That's how much of a packrat I am.

Yes, I am definetly a packrat. I find that I'm afraid to throw things away because I might regret it later. I have had times when I threw something that looked weird away but then maybe a week later I realized what it was and that I needed it. I really don't keep things for sentimental value though, I guess it depends on what it is and if it's a reasonable size. I think it would be wrong to throw his stuff away little by little because there might actually be something there that means alot to him. You could tell him that he has 2 weeks or something to start getting rid of stuff and or you will? Tell him that all the junk it driving you bananas.

Yes I am a pack rat! I would write more but I can barely get to my keyboard because of all the stuff on my desk!!! :D