Will you consider this as cheating? Help.

This has actually happened to me several times. I meet people who are more interesting, more fun to be with, more intellectual and more attractive than my partner. I slowly develop the yearning to talk to the person constantly, even to the point of telling my partner that I'd sleep early (so he'll think I slept) so I could talk to the guy more. Sooner or later, I'd even forget that my boyfriend exists, until finally he notices that I've changed. It boils down to one thing. You cannot expect relationships to be always as exciting as you first were in it. You cannot expect that every moment with your guy be butterflies-in-the-stomach moment. You cannot expect yourself not to get attracted to someone else, and there's no such thing as 'I'll never find someone better than you' for you would find someone sooner or later. The point is, regardless what relationship, there will always be the exciting phase, the butterflies phase, and it will always go back to the boring phase and the tiring phase. I think, the mere fact that the guy is new makes you feel excited to know more and more, it's the mystery that causes you to feel inclined to have more fun with the guy than with current relationship. That's how I felt, but the thought of how we (my partner and I) started always dawns on me. Sooner I realize, looking for someone isn't the solution to the 'boring phase', I always remember that if the relationship changed or became dull, it's also because I'm part of it. I didn't hire some actor or clown to make me laugh all the time, I didn't hire my boyfriend to make me feel fun! We're actually in it together. And the more and more you allow yourself to fall for this new guy, is actually making your relationship with your current boyfriend diminish. Sooner or later you'd realize that maybe you're not for each other, thus relationships fail. One great factor that I have learned from my parents is that love will not always be exciting, you'll even come to the point of feeling that your lives would be ordinary. But loving would entail sacrifice, it will not be a bed of roses all the time. But knowing that that someone is willing to spend his time with you and look at you with loving eyes should be enough for you to say that 'there may be others greater, cuter, funnier, sexier and smarter than this guy, but this is my guy and we've both decided to be partners' should be enough to tell you to divert your attention. What I usually do is that I would be always open to my partner. He doesn't stop me from interacting with other guys (as long as I'm not flirting nor cheating) and whatever we talk about (that's funny or informative) I always share with my guy. This way, our conversations wouldn't be limited to what we know already, now I have a venue to gather some conversations and topics that I would think be interesting for my partner too. Plus, not to mention that I always take the note that the other guy would know that my partner is the one I want. Now, the question would be, are you decided with your guy? or are you just playing around? Me? We've gone through a lot to think that this is child's play. And I'm loving every second with him.

I think there is a time when you really get bored with it. But still the love is still there. You know what's your limit, what is wrong and what is right. But when your having second thought that is different. I could only advice you tell your bf about your getting bored, maybe things will be better. Now if you still feels the same let go. You both tried to work things out, just let go. If you love your bf think it a thousand times first before you decide, men has their own ways, it might just be a mistake that you will regret. You make your own decision, but make it right. About the cheating, no your not, cause you know you have a bf, and you still know your limits. Try to weigh things first. It's only cheating when your moving on and you still have a bf around you waiting for you all the time. Well that's my point of view. God guides you! You might just be lonely, don't make it complicated. Have a nice day to you!

I believe there's such a thing as emotional cheating and then of course physically cheating. The same thing has happened to me before. I felt like I was cheating, but I knew I wasn't really doing anything sincerely wrong. The only thing was that we all three worked at the same place. It was a call center where you could pretty much choose where you wanted to sit. It ended up one day that my then boyfriend was on one side and my new interest on the other side. It was then that my then boyfriend knew the new interest and I had feelings for each other. Nothing was deeply deeply wrong in our relationship on the surface. But, underneath I know we both felt a distance growing between us. I ended up choosing the new interest, and went out with him for about three months. It was quite an experience full of ups and downs. But, I knew that the relationship was not going to have a real future. It was sort of a moment to moment thing to me at least. If you feel that you can truly see a future with your current partner then I would say fight the temptation as there may be more. But, if that's not the case then I would say take the chance on finding a new and possibly more deep love. Experience can go a long way even if it's not all good. I have a different boyfriend now, and I can truly say he is THE one. Funny thing is that I wasn't looking for love. I appreciate him so much more because it took a couple of bad relationships to get to him and before those there were a couple more not even slightly serious short lived relationships. Look deep into your heart and try to see what it really wants. Good Luck =]

I think its cheating because of the nature of the feelings & conversation involved.(Because I know yall aint talking about Oprahs last show)What if it was all talk?What if the moment you left ,this new person started talking to someone else and they give them these same butterfly feelings that they're giving you?Maybe its a hoax because they dont like your current partner and just dont want them to have anyone?Its like that pretty girl who ditched Bill gates because all he talked about was microprocessrs & software.Are you sure you want to make that mistake for what seems to be better?You and your current partner need to have a long talk about what they could do to give you that same feeling.Give them a chance first before youmake your final decision.

I think that falling in love with someone else while you're still in a relationship is a very common human experience and calling it "cheating" would not give justice to yourself. The Carpenters said "breaking up is hard to do" and I agree, but sometimes it must be done to save ourselves and our current partner from suffering over a relationship that no longer works for one or both. It wouldn't be fair to continue seeing another person while ignoring the one you're with nor would be fair to just suffer in silence while your "real love" is someone else. Human relationships were meant to be supportive and healing, and a partner in this case would be willing to let us go if we decided we wanted to split ways. This is a very mature thing to do but would also take a lot of courage because we think we might "hurt" the other persons feelings. This is easier written than done, but in the end, nothing worth getting always involved some amount of pain or discomfort, but the rewards are always greater. I hope you can resolve this issue in your life. God bless.

Ugh, this one doesn't have a black/white answer. _

i think it is cheating because you are cheating with your heart, though you are only talkng with the person, you already have committed a sin against your current partner because you already have developed a liking for another person while you are still in a relationship, and the fact that you are not telling your partner what you are doing, you are most probably guilty of something

yeah, I think so. This is consider cheating because in a relationship you have to be honest always with one's partner for you to have a very smooth relationship and of course to avoid hurting each other. So if I were you, give your time a space and try to think twice if who is the person who can give you more happiness. Then, if you have decided already, talk to the involved person tell him your true feelings so it wont end to a bad ending.. It is understandable of course, because there's no certain in life most especially in love. Just be honest with yourself and to the person involved so you wont have any guilt feelings..

this happened to me a couple of times, yet i chose to stay with my then current love interest. people come and go in our life and all we need to do is accept them as part of our personal history. it's just a matter of prioritizing what we really want in our lives. i refused to let go of my feelings towards my (now) hubby because i want to convince myself that i am already contented with what i have. happiness is relative, after all. good luck in your soul-searching, my friend.

IF you have a romantic relationship with other person and even if it is platonic it is still cheating. You can be friends with the other person just don't get too close if you want a monogamous relationship with your current lover.

In my opinion this is cheating. When you are with your partner you have to be honest with him/her. You may be attracted to the new person, may be the next day you will start liking someone else. I mean this thing goes on and on. But you have to stick with your current partner because i guess you love him/her and he/she loves you. This has happened to me alot of times. Well for me my girlfriend is conisdered to be the best girl in the whole world. But practically speaking this does not always have to be true. There are so many other people who are very attractive and they pull your attention towards them. But i think if you are truthful enough with your partner everything will go right. So dont cheat your partner be honest with them and do your best to keep your relationship alive. keep smiling

i don't think any advise will help you in this situation because its happening with you and nobody accept you can understand what is it an infatuation,crush or true love,you have to understand try comparing both the relationship don't only think about now and only negative qualities of your relationship think about the time you have spend where you have lived to the fullest think about all the good times and fun you had together it maybe both mistake it has become boring now somethings are to be understood which are right in front of us but we tend to forget because of our busy life........try to find out with whom you feel yourself

Hello there. You are not definitely alone in this situation. I am sure, many mylotters can identify with this. Even if you are already committed, or in a relationship, that doesn't stop you from being attracted to someone else. Because you are a human being, capable to admire, see beauty in other person, among others. The feelings we have is quite involuntary. We don't even want it, but it can happen and its there. But that's it. Now, since you are already in a relationship, what to do next would be entirely dependent on what you would want to do. One can only say that we have to avoid the feeling and avoid siuations that will only cause further problem. Like, do we entertain the other person coming to our lives? Or should we totally avoid this other person to avoid whatever new feelings to come? Personally, yes for me. It is already cheating. Entertaining others while already on a relationship, cultivating new bonds other than friendship, that is very dangerous. I am guilty of this somehow and my dear, it would surely be a problem as this will lead you to decide between two persons. And its unfair for your current boyfriend. Just my opinion. Cheers! =)

You and your partner should talk if your relationship is turning out to be bored.. Just to make it exciting once again.. Do not find to others the things that you cant find to your present partner.. You can ask him so he can make some adjustments.. If he can't, then you should decide to call it quits so you wont hurt him incase a new man in your life came..

This hasn't happened to me, although we haven't been married for very long. And it sort of is cheating if you're giving attention to someone that you feel this way about. At the same time, people should be able to have friends, so it's kind of confusing.

Well of course its cheating. If all of your thoughts and time are with another person other than your partner then its cheating on the relationship. The best thing to have done would be to stop the process before it got this far. But, if this is your relationship, only you can decide which way to proceed.

well i guess u shud let ur current partner know that u are seeing someone else

Its not "technically" cheating by my standards, however there is something wrong in this scenerio. I think the best decision would be to leave the person you are with and pursue a relationship with the one you are more interested in. It will save the heartache on both ends if you just cut the ties. That is basically the bottom line for me.

no this has never happened to me i think rather than going with a new man whom u have just met and you dont know is it love or mere crush its better talk about all this to your current boyfriend and discuss that our relationship is not going the right way as it was earlier may be this helps you to create the same magic between you and your current boyfriend what once it can be tried out...........

It has happened to me too. I don't consider it cheating but it could lead to that. I would say that before you decide to do anything give yourself some time to think about things and get to know the new person better. You know how at first when you first meet someone it is always great because they are acting extra nice. Its after a while that you really get to see the real person. So don't do anything in a rush take your time.