lol..i missed much my worst enemy!!!!

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We argued and fight last November 2008. He moved now in Manila this December 2008 for some business matter without us being reconcile. He knows that I got hardheart until we finally shouted at each other for some miscommunication.We do fight when we're still young, in fact he was my worst enemy but have lessen and avoid fights when we got matured eventually and this is the firstime we shouted at each other again after years. He is uncomfortable right now with his health problem whom he hides and insinuates that he is able and healthy. He had been sending "How are you message" at me and I don't feel replying cause I ain't satisfied yet having silent war with him. Part of me want to have conversation with him.Other half of me stays damn cold.I really missed him yet I don't know how to end this rotten feeling I have for him.I'm very cold and numb with my outside look and that is how others knew me.But there is one thing people don't know about me,the fact that I am a sober and that I cries much when I am alone. I'm very affected with our clashed yet I don't know how to end it or maybe it was my pride who's hampering the way.This worst enemy of mine is my younger brother.I wish he could read this and patched things up without me starting the conversation.