advice on what to do

Your step son may have ADDha or another behavioral problem. Maybe you should have him checked. Does he get to see his birth mom very often? How long have you been his step mom? You might look at some food allergies. That can cause a child to act out. He just might not be mature enough to be going to school too. Not all five year olds are ready when they hit the 5 year mark. I know that that would put an extra burden on you but you should look into it.It won't put him behind to go at 6 instead of 5.

There is obviously a reason behind it, have you spoken to preschool about it, does he find it hard there or something. My son is 5 and I've recently started putting buttons in a jar. He started with 10 and if he is naughty one gets taken out and if he is good one gets put in, (within 3 hours of me starting it he was down to 6 buttons!) each button is worth 10pence and every sat morn he counts his buttons and gets the money, that money has to last all week, last night he played me up a lot and I told him the tv would go of early tonight (which it did) and also 2 buttons were removed. Do you spend a lot of time playing with him? I say that because at the weekend when my son is really naughty its usually for attention as he is bored or fed up, the other weekend I was in bed sick and we spent the afternoon playing board games and watching tv together, it was nice, well apart from being sick. Does he spend a lot of time with his dad? My son loves playing games with his dad (not that he does it much) and its nice as they have a chat and he will tell him about school etc. I don't know what else to suggest, like you I've tried time out and the one I do most is tell him Supernanny is coming to stay if he keeps being naughty, I know I shouldn't but he has watched that programme with me and loves it but would hate for her to come here, he will watch it and say 'look they are being naughty' and when I say do you do that he will be honest and say if he has but realises it is wrong. Not sure if I've helped at all but I hope you sort the problem out soon :-)