I'm sorry but it is my business

United States
January 15, 2009 2:28pm CST
It is my business when you disrespect my husband. Is what came out of my mouth when my husband's ex texted us both at 2 oclock in the morning telling him he was a dead beat dad and deserves to never be apart of their lives. Then when I stepped in she said it was none of my business. My husband isn't a dead beat he pays his child support and he tries to see his kids but she keeps them away from him. There is a court order he supposed to see them 2 weekends on Wednesdays. If anything he only gets to see them maybe once. Otherwise, she'll call and chew him out. What do you think of this. Don't call my husband yelling at him, and disrespecting him and when I step in say its not my business. But oh yeah it is, he's my husband and you're not going to call or text him disrespecting him.
3 people like this
18 responses
• United States
15 Jan 09
OMG! Right ON! I can't believe how blod some people can be and I would think it's my business too if some sycho ex started sending texts at all to my boyfriend or husband maybe he should get a cheap prepaid phone in addition to the one he has and give her the new number but the courts keeps his old one he would still have both phones active so the crazy ex wouldn't get suspicious but at least you won't wake up at two in the morning because of rude texts from an ex that just won't let it go act like a grown up!Well Best wishes I hope things get better for you+husband.Happy Mylotting.
• United States
15 Jan 09
That is not a bad idea, I might try that. We do plan on keeping everything that she sends us and text us. So we have proof when we take her to court. Thanks, I know with me stepping in when I need to things should get better. She'll know that I'm not just going to sit by and let her do whatever. I wish she would grow up too. I'm younger than her and she acts more immature than me, now how does that look on her. I act more adult than her. Now thats funny. I'm 26 and she's 35.
• United States
15 Jan 09
35! Na you know she really needs to grow up and get a life!She's not n highschool anymore whe is waaaaay past that!Unbelieveable.
• United States
15 Jan 09
sorry I mean she is waaaaay past that
@tessah (6617)
• United States
16 Jan 09
i do have to agree with you on this. if someone mistreats someone i care about.. whether its my children, my husband, or my friends.. it is definitely MY business as well. not only do i feel its my business, but its also my responsibility to stand up for them, its part of what comes with being in any type of relationship.. and if i sat back and said nothing and allowed others to say, do, and treat them any way they felt like.. itd just say i didnt care about them at all.
@tessah (6617)
• United States
17 Jan 09
yer absolutely right. then itd not only be her showing him disrespect, but you as well for sitting back and allowing it to occur.. whichd speak volumes to her (as well as yer husband, and anyone else) just what you think of the man.
• United States
16 Jan 09
Exactly that is something that I can no longer do. Cause I do care. I think if anyone is in the same situation as me and they don't stick up for their husband it makes people wonder.
@Ithink (9980)
• United States
16 Jan 09
First of all 2 am? I would think she was drunk or something! As for not being your business, I would say oh yeah it is!! That is your husband so everything in his life is his business!!! I hope that you can get them more, maybe go to court as she is breaking the court order by not allowing him to see his kids at the appointed time. Show her what is what!!!
@Ithink (9980)
• United States
17 Jan 09
Good luck with it all!
• United States
16 Jan 09
Thats what I'm thinking that she must have been drunk or something. But my husband stated that was just how she is. I don't know I think she needs some serious help. But we do plan on taking it to court, because she is breaking the court order, and I'm tired of sitting back in the side lines and I know my husband is as well and let her do whatever. So we'll see what happens.
@fwidman (11514)
• United States
15 Jan 09
It IS your business. Even more so at that ungodly hour of the day. 2 in the morning? Was she drunk or stoned or what? Unless there was an emergency that is not the hour to call or text anyone.
• United States
15 Jan 09
Exactly, I totally agree. It wasn't nothing, its like she did that to just chew him out.
@fwidman (11514)
• United States
15 Jan 09
It does, sadly seem like that was her sole purpose, to chew him out.
@lynnemg (4529)
• United States
15 Jan 09
You are right, it is definately your business. You and your husband are MARRIED not dating!!You did good to stand up like ou did. I read that you are going through court. Be sure to make it clear that SHE has been violating the visitation order. Each and every time she tries to stop him from spending that time with his kids, legally, she cannot stop him. If he were to call the law each and every time, one of two things would happen. Either she would end up in jail, or she wouls stop playing her games. I am not one that like resorting to the law for things, but in this situation, it may be the only solution. Personally, I think she still wants to be in his life and is using those kids as her own little pawns in her game.
• United States
15 Jan 09
I totally agree. My husband is the type of person who doesn't like to get the law involved either. But this has gone too far and I told him that. He has every right, since he pays his child support. Yeah, I am starting to think that she still wants to be in his life as well. She has displaying that she is. And the sad thing about it she is that she is married to a pastor. And she acts the way she does.
• United States
15 Jan 09
Yeah I think your right lynnemg she just can't accept the fact that he's moved on with his life.
@CRIVAS (1815)
• Canada
16 Jan 09
I agree with you, if someone called disrespecting my husband I would go up one side of them and down the other. I am sorry that this women seems tobe so unreasonable, as long as you and your husband know he is a good father that is all that matters, she is probably just jealous of your relationship together. Calling someone for any reason other than an emergency just shows how immature she really is. As for your husbad not getting to see his child very often, I would tell the cort. Once a judge rules on visitation rights the ruling is set up. If she isn't letting him do that he needs to take action against her. I hope that everything works out okay and you keep standing by your man.
• United States
16 Jan 09
Yeah I agree and he knows that I will always stand by him through thick and thin. I think that night really showed him how much I will be beside him. We do plan on taking it to court, due to the fact that she is not following court order and we plan on taking every action we can, so that he can be apart of his son's life.
@nana1944 (1364)
• United States
16 Jan 09
Trisha, you are so right! It is your business with a capital B. I saw where you said she is now a preacher's wife. Call her husbamd and tell him he needs to find out what his wife is doing at that time of the morning. Ans then tell him. Or go to their church and confront her in front of her husband's congregation. You sound like a very level headed young lady. Hang in there for your love.
• United States
16 Jan 09
That is something my husband and I have talked about because it is interesting that she only acts this way when her husband is not around and so now we have the proof that she has been harrassing us to show to her husband and we have the date and the time. We also have this proof to take to court because of her harrassment.
• Canada
16 Jan 09
It's not even the fact that she is disrespecting him it is the simple fact that he is your hubby. Anything that concerns him is now your business since the day you married him. When his kids come for a visit, it is your house too and it concerns you as well as him. The next time she tries that crap I would be telling her that until she realizes that it is your business you are gonna keep getting in her face about it. I wouldn't stand for that kind of crap either. Good for you for standing up and havin your say. So many just let their S/O deal with the exes but they do not understand that they need to show the ex that they cannot keep trying to real the person back in cause it ain't gonna work.
• United States
16 Jan 09
Exactly, I have sat on the sidelines before in the past, but no more. She is really going to see what type of person I am.
@annjilena (5618)
• United States
16 Jan 09
it,s your business iam sorry.when you married him it became your business.
• United States
16 Jan 09
Exactly everything that is his business is my business and everything that is my business is his business.
@sid556 (30959)
• United States
16 Jan 09
If he pays his support and if she is the one keeping him from seeing his kids then he is not a deadbeat. Even if he were....2 in the morning makes her just plain ignorant and rude. She sounds crazy and I can only imagine how the kids minds are getting poisened. Maybe it's time for him to step in and turn the tables on her.
• United States
16 Jan 09
Yeah, I believe something is going on with her or has some type of obsession or something. The kids are so relieved to be with us when they get the chance. But I think if anyone's mind have been poisened by all this would have to be his youngest and I hate it. His oldest, on the other hand doesn't put up with any of it always tries to get away. 2 oclock is ridiculous as well and I did inform her that she is the deadbeat for trying to keep him away from his kids.
• United States
16 Jan 09
sure is I would have given her and ear full let me tell you I do not blame you one bit thank God I do not have to deal with that my Bf has no other childern but our daughter and he prob never will have any more! So thank god!
• United States
16 Jan 09
That is good that you don't have to deal with that. I guess that comes along with the whole package when you're with someone who has kids. But I don't mind, it doesn't bother me one bit.
@lisa0502 (1724)
• Canada
15 Jan 09
It certainly is your buisness. You are now apart of him whether she likes it or not. And you for sure have the right to stand up and say so. I am not a fan of women that do this. The man does what he can but she denies him his rights. It is certainly nice to hear that you are going to fight this one. All kids deserve to have a father that wants to spend time with them in their life.
• United States
16 Jan 09
I totally agree. Ab=nd I think anyone who denies a father visitation except on certain instances is crazy. There are alot of women out there who have to raise kids on their own, because the father doesn't want anything to do with the children. I did let her know, that no matter what, I will always be apart of his life, and that there was nothing that she could do about it.
@JenInTN (27514)
• United States
15 Jan 09
Heyya trisha_nava! Sounds like you are in a tough predicament with this ex wife of his. It is your business the way she speaks to him because it effects you directly. In my opinion...and it's just that...record very time she does this and before you even say hello say..you are being recorded. Save the texts and record the calls..always letting her know before she says a word she is being recorded. Your husband will need to do this too. She'll definately think twice about what she says and how she says it. She may think your gathering some kind of evidence for custody or even harrassment. maaybe you will.If she asks why..both of you need to tell her "we're tired of this treatment and it's going to stop" It will get her to thinking I bet.
• United States
15 Jan 09
That is definitely a good idea and I'll try that out. With the recording of messages and stuff.
@myskina (182)
• China
16 Jan 09
well . take it easy . everything is gonna be okey . that's not your fault . you can use the calm way to talk about of it with him . nothing serious . it's really not your business . do not use to apologize to anybody . anything
• United States
16 Jan 09
It will always be my business, as long as he is my husband and those are his kids. And that is something she hates. But oh well. I will always make it my business.
• United States
15 Jan 09
I see by further comment that you have talked your husband into going to court over this. Keep your temper, watch your words. Good luck and hopefully your husband and his child can have a good relationship.
• United States
15 Jan 09
I will make sure to watch that, for the sake of his children, because he does deserve the right to be with his kids.
@Fortunata (1135)
• United States
15 Jan 09
Mmm, too bad she has to have your phone number. She sounds like a real peach. I don't blame you for being angry. Maybe change your number and make sure it's to a landline, where she can't text?
• United States
15 Jan 09
I wish that she couldn't have our number at all, but I don't know maybe a landline will have to do. But the text messages, she doesn't know will be proof when we go to court, showing that she has been harrassing us.
• United States
15 Jan 09
thats bad situation. if he is supposed to see the kids she should let him. its not her place to tell him no. and as far as her disrespecting him. she needs to chill out. i have some what of a similar situation with my hubbys baby momma. she is just drama
• United States
15 Jan 09
Thats what I tell my husband every time that she can't tell you you can't see them. His ex is all but drama as well. She'll even smile in your face and then talk about you to your face.
@kerri1981 (133)
• United States
15 Jan 09
Oh for sure I remember talking to you over the phone about this Yep it sure is your business. She needs to grow up and take care of her kids and do whats right or she's gonna land herself a trip to jail.
• United States
15 Jan 09
Exactly, I totally agree. Or one or both of them would want to come move with us.