Friends that are not the best for you

Let her know how much you love her as a friend . Tell her you want to be her friend but you don't want to watch her do this to herself . Tell her you will do anything to help her change her life around , but if she chooses to live like she does now , you wouldn't feel comfortable with her being around your children . Tell her you are scared that by bieng around her might temp you to fall back into that lifestyle also . You have to be 100% honest with her and yourself . Good luck . Cheryl

If she is still in her old destructive lifestyle and you are trying to keep your life straight I would say it's best to keep your distance from her. She sounds like she has the potential to be a very bad influence on you. You don't need that influence in your life. Your family needs to be the most important thing in your life right now. If your gut is telling you you don't need to hang around her don't do it. I think you've pretty well answered your own question about what to do in this situation just by posting this.

Personally it sounds like for me, you need to follow your gut feelings on this one. If you are feeling like you would be better off without her in your life, then this might be what you have to do. If you are Happy with your husband and your life now the way it is, you need to do what is best for you. You just need to really weigh this situation and then act on it, and if that means telling her you need to be away from her, do it gently and then have no regrets moving on from there as well.

This is what I call a "toxic relationship" and my advice to you would be to tell her (in person or in a letter) how much you care about her and your friendship but as long as she is living the lifestyle she is living, you will not be able to be a part of her life. I would tell her that you would love to be able to help her but she has to WANT to help herself for it to stick. I would also tell her that your focus is now on your children and until she gets her act clean, it is not healthy for you and your children for her to continue to be a part of your lives. I had a friend that I met in junior high too. We didn't become instant friends, she was a year old and was going on to high school so I did not see her for a couple of years but when she was a senior and I was a junior, we reconnected and became very close friends. We did a lot of things together and I have some great memories with her in my life but there were a lot of toxic things about her relationship and when I had my son and got married, I realized that having her as a part of my life was not healthy for my son or my marriage. I cut her out and moved on. I believe people come in our lives for a reason.. some stay longer than others but when the reason they came is over, it's time to move on and it sounds like it's time for you to move on and put your focus on your marriage and your children and not on having a "party friend" to hang out with and be young with again. I know what it's like and I know how hard it is but you will be happy in the end - when you look at your children later and realize you did the right thing. Good luck to you!

yeah its true!there's no BEST Friends in this small world..but i still believe those GOOD Friends around....in your case,its just that you have chosen the wrong person,knowing her for long time already maybe your basis to get away with her influence.

Hi I too had some experiences when I was studied in hostel. This all are our thoughts and our decision that we have to take on time it is better you have to take which one will stabilize you and your family and which will provide permanent happiness to both you and your family. Friends also important but there is an limit and extension for it, I hope you know it very well.

I love a girl very much. to be true she is my first love and i fell in love with her at first sight. Let me tell u about me i am a bit practical guy and have a scientific insight over life. Initially i felt it is infatuation but truly i am crazy abouit her. We are good friends todays, very good friends. She takes me as a good person bcoz i am always aorund her in her need of times. She even knows that i love her very much. but the problem is she is already engaged into relation with some other guy. As a friend we are really good to each other. But her love and friendship is spoiling me. I am trying my best to get her in my life as my love and in this trials I am wasting lots of time after her. I am very constructive person, and becoz of her i cannot think any thing constructive. On contrary i get destructive ideas of breaking her relationship with her boyfriend. But i am not that kind of a person. Oh god what has happen to me!! Please save me. Why did i fell in love. Seriously love is very painful. Seriously this friend of mine is not good for me.

You can continue with the relationship but you need to be really careful. It is very easy for the kids to folllow the bad company and teh bad habbits. So be aware of whatever step you take. If you can maintain certain distance then only get into a relationship with her otherwise leave it.

Most of the people surrounding me would be just my companions.I hardly find trutsble friends nowadays.I do not know to act like them too especially people who come for some need and disappear from me after they get what they need from me.Most of the people i find are jealous and fake.I have two best friends and i have five surrounding me ,declaring themselves as ma best friends where they are actually not

just honestly , do your self ! if you think you have help her enough that's enough, every one have their mind's and they can choose their way's to go. don't make your self into trouble if people was ignore your advice. enough,to do your self better, you can't control other's, what you can do now just straight talking to her what you think , honestly. then what her next step,no body can help if she still don't want to change.