Must I Accept Child Support?

you should have accepted it. it is his responsibility to help raise that little boy. most men would have to be made to pay so that does say a little something for him offering alto i think he's horses patotie for abandoning u. how are y'all doing. give nico a big hug from me.

you should accept the offer you are in need of money. when i was on your shoe i never did asked nor hear she was offering for any help from my partner but rather keep my ego drive me and prove that even without his support i will live without her and 6 years from that moment i manage to make my own success. in your case he was offering that the way he can help you why not accept it. as you said if you were a practical person you should take it its not yours to be used its for the child you are having so don't think twice live the pass behind and live for today that the baby needs for. changing your decision's doesn't make us down but make us think of a better way of understanding. i wish your success sweety... go go single parent...

When my daughters' father and I divorced, I gave up alimony but I insisted on child support. He had not abandoned his responsibilities as a father, at that time, but he felt that I didn't not "need" or "deserve" alimony. My lawyer did not want me to give it up but I just wanted the whole thing to be over with. The reason I insisted on the child support payment (to be calculated by the government tables and not just a random agreed upon figure) is that I felt we both brought the children into the world and we both owed them whatever we could provide for them. I didn't think that should become my responsibility alone. However, my ex moved across the country and no longer has any contact with the girls, other than sending his checks once a year and usually a birthday or Christmas card (sometimes a gift, sometimes not). I am their sole custodial parent so I make any decisions when it comes to them. I know that having no contact is his decision and that's fine. In the meantime, I don't think it's unrealistic to expect a man to support children that he has fathered. I think, as women, we feel the need to "prove" that we can make it on our own ... and of course we CAN ... I just don't know that we SHOULD. Knowing that you need the money, you might reconsider accepting his offer of support for the baby. Is he offering to pay on an on-going basis? If you do accept, I highly recommend that you get a formal agreement in writing. It would be in the best interests of all concerned. I wish you much luck maple_kisses.

If this childs father is offering to pay support it is something that your child is entitled to. I would do it legally - let it be recorded in the court. You could set up an account with your childs name on it and let it go into that account directly. Have the account set up in such a way that you can get money from it in case of an emergency. If you do not have to use it then it will build up and be there for yoour child for something such as going to college. The father is out of the country right now so you do not have to worry about visitation and maybe by the time you do the child will be old enough to deal with it. Good luck - but don't let this man off scott free.

I think this decision can only be made by you because society is jaded when it comes to fathers and child support. I however agree and understand you not wanting to get child support. Might i suggest some thing that will keep loved ones off your back yet not accept the child support. Next time you have contact with the father tell him that if he wants to help support your child he can set up a college fund for the child, I have requested this and its stopped my family and friends from telling me i should have taken him for all its worth, Now mind you the father has yet to do it and i dont think i will ever receive a penny from him and my life is happier sence

Well the question would be do you want the daddy in your childs life or not? If he does not pay child support then he does not have rights. If you ask for it and he pays then you have to let him have visitations to the child. I wouldn't want it if I were you and he just left the child. But then a child has a right to know his father and if he is working abroad he may help you provide a way better standard of living for your child.

i am in the similar situation myself. my ex husband and i parted ways on mutual understanding a few years ago. i was also asking the same question then, whether or not to ask for support, or receive support when if he offers. up to now i am working hard to provide for my son myself. although he gives money irregularly (he doesn't have a stable job), i make sure he knows its for his son. either he will deposit it directly to my son's bank, or pay the months tuition directly at school.

Accepting child support doesn't necessarily mean accepting visitation. Child support payments aren't payment for a service rendered -- they are support payments because he is legally responsible for helping to support the life that he helped create. If the father wants to see his son, there are things he's going to have to do, legally, and then to demonstrate to you that he's a good role model for your little boy, before you have to agree to that. I would accept the child support. Since he's living abroad, it's not as if he's going to come to your doorstep to give you the money and demand to see his son. That's not how it works anyway.

Hi maple, In all honesty, I really think you should accept the money because even how hard headed you feel about your ex I think it would be a very good idea to do that. Maybe you don't have to directly take that money but open an account for your baby and just get your ex to put the funds in that account. Have it there for your child's future. These days and I can also imagine how the future is going to be with the cost of things. When your baby gets to a certain age, your baby can have their own account and use the money for sports, or things they need for school and so on... Good luck

Yes, you must accept child support. At this time and age everything is so expensive and your kid is growing up and needs get expensive as well especially if the kids starts going to school. The father should give support to the child after all he is the biological father and it is his responsibility to give support to the child. Don't make it a burden for you supporting the child alone you did your part already and now that the father offers support accept it. It is his responsibility. Hope this helps you.

That money belongs to your baby. Your baby deserves it! If your ex wants strings attached, then he should know that he can't do that! But don't deprive your baby of the things he could be getting from his father because you are afraid to get mixed up with his dad again. Keep your distance if you have to, but don't deny your child what is rightly his because of your discomfort.

If you need the money, I suggest you rethink his offer. It's his child as well, which means that he should be paying at least a little towards upkeep and clothes, toys etc. It is the responsibility for a mother to make sure her child has the best start in life, and if it means taking money from the father then so be it in my opinion! He should face up to his responsibilities and pay up!