What to do?
By Jo Hill
@Carpathian (582)
United States
January 27, 2009 5:49pm CST
My daughter has just turned 16 yesterday. But, I also found out something else. She was sleeping and I walked in to wake her up and she was covered from head to toe. That is not the problem the problem was she was having a dream and talking in her sleep about a guy she likes. It was a hot dream and she had her hands in places I did not think I would ever want to see her hands go. Top and bottom in front. You know! Anyways, I mentioned it to her and she was embarrassed but,is this normal behavior? And, what do I do when my husband goes to wake her up. And, I know she has not done anything with a boy yet, but I feel this dream is telling me she is really thinking about it. I talked the talk with her but, I don't think I can handle her doing it! She is still my baby girl even at 16. What do I do and how do I let her grow-up?
8 people like this
11 responses
@barehugs (8973)
• Canada
28 Jan 09
My Dear Woman: You are in the wrong century! This is 2009. Your daughter is already sexually mature, and you stand to lose her love and trust, if you don't smarten up, and soon.You have already embarrassed the Hell out of her by intruding in her fantasy. You need to sit down with her and explain your actions, Your daughter is perfectly normal, You are abnormal in your backward thinking.
Of course she is thinking about it! She is a healthy 16 year old. Neither you or your husband have the right to walk into your daughter's room without the courtesy of knocking.How would you like it if she walked into your privacy without knocking? Begin to think of her as a Young Adult. She is sexually Mature already. You need to Hope that you still have her trust. Go to her now and apologize for your ignorance.
3 people like this
@stella1989 (2274)
• India
28 Jan 09
I really like your response to this..
This is every teenagers questions.. that how she or he gonna react in front of there parents .. in this kinda situtation..
thanks..
Keep it up with your yoga.
I started practising it with my mother but.. I failed to give my time..
I started practising it with my mother but.. I failed to give my time..
@kprofgames (3091)
• United States
28 Jan 09
I agree with not entering a room without knocking. To be honest, she's 16. She should be waking up on her own to her own alarm clock.
A bedroom should be one's own private space and knocking before entering is a sign of respect. Respect between people in a household should go both ways.
1 person likes this
@gracie04 (4549)
• Philippines
28 Jan 09
Be sure to talk about morals and values.. but we can't avoid the fact that teenagers are experimental in real life.. just be there for your daughter and remind her about the things she should do or shouldn't.. it's best if you talk about the pros and cons of doing that thingy, etc..
@sudiptacallingu (10879)
• India
28 Jan 09
The fact that you have already spoken to her is a step in the right direction. What she is doing is nothing abnormal…most girls and boys her age please themselves and its much better than going ahead and doing the actual thing. Its difficult I know, but she’s no longer a baby girl. I don’t think her dad should be the first to wake her up…girls her age need more physical privacy and it would be better if you spoke to her dad about this. Being a woman, you could talk to her, her dad would be more embarrassed if he ever walked in and saw her sleeping in an uncomfortable position.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (93889)
• United States
29 Jan 09
Well, I'm not a parent, but I would be concerned where she has planned the relationship to go. Dreams don't just come out of nowhere. But then again, dreams don't mean a person is going to act on it. As for if it is normal, I never did that, or had that happen. Neither did my sister. So I don't know if others were doing that at sixteen.
@palonghorn (5479)
• United States
28 Jan 09
Your other responses are all good and well, however, I raised two girls. And yeah it's normal behavior, she is getting curious, sexually, ( I know you just cringed lol) The other best thing you can do for you and more so for her, get her on birth control.........now, first off keep in mind, she may be on birth control, doesn't mean she is going to NEED it. She may very well wait until she is married. Let them grow up is the hardest part. Also, discuss it with your husband, and tell him it's all part of growing up and it's normal.
1 person likes this
@mansha (6298)
• India
28 Jan 09
I feel first of all you buy her an alarm clock and secondly do not worry, its a natural stuff she was doing. If you have taught her well she will pass this phase too but meanwhile just give her some privacy and repect her space. Do not let her get jumbled up in guilt, over touching herself she has every right to do so. Its natural and normal instinct.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
28 Jan 09
i don't know whether it is normal or not but facts or facts. she's your baby but at 16 she's not a baby anymore. did u tell your husband? y'all need to have a talk w.her about the birds & bees. don't be surprised if she already knows more than you. kids are ot kids for long anymore.
@deepak_unlimited (66)
• India
28 Jan 09
i think no one can change anyone's thinking.....if ur daughter will think to do something then anyone cant stop...if she dont wanna do den she will never do anything wrong in any circumstances...bcoz this is the human nature anyone cant changa...
meanwhile the parent should act as a friend to their children and should tell about good and bad things....and wat r the effect of doing anything on thier life....
@sravani128 (65)
• India
28 Jan 09
As she is so small u need to take care as much as possible so that her life wont spoil....
