why guys have kids and dnt stay with the mother

I don't think alot of these ppl think about how it will affect the kids as they grow up without a dad around. It's too bad that the old tradition of getting married first and then having kids has all but disappeared. Too often the couples aren't married or they rush into a marriage only to end it right away at the first sign trouble. [b]~~AT PEACE WITHIN~~ **STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS**[/b]

I know what you are getting at but sometimes things just don't work out the way that it should. When I was eighteen, I was young and in love and life was at my doorstep. I wanted to have a child so bad with my then fiance`. He was everything to me and I thought he felt the same way about me. Well, when I got pregnant, it wasn't really planned but I didn't do anything to prevent it either. I knew then that there was another girl that he had already inpregnated, but I didn't care about that. We were together since I was sixteen. We had broken up for about six months so I can get some things in my life straightened out and so could he. In the meantime, he ended up being with this girl and accidentally got her pregnant. After that happened, we ended up working things out with eachother and got back together. He bought me a ring and popped the BIG question and of course I said yes! I thought that we had a love that would last, even though my family dissaproved. He was almost nine years older than me and my family thought it was too big a gap for someone of my age. I didn't care, he was everything in my eyes! Love is blind!!! Well, when I found out that I was pregnant, we just moved into an apartment together and I thought that this would be the beginning of the rest of our life together. We had already developed a plan that he would share custody of his other child and life would be fine. That was not the way it turned out though. When he laid eyes upon his very first child (the other woman's baby), he was instantly in love and my heart was broken. He decided that he wanted to be in his other child's life 24/7. That is when we decided it would be better to seperate. This was to be our final and most heart-breaking seperation. I was so devestated. When it was time for me to have my own baby, he did come to the hospital to see the baby being born but that was one of the last times I had ever seen him, I think he was too enthralled with his first born. He saw my son maybe five times in his life and that was all before he was a year old. My son is eleven years old now. Although he doesn't get to be raised by his birth father because of his bone-headed decisions, my son has been raised by a very loving father that has not only been raising him as his own, he has loved him like his own. My husband is not one of those people that would ever walk out on our children. We have two additional children now and life is truly good now! Sorry to go on and on, I know that I have practically written a book here, but I felt the need to share my story with you, to show you that sometimes things just don't work out the way you thought that they would. And not everyone will walk away, you have to be able to put your trust in someone and believe that sometimes, it really does work! I have been married for almost ten years now and my husband ended up adopting my son when he was 5! Just look for a silver lining, ok?