my life
By fatboy4
@fatboy4 (39)
New Zealand
February 1, 2009 2:40am CST
I dont know if this is a good thing for me to do or not.Imgoing to tell you all about my hard tragic painful life with my family and to invite comments on it. This is a horror story and might upset a few of you but im after some sort of closure and hope over this whole thing i can make some sense out of it with your help.So im going to start with before i was conceived.At the age of 20 my mother went to a party and meet this 16 year old, after a one night stand she found herself pregnant with me.My grandfather with my mothers help tract him down and what followed was a shot gun wedding.When she was 6 months pregnant he kicked her in the stomach over and over again but i hung in there. when i was 6 weeks old he tried to kill me by throwing me out a 2 story window where they lived. fortunately he didnt throw me hard enough and i hit the windowsill and landed on the bed below.MY head hit the windowsill and i ended up with 4 stitchers above my left eye.The scars still there and its a constant reminder of what he did.Till this day i still dont understand how anyone can hate something so small and helpless but that is how my life started.When i was 2 and ahalf he tried again, this time he delibrately back over me with the car.I was given to my grand parents for a while so my parents could get things sorted out.Back then this was a common thing to do, police didnt have the same rights they have now.Thats part one over, things get worse from here.
3 people like this
4 responses
@kishusia (1066)
• India
1 Feb 09
I am sorry to read about your life. I am a Hindu and can tell you how I feel about these things under my religious beliefs. Our relationships with people in this birth are determined by our relationships with people in our previous births. The situations (good or bad) we face in this birth are the result of our actions in our previous births. As we do not remember anything from our earlier births, we are not able to understand the logic behind these situations. We have a right over our Karma (actions) but we do not have any right over the result of our actions. The result is decided by the God based on goodness or badness of our actions. We can not escape it. We have to face the result. But while facing these situations we should keep a positive attitude and complete (unshaken) faith in God and His justice and kindness.God is very kind. Those who have faith in Him, He looks after them. May God shower His kindness on you.
@fatboy4 (39)
• New Zealand
1 Feb 09
early in life i tried to identify with god. But the more i tried to understand the more i was confused.I have lost faith because i cant believe that god could put such hardship on a child no matter what they did or didnt do in a earlier life.How can he be so cruel and ruthless to let anyone go through so much pain. iknow that there must be a reason for the pain .but i have been a good person and always will be,but i am still being punished to this day and i dont understand why.
@turandotty (228)
• United States
1 Feb 09
I'm really sorry, that is terrible. You are better off without your father in your life. He is not worth a second of your life anymore. I hope you start over again and feel better.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
20 Feb 09
i'm sorry u had such a rough beginning. he should have been put under the jail. where ws your mom when all this was going on? she didn't have to live w/that sorry thing.
@censae (72)
• United States
30 Mar 09
I am so very sorry that your life had such tragic beginnings. I feel very sorry that your have no faith because of it. There is one thing in particular that God has given you. He has given you the capacity to forgive. Forgiveness is your way to freedom and peace. It may not be given for you to understand why your parents and grand parents made the decisions they made. Surely, you had no way to prevent the events that followed those decisions. It is douboutful that knowing the reasons will make you feel any less hurt. Forgiving them does not excuse them for what they did. Forgiveness is for you first. It helps you to release the blam and deal with the pain appropiately. Why are you carrying the burden of other peoples misdeeds. They will answer for them on their own. Forgiving someone is not an easy and quick process sometimes. You must first forgive their cruelty and evil ways first with your intellect. It will soon move down to your heart. That is your path to freedom and the pursuit of happiness. Look at the pain that they bestowed on God's Son and yet he forgave. You too have that capacity and power. God loves you. Think of yourself as being worthy of the love of others. Good luck to you.
