my life part 2

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from the time i first can remember i was around 4 years old and that first memory was of how much my father hated me and how my mother blamed me for ruining her life. to this day she still feels the same way. by this time she had 2 more children to this animal and my life was horrible and the violence was really bad.he beat her and me up on a regular bases. i remember pain and i remember being sore but i dont remember what he did to me at those times i just remember the pain.At this age i knew he hated me but i didnt understand why. the harder i tried to be a good girl the worse he got.It didnt matter to him how much he was hurting me and the older i got he hurt me more. when i was five mum had another baby to him. i dont remember how he was with the other siblings because i think i was to wraped up in my own pain to care.6 months after starting school he went to prison for man slaughter and robbery. mum constantly blamed me for it. because she loved him and still blamed me for ruining her life.When i was six i made a friend. he owned the butcher shop outside the school bus stop.i was constantly hungry mum was trying to pay for everything since my father was in prison.He made friends with me by giving me a savorly every morning.Then he starting telling me how pretty i was. he started touching me and got me to touch him. he didnt want me to tell mum how friendly we were because she might get upset.I remember going to school with wet knickers one morning and upset because he wet them, i didnt know what it was until a few years later