How to be disobey my husband, but still be a good wife?

Hi friend, I understand your situation, I hope, because I've been to such sometime ago. I was a career woman and actually was on my peak of my career. We had lots of debts so it was terrible pressure, from office, from debts, from my kids and I thought from my husband. I thought I won't be able to survive but fortunately, I did. Do you think you know your husband that long and do you think you really know the way your husband thinks? I hope you do. They always tell me to talk with my husband, and tell him so and so, but actually it will be only you who will sort this out. Although I have made big sacrifices, like giving up my career to support my husband and to allot my whole time with my kids, it was worth it. So I think maybe, the first thing you should do is to Stop and allow yourself to think. Is your relationship still worthy to fight for, considering the years you had together? Do you still have some respect for him? When you answer yes to these, then maybe start doing it your husband's way for the mean time. I know there's no full-proof ways to have a happy married life. But one thing I noticed, when I stopped going against my husband, things started to come in their proper place. When my husband saw that my family is my priority, he's the one who started to tell me, you should go out, have a rest, and then started giving me more freedom to where I want to go, take more activities that I would like, but at the same time not forgetting them. Try it, hope it works. Just my two cents.

I think you guys have A LOT to talk about and probably some counseling would help. I'm a stay at home mom too at my husbands request. I've been like that for 7 years now since we've been married. He's been the sole provider of our house but soon he might now be since the store he's working for is closing so we're in a similar situation. He has to understand that your child has 2 parents, and not just one. Also, does your husband go out or does he stay home and do nothing (meaning not going out to have fun and meet with friends)? If he can go and you can't then there's a double standard there. He is being too controlling and you need to sit him down and let him know it's not okay with you. You are not just a mother, but his wife and a person as well and you need the same things as most other people need. I don't go out that much (or at all) outside of with my kids, but that's my choice and my husband would allow me to go out (although I don't always like leaving my kids home alone because he lets them run wild..lol) but he still understands the fact that i need some personal time as well. in most relationships you need your own "ME TIME". There's nothing wrong with him watching your son for a few hours while you meet with someone. it doesn't take much money or any at all to talk with people. If you're husband can't understand this, then you will have to suggest some type of counseling.

First of all, you should never have to ask to go out. You can go wherever you want when you want, you have a life too. I'm sure he goes out and has friends. Everyone needs friends so if you want to make new friends, go ahead and do it. And please. do not ask permission to go out. He is controlling you and deep down you know it and you know you should not be putting up with it.

Hi b3rn1c3. I am sorry about how your husband is with you. I recommend reading fascinating womenhood. It is a great book that will change your marriage to the better. I started reading this book because I felt my marriage wasn't good. It is amazing how I am not even half way throught the book and so much has changed between me and my husband. We are alot happier together and I think it is due to changing some of the ways I deal with him and the way I treat him. I think it is worth it to you to try the book out. You have nothing to lose but alot to gain. If you want to know some of my experience search the discussion I started on this book called fascinating womenhood. I hope this helps you.

I feel your husband is worried about the son and his future. He feels a mom should be with him always and take care of his growth.So..try to manage time, so he is also happy and you can continue your interest too..