How do you deal with Report Card Day?

United States
February 10, 2009 1:26pm CST
My husband and I have always felt that as long as our children try their best and put forth 100% effort, that the grade itself is unimportant. In fact, before we even look at their report card we ask that question and address it. Last week the kids came home with their report cards. Two of our children did well, however, the other did not. In fact, she failed 2 subjects and received a D in 2 other subjects. When asked the question (which we had before when progress reports came out), are you trying your best...her response was no. When we asked why, she said she didn't care and pretty much stated that the only thing that matters is socializing at school. Needless to say, she is now grounded for the entire 3rd marking period. How do you deal with your kids report cards?
1 person likes this
6 responses
bonnie
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
12 Feb 09
good for you. now she will probably try harder. i know school is quite boring and hard for most kids but they need it. more so today. i have a friend that went to college but all she did most her school years is socialise. i only went to ninth grade and im always the one helping her with internet, and understanding a lot of other things. shes always asking what does this mean and that mean? i cant believe she wasted all her education by not learning anything
eksmith
@eksmith (64)
• United States
12 Feb 09
Thank you bunnybon7 - I truly hope it makes her try harder. She is so intelligent and has everything to offer, it's sad to see her walking down this path. A person can only learn and be educated if they want to be. It seems to me that even though you only went to 9th grade, you obviously still wanted to learn and educate yourself. I have a personal belief that is basically this - When it comes to education, you don't need an institution to learn, you only need to have the desire and determination to learn. Take care!
mrgeebee
@mrgeebee (133)
• United States
12 Feb 09
ive had 5 children and so far im lucky they all graduated ,however theres on remaining in school . my daughter hopefully will graduate this june and move on to nursing as she so desires . I always accepted a Hard C over anything else .If they struggled i did what i could to help , if they worked thier butts off and got the Hard C , i was content .I have one son who got nothing but As and Bs through out school. I never even looked at his cards , i knew what he had and if he had a low grade hed say so and work on it . Now with my daughter and people will hate me for this , it was good till the boy years came to view , the grades dropped the groundings began . Theres nothing wrong with a little puppy love but it gets serious as teens . I resorted to BRIBERY ! yes bribery, it works real well . I reward her with said amount for each quarter and for the final of the year the bonus round..a shopping spree . Ive only got out of one of those as i reducted for a year in summer school . I know shes smart and I know shell do just fine in the future and im proud of all of them . Groundings end in resentment , try to avoid , merit them instead
eksmith
@eksmith (64)
• United States
12 Feb 09
I know what you mean. Our daughter is 17 and BOY CRAZY!!!! Every relationship with her is serious within a matter of a week. Our son is the complete opposite. Our other daughter is smack dab in the middle. We're pretty much the "whole spectrum". We've tried bribery, but it hasn't worked. Thanks for your thoughts mrgeebee.
lynnemg
@lynnemg (4529)
• United States
10 Feb 09
If I know that my kids have really been trying and putting forth good effort, I don't get too upset about grades. I know what my kids are capable of, and I know that there are times when they just do not want to pay attention and do their work. On report card day, I will take the report card from them, ask them how they feel they did, and them look at it myself. If a grade has gone up, I praise them for it, the same goes if they maintained a grade. If I see that one went down, I ask them why they think that happened. I think it is important to let them know that I am proud of them no matter what the report card shows, and if they are having tropuble, I am here to help them out.
rmorefield
@rmorefield (941)
• United States
12 Feb 09
Thankfully, I don't have to worry about the actual grade. My daughter is always on either the a or a/b honor roll. And my son is home-schooled because the elementary school didn't offer classes that would stimulate his brain enough. They think that all children should learn the same things at the same time...and my son is way ahead of the others. He is categorized as being in the third grade, but his english/reading is on a 5-6 grade level, and his math is bordering on the 5th grade. And that doesn't count the other subjects we have been working with him on.
Jae2619
@Jae2619 (1483)
• United States
10 Feb 09
We hold the same outlook. We expect our child who's in the 1st grade to do his best and if he tried his hardest then that's all we can ask of him. Thankfully, he's done great so far, made princples honor roll both quarters, and hopefully he'll continue to do his best the rest of his school days.
agreen
@agreen (39)
• United States
11 May 09
My husband and I do worry about the actual grade. We would love to not have to worry about grades but they cannot fail. If we don't worry about the actual grades our children make then they could end up failing that grade and having to repeat it. I think that would be worse than grounding them or taking away a privilage because they received a bad grade. But, we also make sure and figure out why they receive a bad grade. Was it not paying attention, talking, playing in class, etc.