Do you think first-time-sleep-with-each-other enhances love for each other
By abhi_dude
@abhi_dude (127)
India
February 17, 2009 6:31am CST
I had this friend(who is a girl) of mine and she has known a guy for 3-4 months and they are deeply in love with each other but they have not slept with each other. Her boyfriend keeps asking her to sleep with him threatening he would break-up otherwise which she keeps denying. He feels that having that will take their relationship to the next level which the girl feels is already on the highest level. What do you feel about the issue? Does first-time-sleep-with-each-other really matters that much and does it really take the love to next level or is it just fulfillment of materialistic desire
3 responses
@jajohn (31)
• India
17 Feb 09
Stay away with this kind of relationship that is demanding something, that if you don't meet, he will go away or break up with you. Isn't this very clear, that the guy only taking advantage of the girl.
I do feel pity that the girl has to come up with her senses. Better to break up as early as possible because the guy is not sincere in his love for you, he only wants to have physical contact with you.
Any one will never have happiness in love if a person sets a limit on something. Do this or that or else is the issue here, what kind of guy will say that to a girl if he really loves a person, he will love a girl unconditionally, not because she meet a certain condition, this guy is dictator ok. Hope you advice the girl to keep away from him and better asked the Lord and pray for His will, if not, why not do one thing, know God more in your life and seek Him first.
1 person likes this
@abhi_dude (127)
• India
17 Feb 09
I will certainly take heed to all your people's advice and give proper advice to my friend. The difficult part is how to explain her as she is so much in love with him and after his sustained asks for the same , she almost succumbed to him and went to his home on Valentine's day. God knows what happened then , she has yet to tell me, What do you think she should do now if they had slept togethor.
@dawon007 (184)
• India
17 Feb 09
It can be viewed as a materialistic desire of the boy. There are many incidents in which the girl falls to the boy and when she is found pregnant, he will leave her. Or in other cases even just after enjoying the intimacy, the boy will have a dread feeling about the girl and he will distance him from her. There are boys who think that- how can I trust a girl who broke the marriage principle. Can she not fall to another person after marriage? Here the boy is threatning her. This just means that the boy is not loving her as she loves him. Threats are one of the signs that he is not loving the girl. If you love a person will you ever threaten her for something that she doesn't approve of and which is considered as wrong in the soceity?
@abhi_dude (127)
• India
17 Feb 09
well said dawon007, your threatening logic is really convincing but if we leave this scenario apart, can we conclude that this action is always for materialistic desire. I feel that intimacy does take the relationship to another level where there is nothing to hide and the trust for reach other increases. Even in this case the boy may be doing this as a mark to test whether the girl has enough trust on him or not although to us it appears that chances of that are very low
@simpleyettough (22)
• Philippines
17 Feb 09
I have to admit that "doing it" in a relationship should come naturally. No one should be forced into doing this act of love against their free will and worst being threatened.
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