What would you do if you were in my shoes?
By chertsy
@chertsy (3798)
United States
February 24, 2009 4:56pm CST
Ever have something happen in your neighborhood that causes drama for everyone in it. Well, here's my situation from the beginning. I'm friends with two my neighbors and so are my kids. Well, the past two weeks, one of them have been putting trash into a trash can and not taking it out from a house that is up for sale. Well, the people that's trying to sell the home is related to the other friend. Upon the owners request, the one friend that hasn't been putting trash in the can took it out to the end of the road to be dumped. Well, by Monday it was full again. Now, the one friend that's related to the realtor went off and took a computer box out of the trash can and flung it on the others yard. Well, they turned around and put the box back into the trash can. Of course it went flying back into their yard. Now, I was at the house where the box came from and I saw it sitting on the coffee table.
Well, the realtor came by and took the trash to the end of the driveway and went to their house and told them that if they touch one foot on the property that she was going to file a police report. They were like we have no clue what your talking about. We haven't put trash in that can. The realtor was like Well, I personally found your name and address in the trash. Do you want to lie to me again.
I thought that was the end of it. Well, this morning my 6 yr old daughter asked their kid what was that in your yard. The girl was like that's the box that so and so flung in our yard. I said well don't you need to pick up your box. She was like that's not our box, it's so and so's. I told my friend what she said, and she called the mom and went off on her. Next thing I know she's like I didn't do it, that she saw her and me putting trash into this can.
Now I'm upset, I don't want to speak or go near the mom again. The crappy part is that Saturday is my youngest birthday and she invited this kid. Way before this all began. My question anyone that responds is Do I contact the mom to tell her that my kid won't be going over to her house again and no need for her to come to the party and my house again. Or do I keep my mouth shut and wait until after the birthday party so my daughter doesn't get hurt. Now if the kid doesn't show up Saturday, then the mom will get a ear full, because I'm going to go off on her.
So do I go off on the mom before or after the party? I could use any insight on this. Plus, I'm sorry that this is long, but this is also my vent.
1 person likes this
4 responses
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
25 Feb 09
I find this whole story confusing, he did what to whom, etc.
I don't understand why you ask should you invite the child and go off on the mom,
if you are going to go off on the mom,
do you mean to spite the children too?
then if you know you are going to go off on the mom should you invite the kid,
that seem hypocritical , while the other seems cruel to the children,
it is not an easy decision which ever one you make,
I am not telling you which way to go, I don;t understand the situation that much,
but if it was me personally I would just not bother with any of that crap and mind my own business,
I would not take sides and tell everyone that I was not getting into the middle of this, they can work it out for themselves, it is not me problem and I don't need al this hassle but that is me how I would handle it, you are a different person and you must make your own decision on which way you want to handle this.
1 person likes this
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
26 Feb 09
why not send a letter to everyone concerned and say what happened and say if they don't believe you when the proof was already found out by the police report than you don't need to bother with any of them, you do not need your friends to think of you that way when you are innocent in all of this.
@chertsy (3798)
• United States
26 Feb 09
The thing is the mom and the grandmother is telling that everyone in the neighborhood and myself are the ones that's done the wrong thing and that they are not to blame. My daughter invited their kid to her birthday party way before this happened, which is this Saturday. I'm upset that the mom is going around and saying it's not her, but me and someone else that's dumping their trash in someones trash can. Well, this morning the kid solved that issue for me. All the sudden she's going to another birthday party and only had an hour to come to my daughter's, so her mom doesn't want her to come here for an hour and then turn around to go to another kids.
I find it fishy, because we are walking distance from their house. I mean only across the street, so my daughter told the kid that's fine, that it won't hurt her feelings at all.
The whole problem started over my so called friend trespassing onto property to put her trash into the trash can. Then turning around and saying that I did it, when in the trash is their names and address's. The realtor filed a police report, because it's illegal to do this, especially a house that's for sale.
I'm mad at the mom and the grandmother because they are accusing me of doing this, even though they have been busted for doing it. I have never done anything towards them except for being nice and they do this. The whole birthday problem has been solved, because the kid isn't coming.
1 person likes this
@Spook619 (335)
•
24 Feb 09
I personally would wait until after the party, otherwise you run the risk of significantly weakening relations between your daughter and her friend which could currently act as a bridge to rebuild the friendship if you wanted to. However I don't think I'd want to rebuild the friendship, if the mom is willing to blame you for something which she was more or less red handedly caught doing she isn't worth being friends with.
To summarise... Ask your daughter if she still wants her friend there on Saturday, base your response on that.
1 person likes this
@chertsy (3798)
• United States
25 Feb 09
Well, I asked my daughter which is only 6 and of course she wants the kid to come. I mean what kid that doesn't want people to come to their party. I think after the party, I will call the mom and tell her that since she wants to tell everyone that I'm the one putting trash in other people's can's, that it would be best that our kids don't hang out with each other anymore. Then from now on, you will have to either get up earlier to get her kid on the bus, wait for the bus herself, or take her to school. That I won't be doing it anymore. I have been nice enough to let the child come into my home to wait for the bus when it has been cold. Well, I'm done, the kid is a irritating brat. She's loud and wakes my husband up, and numerous times of talking to her and her mom she still does it. Question on how to do this without going off on her, I don't know. The mom will more than likely turn this around to say that my other neighbor is lying that she didn't say that. In away I hope she does, because either way I'm done with that family.
I'm hoping the mom will come to our house with the child this Saturday, because my husband is upset that she dragged me into this. So no telling what he would say to her if she shows up. If the mom has brain cells left, she will know the neighbor she told that I did it to, is going to turn around and tell me what she said. That she should find another way to get her kid to school. What gets me after the realtor told her and her family to stay off the proerty, her kids walks through the property to her house after she gets off the bus.
@chertsy (3798)
• United States
26 Feb 09
Well, since this morning. I don't have to do anything. The girl isn't coming to the birthday party. All the sudden she's going to a boy's birthday party and since she could only stay here an hour, her mom didn't think it would be nice for her to come and then leave to go to the other party. What made me upset, was the mom didn't have the guts to tell me but have her kid do it.
My daughter said that's fine, I don't care if you come or not, it won't hurt my feelings. Hopefully, the kid won't come over tomorrow morning to catch the bus, because honestly. I'm tired of the whole family and this is a good way to end ties with them.
@underdogtoo (9579)
• Philippines
25 Feb 09
Trash is such a problem and people who don't know how to deal with their trash except to dump it on others are even more of a problem. What can one do?
1 person likes this
@online_jon (1476)
• Philippines
25 Feb 09
Hi to you. . . By the way before my response to your forum topic discussion. Will it be fine if i will add you to be my friend? Well if it is fine, thank you very much! Well regarding your forum topic discussion entitled "what would you do if you were in my shoes". I think if that will happened, i guess it will be accident because for me i never wear things that i did'nt borrow. What i mean is if ever i use a thing, i am very sure that i borrow it to the owner even though she/he is my relative because doing that thing! Borrowing with a permission was really good and not bad. . . And my mother and my father or what i mean is my parents tol me that by asking a permission when borrowing things you will earn good deed which is you will use in order to go heaven. . . Hehe lol. I think you really laugh too. . . Hehe. . . Because i only just write like a elemdntary student. . .hehe. . . lol well that's the end of my response in your forum topic entitled "what wotld you do if you were in my shoes". Happy earning to you my friend and happy posting! Good luck to our earning career in this site mylot.
@chertsy (3798)
• United States
26 Feb 09
You can add me to be your friend. Exactly, before you do something to something that doesn't belong to you, you ask for permission. Well, when it involves another persons' property, your breaking the law. Then to blame someone else, when your name and address is found on the property is plain stupid and childish. Especially a property, that sustained $500 dollars in property damage, not including a $500 dollar water bill, is extremely stupid.
I agree, earning permission when borrowing things you will earn good deeds, you would use in order to go to Heaven.
It's ok that you write like a elementary student, it was nice of you to respond to my discussion and thank you for it.
Happy Earning and posting to you as well.
