how do you usually solve problems in your realationship?

Hi, LISTENING. Thinking Laterally. Giving Alternatives! =Lahiri,Kolkata,India.

Talking it out usually, but if we cannot talk it out, then I walk out. If he will not listen to me and he just wants to make me angry, then I walk away. When he went to San Diego Comic Con, and he did nothing to earn it, I was angry! It wasn't fair! I had worked my butt off to go, I did everything in my power to earn as much money as I could to go, but because of certain circumstances I could not go, but my boyfriend, he did not do anything at all and he got to go. I was furious, and I told him. I was mad at him for days, but I got over it after I saw all of the things he brought back for me. Recently, we don't argue all that much, it's rare because we are trying to work together to get him away from his father and on his own two feet.

My husband and I have been married for 21 yrs, togehter for 26, so we have learned that it isn't worth it to fight over disagreements. We will just talk out our problems. Usually we discuss the pros and cons to find a solution. Regardless of who is right it doesn't matter as long as the problem gets solved and we aren't mad at each other over something silly.

hi jhl930, Perhaps, I think that majority in a relationship right now will say that they solve their problems by means of having a sincere talk with each other. Problems can easily be solve if both parties will be honest with what they feel. It is a must not to keep secrets from each other because it might just lead to misunderstandings.I and my boyfriend is spending more than a year on our relationship. We both experienced the good times as well as the bad times. But I am happy to tell that we have more happy times rather than bad times. I am in a long distance relationship and as much as possible I am trying to raise any arguments on us. Being in a long distance relationship is so difficult. One must have lots of patience and understanding. It is just sad sometimes that we cannot avoid to have arguments. And sometimes we cry both because of fighting.Sometimes, when I feel so bad, I just sign out immediately on my messenger so for us not to talk about the problem. Well, my boyfriend and I has big age difference. And I can say that I am so childish sometimes and very narrow minded. In times like that, he usually calls me on phone and keep on asking me what is the problem about.Whenever he is not that busy, he keeps to find solution to our problem within that moment. He not wants simple problem to be so complicated because of not talking about it.So far, we are not getting into arguments that both of us is so angry. Most of the times, he is the one who is calm and I am the one always angry. But even though, I still talk with him and try to fix problems whenever we got one.

1st i have to stay cool and i think about what made our relationship to this blocked road ... 2nd i need to speak to the partner to know why he is doing that .. 3d i have to discuss it ...

Well, m not come across with such big problem but what i personally feel that every relationship whether it girlfriend and boyfriend, husband and wife or bother and sister, if problem persists among them then one has to show politeness to other not only that you have to lower your tone and let just cool down the mind. Usually this things doesn't work but one has to take steps, if the desired steps are taken at the right moment then definitely the problem will be solved.

I think if I have a problem in a relationship, I would better sort it out through communication and conversing with the other fellow. I would like to know the real reasons of rift between us and would like to explain my side of the story. I have noticed that sometimes differences crop in because of some communication gap or misunderstanding and it is better to sort them out by discussing those matters. If one of the fellow keep mum, then problem may aggravate.

Go out, socialize more breath more fresh air outside. If you do this once in a while you inject lots of freshness to a relationship that has gone stale and problems start to creep in. Come back when you are fresh and inject new life to your relationship. All problems will slowly leave and your relationship will once more come back to a new chapter.

Me and my boyfriend butt heads alot of times. He have different opinions on alot of things. He never sets a time to do anything, its just like are you ready and im like where are we going i havent even taken a shower and that bugs me i want a set time to do things because i have other things going on. But most of the time its settled out and i hurry up and get ready and hes still mad but oh well thats life and hes with me. If we fight over other things most of the time its silly and we just talk it over and within the hour its over and through that hour we really dont talk and we do other things and then we usually end up in the same bed at night anyways so its not like were getting rid of eachother or anything.

I solve problems in my relationship in the following ways usually look the nature of the problem we are facing,if it is something that is not that serious i will called my partner and talk to her.

I do not want to persuade anyone to do what I do, but I do have to be honest with this question. This is not what I have done in the past but it works for me now. I have realized that I am not a mind reader, if I truly knew what to do it would be done and the problem would not exist. I do not readily see my own faults. It is much easier for me to see another person's faults. That really leaves me in a blind spot. So that means I can't see my faults, can't figure out what others are thinking, and can point out others faults easily. Talking helps to some degree, but we all leave things out of a conversation. Our hearts are so deep that it is hard to be honest with ourselves and no matter how close we feel to another person, we still tend to guard those deep deep things inside against others really knowing us. Where does this leave a person. You may not like my response but here it is. It dawned on me one day that if there is a God and He created all of us and He knows all things, then He also knows what is causing the friction in a relationship and He knows how to guide me around or through it. One day I asked God to help me to know what to do, help me to see myself through His eyes and the person I love through His eyes and give me a direction. Sometimes the answers don't seem to come. Sometimes they come very quickly and I sure don't want to deal with my part in it. If I wait, eventually I do get an answer. The answers seem to come quicker when I stomp on my pride (not my self worth) and I am willing to listen and learn. That does not mean that I don't ask many questions and debate with God. Many times I have asked God to help me to see what He is trying to get across to me. I tell Him it doesn't make sense to me and to help me understand. I tell Him I need His help. As for counseling, I have also learned that you don't just go to someone you think might be good for one reason or another. You must do your homework. This is a person who is supposed to have insight into your relationship, this is serious. I had one counselor tell us to divorce after speaking to my husband but would not give me the reason. I refused to return. Something just didn't seem right with all of this. I needed a reason. I have never heard the reason after almost ten years, but I prayed and asked God to give us a counselor after that. I refuse to let the negative thoughts of what caused this counselor to say this knaw at me. Most Christians go to Christian counselors without thought. After that prayer we ended up with a Jewish Counselor. It was a strange path that took us there but I will be forever grateful. Our marriage is still together and this counselor helped us out tremendously. By this point, I prayed for the counselor, my husband and myself before even stepping into each session to give us all insight. When I didn't understand some of the things the counselor said, I asked questions. If it doesn't seem right, ask questions. This counselor addressed us personally and helped us to communicate better as individuals. He helped me to be a better listener and showed me how I was jumping to conclusions and over a period of time how much my husband loved me. Prior to this I did a lot of negative talking about him and eventually convinced myself of all of his faults and no longer saw my husband as the man I fell in love with. Relationships are never easy because we can't do it on our own and it's a lot of work.

1 talking things out. honest communication. be patient with the tantrums that come with it. 2 getting advice from different people especially those who are really close to us, and weighing all the things they say which one's the best to take or follow 3 i read a lot of self help books 4 and my final solution is, accept the fact it will never be OK and it's time to let go of the relationship. of course this doesn't mean i'm no longer in love. I'm not saying you follow all the 4 things i listed here. just an idea. and just to answer your question. have a nice day! God bless you.

my husband and I sit down together and talk things out. It does usually start with us fighting but we try t respect each other and work through it.

we sometimes treat each other as you,but we try our best to control us.at the first,we don't know why and how we have to do that, but gradually, we find that the situation we are in just because our behavior and thought.so we start to change ourself, to control ourself, to do so, just because we love each other and try to do our best to let him/her feel happy,as what we had said at the very begining.may be you can try this way!

My husband and I talk things out. It is very important to iron out things. If we had discussions, well, it is normal only to married couples. But never did we have heated arguments or physical fights.

In our case, we usually talk it out. we don't pass the day or go to bed without talking it out. It helps in a relationship if you have a good communication. Even if it end with a fight at least we expressed what we wanted to say and we hear our partner what he wanted to say to us. once it is over/resolved we dont usually talked about it anymore.

My boyfriend and I usually solve our relationship problems by talking about it. It all starts with a fight, silence, and the talking over. The fights are always about me because there were some things that I do not want to tell my boyfriend so that he will not be worried. For some miracle, he always finds out about my problems will make him worry. I hate it when he finds out, but I love it that he does find out because it makes me and him feel better, and we also seem to get closer that way.

I normally try to talk things out with me fiance although at time that doesn't work which most of the time it does. I'm the type that is a very takative person and so is he. There are times when talking don't fix the problem and we just get into a huge arguement.

Listening, patience, listening, communication, more listening, more communication and a whole lot of self control! ;-)

Dear friend,ya its true that we end up in fights if we talk to solve problems.but you have to remember one thing when you talk to solve your problems.you are talking to your loved ones.If you remember this you ll not tend to argue too much and there ll be less chances to fight.you ll always tend to get the feeling that you ll always need them.