divorced parents vs. unity candle

I have never in my life heard of such a thing. The unity candle symbolizes the union of your lives. Not your families'. My husband and I had one in our wedding ceremony. (That's him and our daughter in the pic) You put the unity candle, unlit, in the center. On either side of it, you place a single lit taper candle. Each of the two tapers represents you and your fiancee. Each of you takes your candle (at the same time) and lights the unity candle. Then, once lit, you blow them out, leaving the unity lit. This signifies the fact that the two of you have gone from having two single lives into one joined life together. Like I said, it has absolutely NOTHING to do with whether or not your (or his) parents are married. It has NOTHING to do with anything or anyone but you. Don't worry. Do what you want. You will not look stupid if you have the candle in your wedding. I think it is a very beautiful idea (which is why I had one LOL). Anyway, I hope that I have been helpful. Good luck to the two of you. I hope God blesses you every day of your life together.

I really don't see any problem in having one. A unity candle is lit to bring unity to the family, so in your case with having so many issues about getting married this could be a good thing. As with most unity candles the mother of the bride and the mother of the groom light the small tapers, and then the bride and groom pick up them and light the big one. Only issue you may have would be if there was step mothers. Every wedding is different and special in it's own way, so for the sake of not leaving anyone out, have the mothers and step mothers do the lighting together.

I wish you all the luck in the world and hope that your marriage is going to be strong and fruitful. Cheers!!

When my brothers got married they lit each candle next to the unity candle and then lit the unity candle together, blew the others out, then they where married. It's a symbolic thing that shows you both that your one now and not two. It has nothing to do with your parents. It's just for you guys to share a private symbolic moment telling each other that you are both joined together now. It's your wedding and you make it how you want it to be. Good luck and many happy years of marriage.

I say do it no matter what your family says!

My step daughter is getting married April 4th. We have step parents, too. Her real mother passed away unexpectantly so her father and I will light a candle for her and her husband to be's father and step-father and going to walk with his mother and they are all three going to light the unity candle that represents him. His step-father has been a very important person in his up bringing. Most step-parents don't get the credit they deserve. This is (like everyone else has said) your wedding and however you choose to do it will be beautiful and special. Congratulations!!!!!

Our candles were already lit when we came in, so that my divorced parents wouldn't have to light the one together. When it came time for us to light the unity candle, we just took the two candles that were already lit, and lit ours. That way no one was stuck in the middle of anything.

okay. so this is your wedding. if you want the mothers to light the unity candle then let them. this is your wedding megan. you will not look stupid. okay;have you ever seen a redneck wedding on the comedy channel? yea. so no you wont look stupid. you decide if its what you want and do it or dont. i have learned so far that you cannot please everyone. besides this is your and james' day not everyone elses. so if you dont think you should do the parents candle and still want to do something involving the mothers then i have heard of brides that carry two roses. on her way in she stops and hands her mother a rose. on her way out she stops and hands the grooms mother a rose. what ever you decide to do just let it be your decision. i know it will be perfect no matter what you decide.