bipolar disorder

you are not alone with bipolar in this world. i have the worst kind of bipolar and i am living proof you can have a normal life. you need to be determain to want it, and willing to work super hard at it. the thing i tell people one you admit to it, first step. then getting a doctor who you like, as well as a therpist. also anger mangagment is good to. and you have to be open about everything well going to see these people. if you put in 100% into it, you will get out 200%. finding the meds that works is one of the harder part. but once you get them and work hard at dealing with life, and facing things that is either happening or did happen in your life is a big plus. when i tell people i have bipolar and suffer from pmd they kind freak out, but when i tell them i've been off meds for about 4 yrs now. in four years i had two outburst and dealt with my depression maybe a few times. as far as wanting to kill myself i've been as well, but seeing reasons why i don't want to die helps, one of your main reason is and should be for your children. i've lost friends due to my bipolar, but i found out who my real friends are and who in my family matter the most to me. i also rebuilt my faith in God as well. finding the right people to be there for you is hard as well. i used to tell people i don't want you to understand but to except me and my illness. i used to think lord this is a cruiss or something, but i found it to be a blessing because of bipolar i am a much better person then i ever was. as you go to therpy and see your doctor, need to let them know if the meds are working or not, but once you start seeing things from the pass and now, you work on one thing, then you are working on something to improve your life. but be strong, and have faith. you will be on the right track. it take time for sure. and if those feeling come back wanting to die, remember your child and have that be your number one reason wanting to live, and the reason to work hard to get yourself to that good point once again to get your child back. it's not going to be easy, i would be lying if i said it was going to be. but detarnation and will power you can do it. best of luck to you with this battle and often will seem like a war.