Such hateful son ,who to blame?

There's actually no one to blame but your Antie Nanny as well. She brought up her kid and spoiled him. If she could say NO to him each time he visits to get money from her, he'll soon realize that she's not some bank he could just withdraw some funds in. On the other hand, that's how mothers are, and that's how mothers are taken forgranted. I just hope that son of hers would soon see the value of his mom, not just monetarily. If I were you, I'd set up a fund for my Antie Nanny, a fund where most of her money goes for her old age so that the son won't get anything right now because it's locked in there. Try to talk to your Antie Nanny about it, she would need some funds when she's older because obviously this son and his wife who doesn't care much of her now (except her money) would obviously not care at all when she's already old and can't earn for herself. Wish her luck and blessings.

Both mother and son are to blame. Your nanny is to blame because she should not have follow your son's wishes all the time, she should have taught him manner since he was a kid and she should have put down her foot more for her son's behaviour. Her son is to blame because ... what the? What kind of a man is he to take money from his mom and treat him badly? Didnt he know that we are supposed to honour our parents?? One more thing, other than behaviour problem, there might be problem such as old wounds in the relationship between mother and son. Maybe Nanny has done something wrong or soemthing that hurt her son emotionally when he was a kid, and her son just never forgive her... Either way, the relationship needs to be patched up.