Would You Want To Be Where Or Who You Were......

I have been in different situations all my life... but all along... my degree of hapiness did not change. It has not been great... but it has not been bad either. I had my up and down like everyone else... but nothing bad enough to hurt me. When things get tough... I just get tougher and get myself out of the situation. If you had asked me 10 years ago... I would have said that there would be no way I would want to start again. Today as I get older... if I was getting the chance to be 20 again... I would take it. However... there is no point of starting again if you are going to make the same mistakes. So it comes back to the old say "I would like to be 20 again... while knowing what I know today". I cannot think of a period of my life which was better than another. So I am quite happy to stay where I am right now.

I would not go back to the time when I lived with my parents for anything in the world, some people should not have children and my parents are two of those people. My mother was especially nasty to me and I did not realize that what she did for all those years was downright abusive until I was in my late thirties. Up until then I bought into her put downs and blamed myself for her miserable existence. After that "awakening" I still nursed my low self esteem and went from relationship to relationship looking for God knows what. I would not want to go back, now I have the life I have always wanted and I am doing what I am passionate about and I can see my parents as they really are. Having said that I feel I still have a long way to go. There have been other crises as there often is in life but I know and like myself a lot more now and I no longer blame myself for my dysfunctional family life. There are still days when I think,” So this is the future I've been waiting for...I'm here...Oh, God is that all there is?"One look in my little daughter's eyes and I know I am home and whatever is going on now with me, it will be alright, I've come through the other side.

Hi pye, What a thought provoking topic! In some areas of my life, yes, while in others, no. By this I mean, ten years ago my daughter was just little, and I really felt she needed me, on a much different level than now. I also was enjoying much better health, so that's my 'yes side.' On the 'no side,' while I wouldn't mind going back even twenty years, to when I met my 'late' husband, I wouldn't want to go through the grief and loss that followed, not many years later. I hope you're doing well. Drop me a line sometime, if you have a bit of spare time, so we can catch up. Take care. Hugs

Boy this post is unreal. You have described my life to a T although my mother is still out there someplace probably as miserable as ever. Don't know, don't care. I'm done with the whole dam issue my family is right here. I have 200 people on my friends list which is about all I can keep up with given my health issues. This is where I am most happy right here at myLot!!!Thank You my friend and enjoy the weekend!!!

Personally, I wouldn't want to be who I was five years ago. I've grown a lot since then. I'm definitely not perfect, I've made my share of mistakes, but I do believe that I'm a better person. I don't think I'd want to go back to five years ago. Would I have wanted to know five years ago what I know now? Sure, but the fact is that's never really the case. All I can really do is to keep learning and to keep growing.

No I am quite happy as I am living in the present,I would like to go back for certain days or times when the kids were born,my wedding day but not to stay there long.My life just gets better day by day,but I know what you mean.

Boy ya must be coming down with something lol. Boy to go back 20 years I would have Hubby with me! We would still be traveling and having a ball doing it . But I can go back in my mind anbd relive it all when I want too.

No... although my life has been relatively happy and I've been free to make my own decisions and conduct my life in basically, the way I want to, I would never want to turn back time. I learned lessons from those times, made mistakes, and moved on, correcting the mistakes and filing the lesson for future reference. I've grown spiritually with time, and there's nothing I need to go back for. The future is all we have to reach our goals, my friend, and turning back is just wasting our precious time on this earth. Brightest Blessings.

I want to go back 10 years ago. I would have filed for Divorce from my now ex husband. I would have had an abortion as I was pregnant at the time with my second child and would have kicked my then husband out. I stayed way too long. Now that he filed for divorce and it is final, I am worse off, no job, no money, nothing.

5 years ago, I was a lot happier than I am right now. I would have just started dating my soon to be ex husband. And that first year and half with him was great. He was everything I wanted and could have asked for. I was still in school with all life and possibilities in front of me. Life was Grand then. Somewhere along the way, he or I changed. Now, he has filed for divorce, I can't get a job enough to support myself where I am currently and I gave up my schooling to support him while he went to school, and I am coming up on some hard decisions. Life has its ups and downs I supposed and I am strong and will come out alright on the other end of this.

I liked the job I had before the state moved me to the Health Dept, and my friend was alive. If I could go back 15 years that would be good.

It's too early in the morning for me to think about such things... but I know I've made some bad decisions in my life and if I could go back and change them, maybe I would.

Hi pyewacket! I do understand you my friend. The end of the chapter of your life with your mother is like being reborn again. However, it is a different story for me my friend. Sometimes, I just wish to go back to the time when my mother was still alive, 20 years ago. I am more secured and happier with her by my side. I still wish that she is still here holding me whenever I am sad or have a problem. I am happy when I got married but wished she was there to see me exchange vows with my husband. Take care and have a great day! lovelots..faith

well, for me it would have to have been about twenty five years ago when I was 33 years young. I was 130 pounds and married. I was working for a large corporation and making very good money. I drove a brand new car and had all the very latest clothes. My hair was very long and had no grey in it. It was a quite a different time and things were happier.

Personally looking back, there is NO WAY I would want to be where I was before now. Even if there are times in my life where I might have maybe thought I had a better job, etc. the things I have learned in the process thru this makes me who I am today. And with some of the many Health Issues I have had to deal with over time, I feel I am better off now than before as well. Yes, there are things I wish I could change, or things I would have done differently but I am Happy with where my life is now, and it is up to me and God what happens from here as well.

I still would want to be where I am now, but I'd love the opportunity to travel back to five different times in the past 10 years to change some things. I'd go back to 1999 and make sure that my Mom had sufficient life insurance. Then I'd go back to 2001 and when the kids wanted me to pay some of their bills I would have said NO!!! Then I would go back to 2004 and when they wanted to move in with me then I again would have told them NO. And finally in 2007 when they wanted to "visit" for a few days it would have been another huge NO!!! That of course would be providing that I know then what I know now. My life would have changed a lot if I had kept that two letter word in the forefront of my mind. It may sound heartless, but for those of you that have followed what happened with my daughter and her family, you would totally understand. For those who don't know, it amounts to the "family" destroying my car, running up my expenses, causing my dog to be put to sleep, and causing me enormous fines through my home owner's association. It also includes the fact that I didn't have ANY RIGHTS in my own home, even though I was paying 90% of the bills. I couldn't tell the grand daughters that they couldn't do things, I had no rights to MY television, and the list could go on for pages. Right now, I am trying to get the money together to buy a car. The one that I bought to replace the one the kids totaled got repossessed because I had to make huge payments on the electric bill so it wouldn't be shut off. The electric went up from $38 (max) a month to over $125 a month. I also had to pay the fines to the home owners association so that I wouldn't be forced out of my home. The kids seem to think it's funny that they owe my daughter's husband's mother three cars (which HE totaled) so it must be just as funny that they owe me two. (One had the engine blown in 2004, my daughter was driving that one) I did some figuring and the four times that they stayed with me has run totally over $120,000 in rent, food, utilities, damages, vehicles (and use of the vehicles) and having to put my dog to sleep. I admit I am a very slow learner...but after they stayed with me those times, last November I got an email from my daughter telling me how horrible a Mother I am and that I should have aborted her when I found out I was pregnant with her...or put her up for adoption etc. It was such a wonderful "thank you" for allowing them to stay with me and my taking the heat for their stupidity. I never did receive a "thank you for allowing us to stay with you" from them...and I realized just not that I don't want one and I don't want them under my roof again. I am happy with the person I am now, and I did learn a lot through the past ten years. I wouldn't want to relive them for anything...nor would I want to relive my whole life. I just would love to set straight the few problems I mentioned.

HOPE Im glad you hang on to it. Maybe that is the last thread that is keeping you from loosing your mind. FAITH, HOPE, and LOVE.

I wouldn't want to repeat any time in my life I don't think. If I had to go back to do so I'd want to change the future. My marriage to my ex was a nightmare. No way do I want to relive any part of that. But, if I could go back 27 years to the first time I left him I would divorce him, rather than take him back. Maybe my life would then be so much different. Its possible my health might not even be so bad. Doctors have said the stress from my abusive marriage compromised my health. Maybe if I'd divorced him way back then I wouldn't be sick? We'll never know. I think we all look back on our lifes and think of such things. I also remember how I turned down the chance of an education for my new marriage. Stupid stupid stupid. I wanted to be an architect. I was told I was "gifted" in that area. But I passed up my chance for a husband and family. These days I try not to look back too much. Because I see too many mistakes, and alot of lessons learned. Now my focus is on my present and future. I find it much more enjoyable to look forward.

Our life is changing everyday,it's moving on forward. There's no time to wait and stay idle. Time is moving fast. Life nowadays are full of problems. Do I need to escape it or go through it all. But the pattern is emerging, our destiny is woven from the moment we are born till the day we are gone. As for me, i will savor it's experience like no other, because I will not be going back. All I have is the memories to keep me company.

I have a happy and fulfilling life, but my health is not good. I would like to be like I was 5 years ago, when I was still healthy, fit and thin. But in my personal life (marriage, home life, etc), I am happier now than I have ever been. In fact, as time passes I get more and more content. If only my health would cooperate!