how do i get past this aweful divorce?
By 86steelers43
@86steelers43 (167)
United States
March 8, 2009 6:49pm CST
my husband left me and our 2 year old daughter a year ago. he walked out on us several times but i always took him back because i loved him. we were going to be evicted last april b/c he didn't pay the rent. i was forced to move back to my mother's with my two daughter's b/c there was nowhere else for me to go.
he kept in contact w/ me every few weeks to see me and his daughter. the time in between the visits got shorter and shorter. on july 25th, '07 he called me at 1 am and told me he wanted to talk to me. he came over and told me he wanted me and his family back no matter what. he ended up staying the night. the next morning he left to go to work and i didn't hear from him until the middle of august.
i found out he was sleeping w/ his "best friend" for quite awhile and it broke my heart. when i confronted him about it, i was served divorce papers. i took him for child support and for full custody of our daughter. things worked out in my favor b/c he is an alcoholic and was just charged w/ his 2nd dui and will be doing some jail time.
even though he has hurt me over and over again, i am still in shock over all that has happened and i need a way to get him out of my head and get on w/ my life. i have met some great guys over the past few months that have really taken an interest in me, but i am more scared than anything to get involved with someone b/c i don't want to be hurt again. my kids are my priority, but i need to be happy at the same time.
has anyone gone through this themselves? if so, please share how you coped w/ the pain of losing the one man you loved the most and thought you were going to spend thr rest of your life with...looking forward to hearing from you and your advice!
2 responses
@rsa101 (38189)
• Philippines
9 Mar 09
I guess you are right in your decision of not just jumping at the first opportunity of relationship with your suitors. I think what you need first is to be healed first from the wounds that was created by your ex-husband. Learn what is to be learned from the past experience you have in your life with him and then when you know what was the message behind those past then you can finally say you can move on with your life. You are right to say you deserve to be happy too and when opportunity knocks it is really hard to just to ignore them just like that. So I say try what you have learned from the past and use this as a tool or test for this guys who got interested in you. Make sure you won't repeat your mistakes from the past.
@86steelers43 (167)
• United States
9 Mar 09
well thank you very much for the advice. i am definately learning from this horrible experience and taking everything slowly~not just for me but for my daughters as well. thanks again!
1 person likes this
@rsa101 (38189)
• Philippines
9 Mar 09
You are most welcome there and hopefully you can make the past as past and move forward with life with less baggage in your life so that you can move on with life easily.
@van_city10 (89)
• Canada
9 Mar 09
I really dont think you can force yourself to get over it...I think time is really the only way of getting past something like this.
@86steelers43 (167)
• United States
9 Mar 09
it's just so difficult thinking of the good times while thinking of the bad...i try to focus on the bad, but that doesn't always help. thank you for the response! time is a healer!
