ever been taken for granted?

I am not married yet, but I am in a 3 year relationship. We have been through the hard times, i mean literally the HARD times. But, sometimes, I just... I feel I am not appreciated or I am TAken for granted. I don't usually get Thank You a lot and when I do, i really did something really that Big for him. But with the small things I do, i just get dismissed. Everytime I try to tell him that I feel like I am taken for granted. well, he said that "its just in my head" ohhh well, what can I do? :(

Hi, kayefedilo21! I am very sorry that you are being taken for granted in your marriage. I have been in your shoes many times. But now, my husband eyes are opened and he sees that I am really good to him. He loves me and he appreciates everything that I do for him. I can see it in his eyes. When my husband does not appreciate me, I will tell God about it and how it is hurting me. I will pray about it and let God know that I can't deal with being placed on the back burner. He will have to allow my husband to love me the right way, or I am gone. I can tell that you love your husband, and I am very sure that he knows this. But, he should not take you for granted because he never knows when he may need you. You many be the one that he will eventually call upon. I hope that he starts seeing you for what you are worth. Every woman who does right by their man, needs to see this. A sweet comment is all that you desire. You are a very good woman. Keep being this way, no matter how much your heart feels like it is broken in two. I will ask God as of now, to open up your husband's eyes so that he can really see you for the true woman that you are. I hope that he does not wait too late to see you for what you really are, his loving wife. He also needs to refrain from saying any kind of hurtful words to you, you don't deserve that. You desrve to be treated with the best love in the whole wide world. Take care!

Hi, welcome to My Lot. Yes, I think a lot of us know this feeling. Men think different then we do. They don't see anything wrong with there actions. That is why we women need to make ourselves clear. We need to let them know they are making us feel like we are being taken for granted. Let them know your feelings. Men don't mean to be like this. But, when we don't communicate correctly, this is what happens. Putting yourself at last place is not good either. You need to respect yourself first before you can expect respect from others. I learned this the hard way, but it is so true. Advise: Get some goals back for you. If you don't respect and love yourself, how do you expect others too. I was like you. I was so lonely. Talk to your husband, and don't be angry if he does not understand right away. He will understand. Some people are not fair, they leave there husband, and when the divorce is final the man gets told he took her for granted. When the wife does not say anything and the man thinks all is well, how does this make things better? Please, try to talk more. Respect yourself more, and you will get more respect. This is the way I see it. Take care.

In a way I'm lucky because my husband lost his late wife suddenly to cancer when she was 50 years old after 32 years of marriage. He knows how precious life is and, because of the terrible loss he suffered, he never takes me for granted. Every day that we are together...every day that we get to spend with the people we love is precious to us.

Hi kayefedilo, i totally agree with your views. However i can tell you that many husbands are like that of yours. They take their wives for granted, more so when the wife is a MERE housewife,not bringing in any money into the household, little realising the responsibilities and the work involved in managing the house.They feel that they are doing a great favor by feeding, clothing and looking after their wives , who in turn should remain obedient and do as they say.I feel that you should make him realise your feelings by discussing it with him, he might appreciate you a little more in the future..

maybe he makes up in other ways. that is the reason why we should always do what we love. i mean, in hurtful situations we should never say i gave up this and that for this and that. that was your decision and any regrets that accompanies your decision should've been foreseen before your took the plunge. if you know who you are, what you have, what you're worth no amount of put downs should discourage you even if the hurtful words come from your husband whom you know loses his little screw or gets it loose every now and then. cheer up!

Well, I think you and your husband needs to talk seriously about that. There's nothing like a good conversation and pray that things will end up well. Seems like you're taken for granted a lot. If your husband really loves you, tell him that you could use a little appreciation on the things that you've done for him and ask him what would it be like if you're not doing it to him, maybe that would help him realize how big your part is to his life. It's not healthy having that kind of relationship 'cause obviously you're being emotionally abuse and it's not helping you character and personality wise to be in that kind of relationship. Time to defend and stand up for yourself.

Many times I am taken for granted. when there is something my family think the need for children, it is taken for granted I will buy them.Also when there is many work to do, suddenly, it is taken for granted I will manage all.

yup... its a unfair feeling! isn't?

I was once taken for granted by my first bf thats why we only lasted for couple of months. and now, im so happy with my boyfriend whose been with me for 6 years already. weve been a lot of hardships from petty fights to painful breakups but we always end up back in each others arms. i could say that there are times when you take things for granted but doesnt really mean that you dont care for that person but maybe that the irony of life. i think its just part of having relationship. but most of the time, i always feel that i am loved by my boyfriend and also by my family!

I have a great way to avoid being taken for granted! I avoid being any use whatsoever, and because we live in a selfish, utilitarian society, nobody loves me.

honestly, there were times when i was taken for granted by my boyfriend due to his busy schedules and loads of works to accomplish..sometimes i cant help but pity myself for times i feel so neglected...that even a simple text message from him just to say hi is too hard for him to do..but then all i can do is to understand..and because of that we're still together..and that is because understanding never fades in our relationship..

Hello, I am not married but I have a report for 7 years!. You know you are right it is very ugly to do everything for their partners and not be "rewarded" with not even a thank you. This must be a very daunting situation. I think you should talk with your partner and say what makes you feel sick, the sialogue is important, you often have to give everything for granted is bad but you do not even want.

dear friend husbands r like that only , my hubby always finds me wrong , 3 years back i requested him to buy a house he refused that time & till now v r living i a reted house

I am also not married,but long for it in near future.I am in a relationship with my boyfriend for several months,in fact we know each other for seven years,we were classmates during the high middle school,and we are going to marry within this year. When the temperature is calefactive outside,we decide to take some special wedding photos in advance,that time ,I will show them for sharing with all the people here.Wish everybody has happy life ,so do I.My boyfriend love me much more than I love him. And I would like to choose him as my husband with all my life.