What will you do if you find out that you are not a real son or daughter?

Hi Zedlav23, I know first hand what that feels like...for a long time, up until the age of 11 or 12 I thought my parents were my parents and they weren't...that hurt soooooooooooo much and I was very angry for a long time, sometimes I still am. Just the knowledge that my biological parents didn't want me was enough to affect my self esteem negatively...it still bothers me to a certain degree and I am 56...I was 6 months old when they abandoned me:-( But I guess there are worse things that could have happened to me:-) I say to parents that are adopting, please, please tell the child the truth and let them know how much they care for them. ~G~

Hi,zedlav,this is a very interesting topic,but i have thought about that before,because there are many similar things around me.Sometimes,somebody will regardless of the feelings of his foster parents' and do sth that hurts them very much ,someone even abandons his foster parents to find out his own parents.All these practises ,i think they are wrong.NO matter what happened,the foster parents are the benefactor who have brought you up hardly,they love you though you are not their real son,this is really a great love in the world,so,you should respect ,love and support them without any complaint.The most important thing is that they love you heartly and brought you up,if they are your real parents are not important any more.Certainly,i'm so lucky that i have my real parents and we live a happy life,they love me and i love them very much. Imagine that,if one day i find out that they are not my real parents,i won't do anything hurt them,on the contrary,i will love them more forever.Parents are great to their children,as children,we should love them whether they are real or not.

Hello zedlav. I have never thought of that because I know that my parents are my real ones. They love me as well as I love them. But if it so happened that I were adopted, I would still love them as much because of their taking the trouble to have brought me up and they would be still regarded as my real parents as always. I love my parents forever. Thank you for the discussion. Good day to you.

The thought is really scary. Practically, I know it will never happen because I've seen enough evidences of the fact that I'm a real son. In a hypothetical situation, if I come to know of it as this age,i.e. 23 years, it would really hurt me. That I am not a real son would not hurt me much but the fact that my parents did not mention it to me at an earlier age would make me really sick. The love that the parents bestow upon a child would not change but still, the child would feel isolated. Hence, in my opinion, it is better to sit down with the child somewhere in his late teens and explain it to him in a very harmonized conversation. Teenagers above the age of 15 are mature enough to understand these things and I am sure if explained in a rightful manner, they will appreciate it.

oh , my god , i have never think of it , i grow up under my parents love, if one day i find i am not a real son , first of all , i will be very very sad, after that , i think i can calm down ,and do what i should do , and treat my parents as before ,because i have love them for years. enjoy mylotting, welcome to my discussions!!