Relationships: When it hurts so bad......why does it feel so good?
By kbriaa
@kbriaa (9)
United States
March 25, 2009 9:20pm CST
Im in a relationship with someone. He does things that hurts my feelings a lot and makes me sad. BUT.
At the same time he makes me laugh, feel loved, feel good, and just feel happy.
I know that I love him and he loves me. I'm constantly wondering if love is suppose to hurt and if I need to let him go.
If anybody knows what I am talking about, please describe your relationship and how things are going and/or what happened.
I feel like I can't come to a resolution because his pros is equal to his cons.
4 responses
@phoenix79 (302)
• United States
26 Mar 09
People are coming up with killer first post. I love your topic. It is so true it seems like people are attracted to the people that are doing them the worse. It is not just the people that you are with friends can be just as bad for you. I think the problem that people run into is that it is harder to say no to someone that you are with.
@kbriaa (9)
• United States
28 Mar 09
Phoenix..... What a revelation!! That makes so much sense to me because I think I have been with my "Baby-Boo,"(nicknames! don't you just love them) for the longest and I see what my girl-friends go through trying to find the right guy and I'm afraid to have to get back out there. They guy I'm with isn't a wrong guy, but the way he makes me feel sometimes.... just isn't right! My mind knows this, but my heart doesn't want to let go.
@xtedaxcvg (3189)
• Philippines
4 Apr 09
I guess this is because you love him too much. A relationship isn't all happy endings. A stable relationship is where both of you stood the test of time with hardships and obstacles. You can't feel joy unless you've experienced pain. Doesn't it feel good to hug your partner after a fight?
@angela_allen (406)
• United States
26 Mar 09
Those are lyrics from a Lauryn Hill song "When it Hurts so Bad", btw. Hmmm that is a really tough one. One reason it feels so good IMO is because its exciting not knowing if the person is going to love you back or not. When a guy gives you his undivided attention and professes his love it can be quite dull. On the other hand if he does things that show he is not 100% there for you it makes you want him even more.
I had the same problem with a guy I was dating...solution I married him. I am not saying that is what you should do just sharing my story. My husband and I are happily married now for 3 years this July and are expecting our 1st child in October. He does sometimes still do things that hurt, but we work on those things and I can't think of the last bad day I had with him.
As long as its not something like abuse (physical or emotional) or cheating, it is probably worth it to stay with him if you are in love.
@kbriaa (9)
• United States
28 Mar 09
Thanks angela for responding. Your view has helped because it's soo easy to give up on something, like a relationship, when you experience pain. Congratulations on your marriage and the bond of 3 years. I guess love just hurts sometimes and I have to be able to stand strong. By the way, I was listening to Lauryn Hill's song when I was writing this. HAHA
