How long would you wait for an incarcerated spouse ?
By ronnyb
@ronnyb (6113)
Jamaica
April 6, 2009 9:03pm CST
Perhaps the most famous and well documented case of waiting for a spouse in prison was Winnie Mandela who waited for 27 years for her incarcerated husband.
Now do you think you could have done something like this or would you finally give up after a while ?.Maybe you would start out with the most sincere of intentions but after a few sleepless nights and seeing all your friends with their spouses, you would finally give in especially when you are being tempted by so many willing lovers.
So the question remains how long would you be willing to wait for a spouse who was incarcerated ? Are there extenuating circumstances like if you believed that they were incarcerated unjustly ? However what if you thought they were just imprisoned would you feel that you shouldn’t be paying for their own folly and seek to sample some of the aforementioned treats (other lovers )In addition wouldn’t you use the Winnie Mandela example to say that you don’t want to spend your time waiting on anyone who might discard you for someone else when they are eventually released ?
Thanks in advance for your response
7 people like this
14 responses
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
7 Apr 09
This is a good discussion ronnyb! If we are talking about my one true love and he was incarcerated for something I believe he didn't do, I would wait forever if I had to all the while fighting to get him out because I know if the situation was reversed he would be there for me. If my partner was guilty, it would change things; firstly it would depend on the crime and the circumstances surrounding it. To be honest if he had purposely broken the law I can't say for sure that I would be there for the duration.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
7 Apr 09
thank goodness, that's one road i didn't go down. i think it would depend on what they were in for & if i thought they were innocent. i can't see myself being faithfull to a child abuser, rapist or anything like that. if that's why they were in i think i'd do anything in my power to keep them there.
@sarahruthbeth22 (43143)
• United States
26 Apr 09
This all depends. It depends on the charge , if he were guilty or inn ocent? If I loved him? And how long the sentence was. Let's say I love him and he was innocent of the charge. I wouldn't wait, I would break him out of jail. I would be his Bonnie to his Clyde. or if he had molested a child,I would let him rot. He would get the divorce papers in the jail,But if I didn't love him, and it was a white collar crime like embezzlement, I would wait but I wouldn't be alone, In other words I would have lovers.See it all depends.
@sanuanu (11235)
• India
8 Apr 09
Well, the best would be not letting my partner do anything so that she could go away from me for that long time.
I don't think I can wait for 27 years. I can't even wait for 27 months you know. It would be difficult and I don't think I am strong enough to take care of my children alone, I would need someone with me.
Sad but true!
@suzzy3 (8341)
•
8 Apr 09
Romatically waiting for ever is something we would all like to think we would do.If he has gone in prison for that long what on earth would he have done.?If he had murdered someone who had hurt one of our kids or grandchildren,then I would wait for him no matter how long he was in prison for.As I cannot imagine my husband ever doing anything wrong it is very hard for me. I suppose I would like to say yes but how on earth do you really know.People change so much .people get lonely and why should I think that I am a special case.My Gran lived for twenty five years alone after my grandad passed away,all I can say is real love is supposed to over come anything,lets just hope the situation never raises its head.love suzzy3
@maygodblessu44 (7336)
• India
12 Apr 09
Hello my friend ronnyb Ji,
So nice of you for starting examplary topic. But i would restrict my response to remain
confined to 'Examplary' . Winnie Mandela and personalities like her are example. Everyone
can never be example. May God bless you and have a great time.
@barehugs (8973)
• Canada
7 Apr 09
How long would you wait for a spouse who murdered his last partner? What about a spouse whom you know is guilty as Hell? You would be NUTS to wait even one day! Winnie did a few deeds herself that were pretty shady. If Nelson hadn't been in jail he might have been tempted to leave her. Its a good question, and there is no one answer.
@sudalunts (5523)
• United States
7 Apr 09
If I knew for certain that my husband was innocent, I would wait. Love shouldn't run away when trouble comes, you should stick it out. I know a case of a man that was sent to prison for a crime, and he did not do it, because he was at my house at the time of the crime. It was a matter of he say she say, and the jury was not paying attetion to the facts. He went to prison for five years, and his girlfriend waited for him, because she knew that he was not guilty. We all were meeting together the night of the crime to go to a party, he was no where near the crime scene.
So, my answer is, if I knew for certain my spouse was innocent, I would wait.
@TessWhite (3146)
• United States
7 Apr 09
I don't think I'd be one to wait 27 years on someone. But, I really don't think I'd stay married to anyone who did a crime that sent them to prison. Especially if it was violence against another person or animal. I suppose if he simply stole by messing with the books I might consider forgiving them. But someone who killed another I could not forgive. I'd divorce them immediately.
@mariposaman (2959)
• Canada
7 Apr 09
I guess it depends on how much of a jerk the person is. If the relationship was rocky that would be a deal breaker.
Judge Joe Brown said on his TV show, if you want to know where all the really attractive women are just go down to the penitentiary on visiting day. Women really like the bad boys and some women even go for the incarcerated type that are already in jail, so anyone who says they will not wait might be deluding themselves.
27 years and they ended up separating anyways because Winnie turned out to be a crook.
@minniemadz (499)
• Philippines
7 Apr 09
Forever? Yes, I understand I won't be able to know how it feels if I am really at those shoes. But for now, I should say, that I would be waiting forever.
@pyrozilla (41)
• United States
8 Apr 09
I feel what I would end up doing is wait maybe up to one year,other than that it would depend on the reasons they got locked up in the first place. If my spouse was locked up for something like murder I wouldn't wait at all. I know i'm the type of person who would just walk away and start my life over
