How to trust again after they've cheated

everybody experiencing ups and down even though you already give your best shot still you don't know what you done wrong?and thing's fell down into crash!I got a long time relation ship before i got married we last for 3 years i though our relation ship was perfect!but what i know least is he is a two timer!too late for me to know i already give up everything for him!i feel like i been cheated that i am damn stupid!but what i realize God has a purpose for everything!and maybe he knows we don't belong for each other.after several years i recover and finally i found the right guy for me and settle down he's much better than the other!i learned to forgive my old hubby when i meet my husband!i am in good hand's now!same what will happen to your friend!just keep on believing.God will take care of the rest!God Speed

I don't know wether the guy really realize his fault.I think if your friend really love him,she can give him one chance.If he cheat her again,never forgive him!

Hello soulstar24. I had the same situation with my first ex boyfriend. He cheated on me on the first time. It was so hard for me to trust again afraid that he might do it again,but since he promised that he wont do it again, I trusted him again. After a few months, I found out that he did it again with a different girl. He cheated on me again. We called it quits because I couldnt take it any longer. Your friend should be careful for her man might cheat on her again.

You can if you think theyve changed. once a cheater isnt always a cheater but if they keep doing it everytime you forgive them then forget it

My take on this I believe, is not if I can trust him again, because that is something that you'll earn with time's help. The wound created is something that you would have to mend by showing your partner that you deserve a second chance and you wouldn't repeat the same mistakes again. The main thing here, I believe is if you can still risk your heart being able to handle the same pain once this repeats. If you can sacrifice living through days remembering what he did without blaming him for something he did, and being able to love him as much as you loved him before the incident happened. It's hard but it'll also show how you can mature and accept things despite of what happened.

I believe it would take a decent amount of time being apart and getting to know themselves as individuals and figuring out what went wrong. I believe they would each need individual counseling and then couples counseling when they were ready. I also believe if they both want to heal that they have to view the problem a day at a time. Wake up everyday trying to be the best partner you can be is how I would always view things. As long as they view it as a work in progress and your friend knows there is still a CHANCE that her heart will be even more broken then I say with prayer it could work. However, if I was her I would make sure that he knew he would have to regain trust and nnot just pretend nothing happened.

Hello soulstar24. My ex boyfriend cheated on me and swore he wouldnt hurt me again. Little by little I started to trust him again. It was so hard. After one year, he cheated on me again. I was so hurt. I felt that no one will take me seriously. I am now with someone new. It took me forever to trust him. Tell your friend that if her boyfriend is sincere in what he says then I think she should give her a chance. As the saying goes everybody deserves a second chance but, if she has doubt about getting back with her ex then, she might as well look for a another guy.

If someone loves another person they wouldn't and/or couldn't do something that would hurt the person that much. Some say that forgiveness is hard but if you are in love you can find a way. Bull! Don't get me wrong I don't believe that "once a cheater always a cheater" stuff we always hear. But what I do believe is that if someone is willing and able to cheat on you then it wont be a one time thing. Maybe the next relationship they are in they wont cheat on the person. But... That's just it, they didn't care enough about you to put your feelings ahead of a simple attraction. True, honest, unchanging love wont allow either person in the relationship to cheat. If it does then it isn't true, honest and unchanging. Because true love doesn't hurt that bad. Honest loves doesn't involve that big of secrets to be kept from each other. And unchanging love doesn't just move one when some one cuter, better, or different comes along. *A real man doesn't have to romance a different woman every night, A real romances the same woman every night*

i would say if they really regrat for wat they have done for their loved ones... or if they feel for it then there is chances to trust them if not there is no point to take them back ...it's not safe to do tat ...

For me, I don't think so. I think that will definitely be the end of the relationship. Dating, engagement, marriage even. I think that's just totally out of line in which it's just conniving on why they would betray you that way.

I guess I could say its a choice between amnesty and pardon. In pardon the sin is forgiven and not forgotten but in amnesty its forgive and forget. It is really up to you which one you would like to follow. All I can say is even if you give amnesty there is still doubt because you will always look back on the past as your reference.

in order to gain our trust after cheated we must be work out for that trust. be honest and transparent to our partner. be patience if they get back to the issue.

It's to hard admit thats its difficult to put your trust again on any person who betrayed, deceived or even cheated on you. But if you really love him/her you must take chances and sacrifice for the one you love.

I would say he would have to build a lot of trust back with me. I mean he would need to do somethings to earn my trust back and it would all be determind by me. But because I am a chritian I have to forgive but you can forgive without trusting.

Hello friend, It is a very sensitive issue and a difficult situation for her. One cannot feel what she is going through unless one has experienced and it is very easy to give advice than to actually follow it. She is definitely not obliged to forgive him and that man does not deserve her trust. If she is a great person, she might consider forgiving him and giving him one last chance but I am not too sure about it.

That depends on different things and persons.If he cheated her for some kind reasons,I think she shoud forgive him.Every one of us may make mistakes for some certain reasons.But if he did that for selfish, she should consider the thing from beginning.I think.

Well, for me, I would choose never to trust him any more. Sometimes, swearing is not enough to make sure everything will never happen again. And I also believe we can find someone who do not cheat. So why not give us a chance to live a better life. Having trust on someone is really hard. We need much understanding on each other. So I would say sorry to your friend's sufferings.

Well, i don't know if i'm in a position to say anything sincee i have never been cheated on but i can imagine how that would make someone feel. Well i guess a relationship could still work out however, there will always be moments where yor friend would doubt him, i mean he cheated on her so i wouldn't blame your friend for not being able to really trust him eeven though they're still together. I guess it would take him quite sometime to ean back her trust. If he was really sincere about not doing it again, he'd od whatever it takes to earn her trust back. Tell your friend to be strong and since she had decided to stay in this relationship, tell her not to let her guard down because anything can happen, she should prepare herself just in case...=] Being hurt twice would just be a shame on her. =]

Yes, I have. My only boyfriend broke up with me for almost a year that I never thought he would walk back into my life again. In love, there's no less. We should just keep loving, giving it all. That's just how it is.

It sure is possible to trust again but this time around the trust won't come easy and neither will be unshakable like it initially was. Forgive and forget sounds real good but honestly even if we forgive, forget doesn't come easy. Am not saying that don't trust again. I am a firm believer in giving second chances. But this time around he will have to actually prove he is worth me trusting him to regain the trust i initially had in him. And this cannot be done at one go. This happens over time. One tip :- If you are getting back together again then don't keep mentioning that incident again and again in every fight etc. That way neither u will be able to forget it nor will u let the other person get over it and work towards improving. If you find it that impossible to get it out of your head it better if you call it quits. No use wasting time on something which deep in ur heart u know can't be mend.