I just said 'enough is enough' to my relationship!
By laydee
@laydee (12798)
Philippines
April 21, 2009 8:12am CST
We've been 'on the rocks' for almost a month now. He's been avoiding talking to me for several days, he'd always say 'he's busy', got a lot of complaints about me, and I'd been driving myself nuts on how to contact him.
I thought everything would be better since he talked to me (for a few minutes) yesterday, and everything wasn't really all roses and stuff, but at least we were talking.
Until tonight. He was at it again and finally my patience grew thin and just snapped! I told him enough was enough! I'm tired of his attitude and if he doesn't want to talk to me anymore, then fine! It's tiring to be the one who always begs to talk and it's tiring to wait for someone who can't even spare a few effort to talk to you.
Anyhow, that's it! I'm not saying I'm over the guy, but I just felt that these things aren't worth the effort anymore.
Have you ever experienced a situation where you just grew tired of everything and have just felt as if you've done everything you can and there's nothing else you can do so you just give up? How did it feel?
2 people like this
18 responses
@angel_rain (271)
• Philippines
22 Apr 09
CONGRATULATIONS!Well done,I have experienced this situation 2 years ago and I can say that i really made the right decision to just give up on him.It is very tiring to be the one who always understand and give and be the one to have a lot of patience.But human as we are we also have limits,men always think that they are God's gift to women that's why they look and think highly of themselves.I wish men would grow up (emotionally).
1 person likes this
@angel_rain (271)
• Philippines
22 Apr 09
I'm very happy that when you did that decision it's because you are thinking about yourself.You are on the right track,who else will love ourselves than us?!If we will not give respect and love to ourselves we will never be loved and respected by others.As they say, "Love thy self before others".It's not selfishness but it's how you value yourself.Hope some women will do what you did because I know some women are suffering because they don't love their self more.
@yuguoli (83)
• China
22 Apr 09
I guess I can feel you at some degrees and terribly sorry for that, pal. I think you did the right thing, or maybe you rushed a little bit. I don't know the exact situation but I think at least you tried.
And for your questions. I did experience such situation with desperation that I grew tired of everything after I tried my best to endure or stand. It's not like I GAVE IT UP but things cannot be controlled and because I'm just a person without any power. It just feels like the hell you know. It's really a tough time for me to go through and nobody cares for you. So ... But now I have learnt to rescue myself from the bottom while facing the stuff. And at last, pal, good luck to you and have a good mood with your efforts. lol
1 person likes this
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
23 Apr 09
Thanks for the kind words there, I absolutely feel that I've done my part and in any relationship, it always takes two to tango, I couldn't just blame him for everything but I shouldn't do all the fixing up alone either.
It's just sad because I really thought he could be the one for me.
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
22 Apr 09
This is the beginning of a rundown in a relationship. I think I am a thick face person who doesn't care if he put on a sulky face and refuses to talk to me. I find my own little things to do and create my own world. Silence is golden they say and that has a deep seated meaning in me. The more you show your concern about his silence the more he keeps his distance. If you portray a couldn't care less attitude, it will shock his system and will take every opportunity to attract your attention. Try that out.
@paulw33 (297)
• United States
22 Apr 09
wow yes u sound like my women lol not funny really im one of those pig headed guys and me and my women have been together for 6 years we met on the net but now we are getting ready to split because i was to stupid to listen i was the same way wouldnt listen and now im paying because she wants to go our seperate ways i woke up now but i think it is to late cause of me slacking and not talking and working things out she now tells me that she has started to have feelings for her ex husband so now im paying we are supose to go our seperate ways the first i have woke up and tryed to talk to her even cryed but i think it is to late if this guys really loves you he will wake up good luck
1 person likes this
@scarletwitch12 (562)
• Philippines
22 Apr 09
I had a boyfriend when I was seventeen and we went out for a little over two months and then suddenly we just stopped talking. There are a lot of things we never agreed about and probably because we weren't matured enough to power through our differences, we just fell apart.
The truth is that when these things happen, it hurts a lot. Because you have invested time and effort to the relationship and it is such a crappy reason to break up.
In your case, where your boyfriend just avoids talking to you, I think it is better off that you ended it. Whatever the problem is, it could have been settled if you only sat down and had a good talk. But if he just shuts you out of his life and talks to you just when he feels like it, it is just not worth the effort of fighting to save the relationship.
For your sake, I hope you find someone better that he ever was to you. There are many decentn guys out there who would love and respect you and who would give you the attention you deserve.
Good luck to you!
1 person likes this
@anniecheung216 (168)
• China
22 Apr 09
We argue a lot.Normally we talk to each other few minutes later.The longest is the day after we argued.
Generally ,when we argued,if is my fault,i will talk to him first.
@anniecheung216 (168)
• China
22 Apr 09
If is his problem,he will do it first.
We never make it last long.
For your case,i think the relationship between you and your partner is in trouble.
So your dicision is right.Better to break up early.
1 person likes this
@ladybug565 (2216)
• United States
22 Apr 09
Laydee, I'm sorry. I have been in that position a few times before. that is why I am so gaurded usually. it feels awefull.
1 person likes this
@sanuanu (11235)
• India
22 Apr 09
Is the laydee saying or her heart is saying?
This is very important. It is easier said than done and you knows it very well. I don't know what happened between you in only 12 hours that he started yelling at you once again.
did you get involved in physical relationship with him too?
1 person likes this
@JOIEMARVIC (2335)
• Philippines
22 Apr 09
Too bad to hear your story. If you really think that the realtionship is really not working and is not healthy for the two of you anymore, it is better to stop and end the realtionship. Continuing this realtionship will only hurt both of you even more. I also believe that if the guys is really INTO YOU, you would not have to end up feeling that way. Just think that your too good for him and go moving on with your life. Sour graping will do nothing good. Your too hot to do that.
1 person likes this
@neerajpandey_13 (1765)
• India
21 Apr 09
If you want to say like that then think more about this because once you broken off then you don't have second chance of involving in relationship.
1 person likes this
@KatherineP (8)
• Philippines
22 Apr 09
I also experience what you experience right now laydee..its hurt but you need to give up him..Or maybe you need to talk him already if your relationship still going strong or what... Girl move on..if he loves you he will never tell you he is busy or tired.. Its up to you to decide gurl..goodluck...email me gurl i wlll give you advice regarding your situation..Me? im happy now, I'm already move on the past..email me girl..pilarkatherine@yahoo.com
1 person likes this
@rakesh284 (1472)
• India
22 Apr 09
Well sometimes it happens that one person might misunderstand the other one.
He might be in some trouble or busy with some work.
Every coin has two faces if he was talking to you what was he doing whole day?
You should have asked him whether he is in any sort of problem or something else that he is not able to spend time and talk with you.
Your reaction might have hurt both of you.
If possible and if you both have real love then try to reset this?
You both will remain happy!
1 person likes this
@vivianchen (2646)
• China
22 Apr 09
Your story reminds me about my story. We have the same situation, but it's more like i am the one who don't want to talk, and my ex-bf tried to let me talk to him, i was just so pround of myself that i did not want to talk. Actually i don't remember why i was so pissed off on him at that time, but i still remember his saying, he said, you have the last chance to leave this house, if you even leave, don't come back!(Every time we have a fight, i want out of the house and stay in my friend's house, and he was angry about this). So that the last time we have a fight, i never go back.
1 person likes this
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
26 Apr 09
its good for you.. that you were able to say finally that you are over this relationship. i am happy for you that you are through. the first step is really for you to decide that you need to step out of it.. the next step is to continue and to stand up for your decision...
@iskayz (5420)
• Philippines
21 Apr 09
Hi there!
I did experienced it one time. Like you I was the one going crazy and trying hard to contact him. Embarrassing to admit but I was the one in pursuit of him. It was tiring to be always the one thinking of him so I asked advice from my guy friend on what to do. He said that I should stop pursuing him. Don't call him and stop looking for him. Let him feel that he's not wanted at all for him to realize that he still needs me. I did everything what my friend told me and it worked! He was the one who came up to me and patch things up.
You know I think in general when it comes to relationships guys don't like to be nagged. Pursuing is a form of nagging and if it's getting too irritating experiencing it everyday they tend not to response at all. Other times when a guy becomes cold in a relationship it is a sign that they want out.
I hope you'll get over the guy sooner. Cheer up!
Ciao!
I did experienced it one time. Like you I was the one going crazy and trying hard to contact him. Embarrassing to admit but I was the one in pursuit of him. It was tiring to be always the one thinking of him so I asked advice from my guy friend on what to do. He said that I should stop pursuing him. Don't call him and stop looking for him. Let him feel that he's not wanted at all for him to realize that he still needs me. I did everything what my friend told me and it worked! He was the one who came up to me and patch things up.
You know I think in general when it comes to relationships guys don't like to be nagged. Pursuing is a form of nagging and if it's getting too irritating experiencing it everyday they tend not to response at all. Other times when a guy becomes cold in a relationship it is a sign that they want out.
I hope you'll get over the guy sooner. Cheer up!
Ciao!1 person likes this
@brady2moss (700)
• Singapore
21 Apr 09
Bravo laydee! Stick it right to him, if he can ignore you like that then by all means you can definitely do the same. That jerk doesn't deserve your time and attention, so move on with your life, go out and meet people, then maybe just maybe you'll find a better man, goodluck on that! Oh and yes I have experienced that before, and to be honest it was such a relief. I wish I did it sooner rather than later.
1 person likes this
@foisgras (205)
• Sweden
21 Apr 09
You see you are not alone having the same problems, that's for sure.
Rush decisions are always easy to make specially in anger.
You might want to make considerations to other things rather than giving up easily because your relationship has been "on the rocks! for a month.
When you are in the state of harmony sit down and write 10 statements why you should stay in the relationship and another set of 10 why you want to end the relationship.
Then decide and do not regret. Move forward and explore the radiance of happiness.
Good-luck!
1 person likes this
