arguments

I have heard so many times that argumesnts are good for a relationship... But why?? That is what I would like to know. I hate them...ugh they drain me mentally. I would rather just talk like adults about things and call that healthy.. Lol I guess there is some good reason behind arguments being healthy, I just don't know what that reason is. My hubbs and I have our moments. We can go weeks and weeks without a fight, but once a fight comes along, we will usually fight a few more times before we go back on our no fighting streak again. Lol

I agree. I think that any dialogue that is respectful of both parties is healthy and moves things along. You learn alot about a person in a argument. I don't argue very much, I am a compromiser. I hate raised or/and loud voices. Unless it is something very important I just don't go there. As far as arguments with children I did that and it doesn't help. You need to come from a whole different direction with kids and so I use the love and logic techniques I have learned.

Well, indulging into arguments, if done positively and constructively, at times may result into strengthening the relationship. But the motive of the arguments should be to improve the relationship (among for example your spouse) and not otherwise. It should be constructive from either side. The arguments at times tend to be misconstrued and may lead to creating a dent in the relationship. Another important aspect in the arguments is that you should also be reciprocal and you should also try to hear the arguments against you more positively. More importantly, if a little-bit of calmness/coldness develops as a result of the arguments, the partner who tries to restore the relationshipments earlier is nicer than the other. So try to take a lead to restore the relationships immediately. It is also important to understand that you should avoid argumentation in front of your elders or for that matter even before your children for there are chances of those being escalated and lasting longer.

i think that it would add up some spice to your relationship. i had a boyfriend before that would make me feel that i am like a princess. he would never start a fight, never ask me questions that would hurt my feelings, follow almost all my ideas, attain to whatever i want, things like that. and it just so happen that i am looking for someone that would challenge me because i am very independent person or very private about my feelings and i want someone to dig into that to make life or our relationship interesting.. you know what i mean..

I think arguments are inevitable in a relationship - now if they're healthy or not is a different issue. And it mostly depends on individuals. Why are arguments inevitable? Two different human beings - two different opinions, none of which will always agree. The human mind is simply amazing that two people can look at one thing and see something totally different. That's just how it is. Are they healthy? They can be! Arguments bring out something in you that your partner has not seen - whether that be an opinion or a characteristic. I think the execution of an argument is what makes it healthy or not. Like you said, they can get out of control - next thing you know, it's over.

i salute on that way that it is a healthy way to check it over. i also experienced that in my family that we argue with some matters coz we tend to be our ideas be heard by our peers and group. its only the expression of our opinions to be given a chance to be followed. in the relationship its the test between you and ur partner. whether he is fair, listen and not one sided. it must be sharing of thoughts in the family. i just experienced it sometimes when my mind is hot.

Absolutely 100% correct. I think that it is the saving grace for a couple to have the skill of constructive arguing. I mean to say, to be able to agree to disagree. With this "agreement" at the start, arguments that get blow way out to left field can always be avoided. This is healthy for two mature people to grasp so to overcome any hurdles that will arise in a relationship when it comes to personal beliefs and preferences. The magic word is "compromise". To argue to the point of yelling, becoming loud and maybe even violent is irresponsible, disrespectful and somewhat immature. It is healthy to argue, constructively. We must feel comfortable to voice our opinion and confident enough to have and hold onto our own. This is what makes us who we are. We can not change another, nor should we allow another to try to change who we are by means of power tripping, yelling and getting violent because they don't like our individual thoughts, opinions and feelings. I love a good debate. I dislike having to get into one with someone who is stubborn. My love interest is somewhat still a bit immature in some areas. He rather yell at me and then blow me off for awhile. I can't change him. Only he can change himself. Within my immediate family, we do not argue. We tell it like it is, we call it as we see it and we agree to disagree. We are all entitled to our opinion, doesn't mean that the other has to like it.

Hi friend . i agree with you a healthy argument in peaceful atmosphere is absolutely fine in relationship. this not only give you idea of your partners view but also helps you to understand how much your partner is serious careful in relationship. Only care to be taken is that Such arguements should be in peaceful atmosphere and should not hurt partners feeling than life would be definately better ful of hapiness.

I definitely think that arguments are good. They can be hurtful sometimes, but I think that arguments happen for a reason and that is because one or both people in a relationship are frustrated and need to let their partner know that things are not going well for them, and I think a lot can be resolved in an argument, as long as both partners seek to discuss the problems and work things out together. Sometimes it can be the best thing for a couple. I think couples who do not argue are the one's who are in trouble because they are obviously holding things in, and letting them fester.

Well, to tell you the truth, I'm a little partial on the subject. Arguments CAN be healthy depending on how they are resolved! If you're going to get into it with your loved one about little things...then it's not healthy. An argument should only occur when all other options have been exhausted and no medium can be reached, now their is only one thing left to do...ARGUE! Now, personally, I believe that between two people who are good for each other, arguments aren't going to occur very often, if not ever! The amount of arguments you have with your loved one depends on how compatible you are, and the sooner you realize this, the sooner you can better yourself and your relationship. The reason most arguments occur is because there is a difference in opinion, caused by two people just being different in general! Most of the time, one of them (if not both) is going to try and convince the other person that their belief or opinion is wrong, and that they themselves are right, when really, it's just what it is...a matter of opinion!!! One more thing, and not to pick on you...a relationship is about two people acting as one. There is only one way to achieve this, and that is to put your partner before yourself! Perfect example...look at your posting...you say, and I quote 'ME and my partner...' when it's really supposed to say 'MY PARTNER and I...' Trust me my friend, it's the little things that are going to make a difference. Start by seeing what you can do for your partner, and if reciprocated, then you guys can be successful!