How do you know when enough is really enough?

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My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years. We have one son who is 3 and another on the way. He never does what he says he is going to do. It doesn't seem like we have the same life goals at all. We fight all the time. He brings over a lot of girlfriends and guy friends from work (I'm not worried about the guys) I work 45-60 hours a week, he stays home with our son and works about 15 hours a week. He spends more than he makes, doesn't clean the house unless one of those girlfriends are coming over, and never makes dinner. We only have one vehicle, so if he is gone I am stuck and vice versa. For the past couple of weeks he would call me and tell me he misses me and wants me to come home early. I usually oblige and then when I get home he leaves and is gone until I go to bed, then gets mad when he gets home and I am in bed. When we get into arguments he references that I work all the time to be away from our son, and that I don't care about him as much because I work all the time. I try and explain to him that if we would work a second job, or more hours or spend less, anything then I can work less. He doesn't get it, it really upsets me everytime. He doesn't care. I just don't know what to do anymore. I definetly can't do it by myself, although it feels like I am for the most part. I love him, but I know I need more from him than he is willing to give. He makes refrences to me cheating becasue I am working all the time, yet we never have any money. Surprise it goes to bills, but again another things he doesn't get. I just wish he would get a wake up call or something and turn into the man I and our children need him to be. But I think its a lost cause what do you think?