Should child services give the parents the benefit of the doubt

One of my friends is a foster carer and she finds it an incredibly rewarding job. She is currently caring for two sisters called Marie Anne and Anne Marie. They are aged three years and one year. She is also caring for a three month old baby girl called Sky. The sisters came from parents that neglected them. They will soon be adopted to a loving couple that will make excellent parents. The baby girl came from a teenage mum that couldn't cope. The social services can fail some children in its system. Social workers do their best but there have been a few horrible cases of severe neglect. I am a primary school teacher and if I am worried about a child in my class I speak to the child protection officer. Once I had to write weekly reports on a child that was being monitored. His older brother was more affected by the awful home life they came from. In the end the two boys went to live with their caring grandparents. Another boy was taken into care. His dad had killed himself and his mum was very depressed. She said the most shocking things. I hope that all children in need get the help they need to be safe. Good luck with your foster parent training.

No I don't think that they should give the parents the benefit of the doubt because then where does the line of "ok we will believe you this time, parents of these children" no matter how horrible they are treating or neglecting the children is? And there are a lot of parents out there who seriously dont realize they are doing anything wrong, i used to work with a woman who left her children in a car in a casino parking lot, she said "it was only 1 hour and it wasn't even hot outside"....this woman seriously was so dumb that she had no clue the danger she put her children in....so because she is just dumb should she have not had the kids taken away? My answer is no because no matter what, she did something wrong and negelectful and so although of course I wish kids could live happily and healthy with their parents, we live in a messed up world where thats not always possible......big kudos and praise to you for becoming a foster parent, you are a wonderful person for that

As a parent who had CPS called on me, I am a bit sensitive to this issue. In our case, we were accused of neglect because our 6 and 7 year old were allowed to play outside, unsupervised. Nevermind the fact that I was in the house on bedrest with a high risk pregnancy and a toddler, and the fact that we lived way out in the county and our yard was fenced, away from all traffic, and I could see, and hear, them at all times due to huge picture windows. The kids had not been injured and they were not causing trouble. Someone simply felt they knew what was better for my kids and chose to report this as neglect. Now if CPS had come and automatically taken my children, there would have been an uproar in the community and rightfully so. Instead, they investigated the case, which took several weeks, and it all came back as unfounded. The case worker still had to do her job even though she felt that the reason behind the neglect accusation was ridiculous. It is not unheard of for schoolage children to play outside with direct adult supervision. Now having stated my case, I do feel that when there is clear evidence of gross abuse and/or neglect, the kids need to be removed immediately, and it is unfortunate that there are cases where it does not happen soon enough. My mom is a school nurse and reported a case of gross abuse of two brothers. The boys begged not to be sent home, but they were. It took a year to resolve the case, but the boys were pulled from their home and are now together in a foster home. My mom ran into them a few weeks ago and they are doing very well and are very happy. They were fortunate. The other thing to be aware of though is not all foster parents are as kind hearted as you. It is not uncommon to find foster parents that simply take the kids in for the small amount of money they receive. They don't spend the money on the kid, they keep it for themself. There have also been reports of deaths in foster care due to starvation, abuse, and stupidity. It is unfortunate that there are not more great foster parents and more caring case workers to ensure the children's safety, both at home and in the foster homes.

I had a friend who had her son taken away for a time. The kid had a habit of lying. Let me say that first off. One evening he came running into the kitchen and hit the corner of the counter, near his eye on the right side. She doctored him up, decided he was okay and sent him to school the next day. They saw the eye and asked him what happened. "My mom hit me." Child services was called and that started it all. He was given to the grandparents at his mother's request and she had supervised visitations with him. His story changed when the police asked him questions and changed again when they asked again. His final version was that he was sitting watching tv and his mom threw a baseball at him from the kitchen. The problem with the story was it was his right eye and the kitchen is to the left. I told my friend if her throwing is that good she needs to be recruited by a baseball team. Because I was also his day care provider I had to answer questions. I also told them of the time I watched his smack himself in the face with one of those flags they put into the ground to indicate where gas lines are. They lived across the street. I watched him do it, walk home (working up tears on the way) and then my phone rings. "Michael says Kristoffer hit him." My son was in the house the entire time. Even when it appears to be proven each case must be considered carefully as this example shows. My friend has her son back and its been several years since the incident. He's been diagnosed with Aspergers in the last year. Sadly, a late diagnosis as he's already in junior high but it explains a lot of his actions.

Hi Meandmy3, I am a mother of three children as you know and just after my second child was born my eldest daughter who was about 5 at the time was complaining that her leg hurt, she was a whinger and was always complaining of something so I didn't immediately take notice, then when after about half an hour and she was still sat on the sofa I took a look at her leg, it was horrific, bruises all over and asked how she had done it and she said mummy I have just been sitting here, I immediately rushed her to hospital and when I didn't have an explanation social services were called whilst she was waiting to go into xray as her leg now looked broken too, well before their own eyes her other leg started bruising and a specialist was called, it turned out that she had HSP and was the first case in over 10 years but I admire them for being on the ball as I could have been beating her for all they knew as we couldn't explain her injuries. There are so many faults in the system but on this occasion although innocent they were there to oversee the childs welfare. We hear such horrific things like Baby Peter though I sometimes wonder if the system I witnessed is a different one in certain areas and perhaps it all comes down to funding as to whether a child is recognised at risk bless. Pleased to hear that you are going to foster, not for me as I tried it once but it was a much older child and helping her with the transistion from care to community really. Huggles. Ellie :D

where i am at they dont take it lightley at all last year my son had a little scratch on his face from falling and the school called social services on me i thought that was a little crazy kids are going to get little scratches they are kids but anyways the lady came the same day with in 1 min after my son got home from school she took a pic of his face after it took her 5 min to even find it because it was so small, what makes me mad about social services is the people that do everything in there power to keep there kids safe and don't do anything to them the parents get a lot of trouble from them but the parents that are hurting there children nothing is being done to them i think that is back wards the case they had on me got closed of corse but it was just crazy that the school even called.

I don't have a problem with careful investigation of situations that look troublesome, but I have seen the system remove children too quickly. While I would like to advocate for a cautious preeptive approach, sometimes public damage is done that cannot be undone. I don't know where to draw the line, but I suspect that line may be different in every situation and that thought probably troubles some people. Spending taxpayer money to police how others raise their kids would not be my first choice but society does have a vested interested in protecting children. Congratulations on your recent approval for foster status: the job you'll be doing is the most important part of the protective process!

Bless you for becoming a foster parent! We need so many of them, so badly. Good ones, not the ones in it for the money (which I've heard isn't so great anyway!). I think if a child is not in good health, is obviously physically or psychologically abused, the parents should lose custody until it is straightened out. What ever became of orphanages? I know many of them were a mess, but there were many that were also homes of encouragement and love and friendship while a child grew up. There were many caretakers so it wasn't easy to be abusive, from what I hear. For some reason, the courts place family stability above all other needs and so many of those parents need their rights rescinded and mandatory sterilization. Yep, I'm extreme! Some people shouldn't have children and don't care enough to prevent it.

Where i live they do take it serious when someone has called DSS when it is toward a Child(ren). And During the investigation They will come to the home and remove the child(ren) from the home until everything is clear. So its not all states just some. But i would still say they could do more than they do though.

Overall I think if you have to err it should be in the interest of the child. Too many parents have been given the benefit of the doubt at the expense of their children. I also know the flip side of this where good parents are constantly harrassed by child services butif a child's life can be saved or made better this may be a small prcie to pay. I think social workers need to have more training to pick up on things that are not right regardless of what family and friends say, because they sometimes will lie to protect the parents.

I think it depends on the case. If the conditions can be fixed like a dirty house or low food and the parents can fix it the social services will get involved and make unannounced visits to check on the children that would be great. But if it is an abuse case then I think not they should never get away with abusing their children and never get them back. I commend you for offering a caring nurturing home for these children, even some foster homes are not safe for children sometimes. Blessings to you and your family for what you are doing! Good luck!

I think that childrens services could do more although its not always easy, they need to have substansial evidence otherwise they end asup getting sued if they wrongly aqccuse and take a child form the parents.. This is why they take so long to draw conclusions, i personally think its worng that they put money before childrens safety but thats the way the workd is these days isnt it... =(

there is friend of mine who has a little boy that she just dumps him to whomever she sees standing in the street. they took him to the hospital one night and he has worms now and the hospital called dcs. they called for an order of protection but then tristan was back with his momma the next day. i think they need to look out for the baby rather than the fact if he is with the momma. she doesn't want the kid and she's tried to do everything to put him off on someone else. i think it's time the state done something instead of just investigating it.

well as someone who use to think cps was a good thing. we just got out of a case with my step daughter, and her mom with all 3 of her kids, was proven neglect pictures that would make u sick of diaper rashes. but we were told nothing could be done. you dont have to have runing water, gas or electricity as long as you can feed your kids, take them somewhere or a neighbor. even tho doctors had concerns, and it said it was proven neglect. our hands are tied. so it will just be one of them gets seriously hurt and then maybe someone will believe us that they need out

Hi Friends, You know I am so sick of the CPS tying people's hands when it comes to our children. I have said here many times before, there is a difference between beating and disciplining your children. I was raised in a time when if I did something wrong I got a smack on the butt for sure. I certainly had more respect for my parents then most kids have today, simply because our hands are tied and the children know it. However, that has never stopped me from disciplining my kids (now 23, 19 and 15). My kids are so respectful and have very good manners. They always knew that if they got out of line, there would be consequences. And believe it or not, they really respect us for it. So I think CPS should be more worried about these idiots that are beating and sexually abusing their children and stay out of the lives of people just trying to do their best to be good parents. Cheers, Cheryl