too good to be true...is he for real?

Redflag: HE LIVES IN THE U.S. Sorry didn't mean to be loud but from my past experience of being on my own after 18, there are a lot of men with obligations in other countries ready to jump in the sack with another they cannot keep promises to. Another thing you HAVE to check out is if this guy is committing some kind of fraud and are you in danger of falling into it without even knowing, this happens city. The fact that he came just for vacation and decided to stay is real suspicious to me and 'it was all because of me', hogwash, where is his obligations, grown men do not just drop what their doing for no reason. Is he on the run?? WHY did he choose Singapore to vacation in? Theres no reason he shouldn't have an ID and ESPECIALLY in another country, being overseas IS the reason he should have his ID on him at all times. Have you visited him at his office? Love is about trust and if you cannot confide in him and him you then this relationship does not sound safe. Hey, love is not a once in a lifetime time as much as society likes to preach it to us. Love comes in so many forms its not worth risking your future happiness when you own intuition is guiding you and you should take this as a lesson because the unsuspecting do fall prey quite often. Heres what you do: You tell him that you want to call the relationship off, you have other obligations like your taking a class, or taking care of parents, etc and see what his reaction is, be strong. If he shows any sign of aggression when you resist (and do this for at least 3 days) you have to immediately be done, that means no calls, nothing. If he just disappears then better for you--all gut instinct has been confirmed, it wasn't the real deal. It could be that simply he has a wife at home and its not working and work is an excuse to get away. keep us updated.

oooohh.. another classic story of jumping the love wagon! Sounds like his a married man as married men who have affairs are never around during weekends... or maybe he's a fugitive or a convicted felon, who knows.. Don't jump on the "I'm so in love with him wagon" before you get all the facts right.. Get to know him fully before you commit to him. Do not allow yourself to be taken for a free ride because he has the abilty to sweet talk to you.. investigate his life more and ask him questions that you wont answers to.. if he's genuine he will be honest and tell you the truth.. if not he will give you every excuse in the book for you not to know... give him an ultimatim.. either the truth or its over.. at least that's what I would do...

i think you should be suspicious city. first he came from the US, all of a sudden he went to SG for vacation. and the fact that anybody that is not a resident or citizen of one particular country, bringing an ID is a must especially for aliens like him. he should have at least his passport to show to you, right? of course a man who has something in mind would always show his loved when the two of you are together, but once you or he is not around it seems like its a different story. caution city, you don't want to put yourself in a great state of trouble. but in the end, it would still be your choice and path to take. wishing you good luck!

hello, i think three months isn't just enough to know each other that well, especially that most of the time you are far away from each other. have some time knowing him first to avoid complications someday.i'm just wondering why he had no ID, one cannot enter the airport without an identification card, especially if you are travelling out of the country.

It sounds like you already don't trust him. It also sounds like he has given you many reasons to mistrust him. doesn't sound like he's "for real"... sounds more like he's looking for the "free ride" you are giving him by letting him stay there.

Well there is definitely something fishy about the situation, even if he go to his parents on weekends, one can understand that he is busy with family but somehow you manage to find sometime for the one you love, he can give you a 5 mins call before going to bed. On the other side, while in the OFFICE when he usually should be busy with work, he calls you and talks to you. This all don't sound very good to me. You have to find out what the truth is, and don't bug or ask him because by doing that you'll lose him either way even if he is not hiding or lying about anything, he won't like it that you don't trust him and that might break your relationship. So find some other way. Why don't ask him about his office and get some information from there. Try to do whatever you can girl. Wish you best of Luck.

he's too good to be true...your so lucky to find someone like him...but beware...since you've only known each other for quite sometimes...its not good to give your full trust to him...i understand where your coming from...it feels so good to have like him...but not all people are worth the trust that we give them..give time to get to know him better...best wishes

Your instincts are trying to tell you that something isn't right. How can he come to Singapore without adequate ID? There is the fact that he is nowhere to be found on weekends; could he have a family in the US? I would suggest asking him to put all his card on the table and be truthful but to be honest with you I don't think he is all that he says he is. You have to ask yourself whether you deserve to be feeling like this or to be with someone you can trust one hundred percent and who will not make you feel anxious or insecure. I think you may know the answer to that already. Good luck, keep us posted!

I have been in this situation before....except I was the man's wife. He acted the same way when he was cheating on me. He just acted that way towards his girlfriends during the week.

I know what it is like to be so in love. I fell in love with a man and all was not as it seemed. I didn't realize then until I had 2 children by him. Anyhow, there is so much out there you must think about. He could be married and have his family living with him and he stays with them on the weekends. There are men who do unspeakable things to young girls out there. I'm not saying he is one of those, but these are things you must think of. Just be careful.

Hi City_addict, First of all, you have to make sure where is he really come from? Is he really from U.S? I think if he is hinding his ID and all his personal information, he has an issue. Secondly, there is no doubt about that you love him and he love you too, but, there is difference between women's life and Men's love. If he be you because you are new to him, then later you will be hurt badly. Finally, all i have to say is stop loving him for a while. I am not saying to leave him. If he did cares about you, if he truely love you, he should show you the real him. Or, he is a fake one. Protect yourself is also a important thing. Good luck! I hope he is the real one and you guys can be together forever then!

i think you should not trust him totally. you're pretty. it is normal for the guy to like you the instant he met you but don't forget that men will always be men. they will take advantage as long as there is opportunity to do so.

Indeed he's hiding something from and you and that's what you're suppose to know. You can catch the fish through its mouth as the saying goes so you should sywar him to make him admit the truth behind those unanswerable questions that bothers you now. And maybe this could help you decide wether or not believe his sweet tongue.

it's like a romantic film,i believe it could be happen,but seldom. i sincerely hope you find a good lover.to be honesty,it could not happen on myself.itis just like story

They say too many excuses given in a relationship spells trouble. I think he might be hiding some facts from you, if not all. This is just hypothetically; he might be working here because he has a family that he brings from US? Supposedly he's married and he's come here to work and he sees dating you as another golden opportunity. Like hitting 2 birds with 1 stone. I'm sorry if this is a bit blunt, but I'm just pointing out what could be the possible reasons. Otherwise, he might love you totally and I don't doubt that he loves you. But if he's rather sneaky about his IDs and goes missing on the days you've mentioned, then something is cooking. Why not you suggest one of these days to check out his place just for the fun of it. Or start asking commitment questions, and you'll see whether he runs, hides or comes clean with whatever facts he's not telling. To love is one thing, but you need to know who you love too. I hope you have some ideas about how to go about handling this matter. It's entirely up to you. Glad to be of some help, if not all.

Hi, you was 3 months, i was 3 years...so..if i don t find the answer i have dubts that you can find the answer, if he will hide. Are man who just play with woman minds, want to see if they can play with a woman...nothing more, belive me. ok...i don t want to discuraging you...maybe there is other situation..but i lose all my trust in man, after a man say to me same words.....and after i saw him how try to make this with other woman...so, be careful, you will suffer a lot

For him to come to Singapore is a big step, but it becomes an entirely different story when he's there. It is so easy to say things and for me, if one minute you start to feel that something is not right, I think you should bring this up with him. You two should talk about this matter. It wouldn't be healthy for the relationship if you're together, but at the back of your head, you have stuff that's bothering you. He has to know that what you're feeling and I'd pray that he be truthful.

listen dear if your lover is loyal to you and you are just doubting him for not talking to you on weekends or don't have id etc..might be he is on a secret mission of some organization..try to think positive..what you can only do is being more concern about his work..ask him what work you do..it may be correct that guy is not a valid person but truly loves you by heart.. so be patient..and just think as being a cool minded person...

This is a really trickey situation. As you are in love with him, may be your judgement will be biased.You may have these suspicions but will still try to find some way of finding an explanation,as you want this relation to work.I have been in a similar situation.Love can really blind you to all logic. I suggest act wisely.He seems to be hiding something.Try confronting him and explain to him what sort of fears you have been having.If he helps calm you down and gives you explanations,think over it.On the other hand,if he just says trust me and everything is ok, I think there is something creepy. May be another woman in the picture or may be he is hiding his real identity from you. Just be careful.God bless you.

oh,Friend,may be he is a family man.