If your husband/wife thinks you're too fat, should you leave them?

I think that if a person says another's fat they need to look at the way it was said. Not all people are going to say it to be mean, and I would hope that a husband or wife would definitely not say it to be mean. My fiance and I are a bit overweight and we're both on a diet. When he had to eat certain foods, I ate them right along with him. We're just like that. I don't think anyone should leave another just because of their weight, and I also think that if a husband or wife says anything about the others weight it's more to make sure that the husband or wife is healthy! or atleast it should be!

Most women are very sensitive about the issue of weight or food intake especially if it is from husband's comment. Sometimes my husband will bring to my attention everytime he thinks I am eating something i should not and it drives me crazy and always ends up with an argument. I have been always obsessed with food and think about it a lot. I never had an eating disorder.My husband is very fitness minded and he watches what he eats very carefully.At first, i really dont like someone else to talk about my eating habits and it's really fraustrating, considering that I am not fat.Eventually, i get used to it but i already talked to him that he should not throw his comment about food, eating and being fat in public place or infront of other people and he also explained it to me that he just concerned with my health.

I would not allow my spouse to become fat, not because how she will look, but fatness causes a lot of sickness in the future. So taking care of ones' health at an early stage is very important. And if you take care of your health regularly, it helps you to look younger as well, thats what I had read in some books sometime back. And I'm sure everyone wants to be healthy and fit. So take charge now or regret later.

listen gaining wait is not in your hand and if your husban/wife want to leave you is his/her choice but you can find someone who love you truly not your body figure if you have big problem meet me on yahoo parimal_ajudiya

Well if your husband/wife thinks your too fat, is it for health reasons, or just the fact that you dont have that body that you use to have years ago before you got married... Well if you are a little over weight, and you want to get in shape do it, but if you are confortable with they way you look, then your other half either has to deal with the new you... or leave... I would say the only time that it really is time to leave the person for saying something for adding a couple pounds of the years, is when they are constantly calling you fat, and making you feel horrible... Thats abuse and it doesnt matter if you are a man or a woman or a children... No one deserves it, and its not in the "norm"... get away from the relationship and start living for you, and your children..

If your husband or wife love you, should never mind how fat you are, love needs tolerance,right? or can you accept your husband or wife doesn't love, if the answer is yes, should leave then. but some girls can bear themselves too fat, they will keep fit with self-concious.Each girl is like beauty things.

Hello, good morning, let me joint your topic. Of corse not and fortunately my wife didnt degrades my body images although now at my 56 years age I am really fat compared to my young age. When we get married I was only 62 kg but now I am already 75 kg with big stomach as if 6months prgnant woman hahahaha, and fortunately my wife able maintain her weight that she didnt become too fat, even she looks like stable. even if she became 100kg now I dont think that I will leave her just because her body become fat. Sexually fat woman or the slim one has not much diference even in bed sometime the fat will be better sparing partner... hehehehe...my old teache told that fat people usually is a good people and it is true I have much prove and eveidence that fat peopled usually good peoples, just like me ! I a fat man see... hehehe... above all thank you for your interesting topic so that I can send my new post and add my earning. see you.

Hi drsenergy and welcome to mylot. Hope you will enjoy this site. No, I think it is better if the two try to help one another instead of leaving someone in hard times. Being fat is not easy, and this person do have some issues with it. I rather should see they are working on it together and in this way come closer one another. that is what love is all about.

If I'm being honest, if I really loved them, I would probably try to change for them. My self esteem is really low, and if they said our relationship was failing because of the way I looked, I would be very likely to believe that. I know, by principle, you should never change the way you are for someone else- if they can't appreciate the person you are, then why should you be with them? But, if I loved someone a lot, I probably wouldn't be able to help myself.

i dont think i will.but if he cares my fat very much..angry at me..dont like me bcz of my being fat.. i think i will leave him.. or wt he said is right.maybe he is just kidding

I think that this really depends on a few things. If the spouse is being abusive with comments about weight, then that would certainly be grounds for leaving. But I don't think that concerns about weight should immediately be taken on the offense. Sometimes, after all, it is all too easy to let yourself go in a marriage. Bringing something up about weight could immediately be taken to heart and it shouldn't always be seen that way. After all, you have to look at each other every day. You should want to look your best for each other.

Yes, health is important. But it is much more important that love be based on more than physical appearances. My hubby has a weight problem, but I would never leave him because of it. I worry about his health but I want him to fell strongly enough about himself to want to make a change, not because I demand it. Worrying about how people look is superficial - it is who we are inside that matters. My husband is still and will remain the wonderful guy I married!

you shoud say and if she/he really loves you she will execpt it

I am lucky. When I first met my husband, I had recently lost 40 pounds (from a high of 170 in college). However, after we moved in together I gained all that weight back and more. I was worried that he would not be as attracted to me, but it turned out that he was more attracted to me with the added weight. He told me it didn't matter how much I gained. After having struggled and dieted since I was 15 to keep my weight down, this was completely liberating. I started eating what I wanted. After a couple of years together, we got married. We're very happy together and he loves me as much today even though I'm now 280 pounds. i know that's a lot of weight for my size (5' 3") but I feel that the phychological relief of not battling my weight more than makes up for it.

Hi, I dont think just cuz of over weight and you get yourself divorce!!! please think about it and it is not just cuz of that... sometimes he just want to let you know that you are a little over weight now and need to take care of yourself. I always ask my husband about my weight and how I look too, if he say Im too fat then I just watch what I eat. However, he said He doesn't care whether I am fat or not, as long I still love him and he still love me then that's enough already.

It depends on how they interpret it. If they're really aware of my body just because of health issues, I'll tolerate that one. But if they tell me about my body image in a way of insult, I'd really get upset and tell him but won't leave him.

If he thinks your too fat. Hello my friend, if he thinks that you're too fat tell him to go and look in the mirror. He might then see that he has gained a few extra pounds too. I don't think that you should leave a spouse if he happen to tell you that you are too fat. Just go on and try to loose a few pounds and if after loosing weight and getting healthy again that he still complain about you then maybe you should think about loosing him. I do think that Love should be based upon more than just looks but then again some people just let their selves go and that's not good for their health either.

Hi, I agree with you. In this place we should ditinguish two cases. If he ask you to loose weight because you want to see a nice wife, he is selfish. I think if someone love you,he will buy you what you want to eat and do his best to make you happy. Image is one factor to attract spouse but not the most important factor.If someone love you, it is not just because of your image. I hate someone ask his girlfriends or her boyfriends to loose weight just because he or she think it is ugly. If he ask you to loose weight because of the health problems, he is right. You know,fattness will cause a lot of diseases.If he is worrying about your health, he really love you. All in all ,if you are healthy and he thinks you are too fat,he is selfish and superficial. You should talk to him and speak out your thoughts. If he is not aware of his wrong thoughts, maybe you should consider leave him.

I think that the person you are with should love you for what you are and people change and you know what I have had three kids and my body has change but my fiance has never asked me to lose weight or told me that I was fat he always tells me your not fat your just right even though I know that I am twenty pounds over weigth I dont think that the person you are with should tell you things like that I think that they should love you uncontionally and if they feel like you are not just right for them then yeah leave them because you are not what they want they should love you for what you are and not try to change you never change for nobody and if you want to change your body do it because you want to not because you want to change for someone

if he/she really loves u..fat is not the matter..=)