Is Self harm really a normal way of coping with stress?
By tjades
@tjades (3591)
Jamaica
May 29, 2009 9:12pm CST
A good friend and I had a really good discussion earlier today where we discussed issues such as self harm, suicide, stress and coping abilities. We were discussing life in general and the pressures some people have to endure.
It was here that I was informed that counselors consider self harm as a "normal" way of dealing with stress. She related to me that persons who feel as if they are losing control of their lives tend to focus on something they can have some level of control over. I guess self harm helps them to control the pain and distress they are going through.
I shiver to think of people who actually cut themselves and stuff like that. For some reason it gets to me more than the talk of suicide does. I see suicide as a weak way of copping out of life so that may be the reason I am not so phased by it. But to think that someone would repeatedly slash or hurt themselves some other way....
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Could self harm be a pre runner to suicide?
Are they really separate issues or would a counselor use the signs of one to look for the other?
...
Could self harm be a pre runner to suicide?
Are they really separate issues or would a counselor use the signs of one to look for the other?4 people like this
4 responses
@russso (1693)
• Philippines
30 May 09
For me, harming oneself is not a normal way to cope with stress. I think that it manifests low EQ. Perhaps has serious issues that should be dealt with because if this is not looked into, it can be really destructive in the future, especially when one already has a family of his own.
1 person likes this
@tjades (3591)
• Jamaica
30 May 09
Id really hate or should I say scared to have to deal with someone who resorted to harming themselves. I stayed away from nursing because having to deal with people hurting in a certain way was just not my best talent. I love counseling but theres a point when it gets too much.
Id maybe end up causing them more distress from my breaking down or having to leave the room. Its just scary and makes me shiver.
The issues don't go away do they. They still have to face reality after a session of self harm.
@russso (1693)
• Philippines
31 May 09
It's a sad reality that there are people who aren't used to having problems and difficulties in life. There really are people who are afraid of problems and when they experience such things in life, instead of making something good out of the problem, they take it upon themselves.
1 person likes this
@rsa101 (38166)
• Philippines
30 May 09
I would not consider that normal since there are many other means to cope with stress. I have the impression that you one person who would self harm may at one point in time if he is allowed to do this repeatedly would really harm himself that could cost him his life.
1 person likes this
@Ithink (9980)
• United States
31 May 09
I wouldnt say it is normal, if it was wouldnt we all be cutters? My daughter started this and her therapist says it is for attention. She is now 18 and has done alot of things that makes it impossible for us to have her in our home. It is made harder by the fact that we have our 2 year old granddaughter, her daughter. We have total guardianship because of the things she has done.
We once again got her help or at least contacted some places that are hoping that they can help her.
Anyways, no I dont think it is normal and in her case the cuts are basically superficial and I have done lots of reading and the ones that show it off are basically attention seekers.
1 person likes this
@dianamunoz1 (125)
• United States
30 May 09
I dont think that its a normal way i think some people really just have problems that they need to seek medical help for I have a sister in law that cuts her rist but does it to make sure that she doesnt cut anything vital and then takes pictures and sends them to the whole family and calls us to tell us and i think that thereason that she does it to get what she wants she is twenty nine and I know she just does it to get what she wants because as soon as the pictures come in my fiance her brother runs over to give her whatever it is that she wants most of the time that is money
1 person likes this
@tjades (3591)
• Jamaica
30 May 09
Hi Diana 
.
That cant be good. She is 29 yrs old...Not a teenager. Poster number three gave what I consider a good explanation that gives a bit of insight into why they may behave this way (I am no expert and may not agree that it is normal but I think there is something to learn there).
What I will not forget from what both her my friend said is that once self harmers get counseling the behavior would stop. Poster number one also gave that example of her college mate.
I think her family should maybe try to get her into counseling and see if it works for her. Its cant be normal behavior at all. But I dont think we can beat the experts who deal with so many cases. We may be passing and dealing with many self harmers without knowing it each day.
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That cant be good. She is 29 yrs old...Not a teenager. Poster number three gave what I consider a good explanation that gives a bit of insight into why they may behave this way (I am no expert and may not agree that it is normal but I think there is something to learn there).
What I will not forget from what both her my friend said is that once self harmers get counseling the behavior would stop. Poster number one also gave that example of her college mate.
I think her family should maybe try to get her into counseling and see if it works for her. Its cant be normal behavior at all. But I dont think we can beat the experts who deal with so many cases. We may be passing and dealing with many self harmers without knowing it each day.