Are Parents Too Soft On Their Kids?

Well my kid walked to school and back and took the bus out of necessity, but considering the world we live in, and if possible, why not give your kid a ride? I do not see anything wrong with that. On the rest I agree with you. But finally to each their own, parents do end up paying for overindulging their kids, sometimes they pay and pay.

Very much so. If anything, children have it too easy. It's all this stupid MTV "all about me" culture and movement against spanking that are turning kids into idiots. Parents would rather bribe their kids to do what they want than force them to do it through punishment. Kids these days are rude, loud, annoying, little punks with no respect for anyone. This world today tricks kids into thinking they have it tough because they have to listen to their parents and go to school. School isn't tough, niether is listening to your parents. School is always taught on the level of the slowest kid in class. School isn't tough anymore. That's why we have so many kids "diagnosed" with ADD/ADHD. School is boring and they act out. Kids don't have it tough. People in third world countries that are lucky to find a meal once every few days have it tough. Allowing your child to go through the drive thru at McDonald's in their brand new car, while talking on their brand new cell phone while wearing sneakers that cost more than my first car is not tough. It's spoiled. If I even yelled or spoke in a tone that my dad or mom didn't like they'd take my head off and wouldn't even think twice about it. If I intentionally broke something because I was mad or lost my temper and yelled, they would of course give me a beating, and take away TV, games, and ground me in my room for a month at the least. Now, because of all these "parenting experts" that say yelling or punishing your child damages their egos, we've got kids murdering kids over basketball games and parents who are utterly clueless how to stop their maniac tyrant kids from burning down the house when dinner is late or dinner isn't want they wanted. No wonder we're raising a generation of complete wimps.

Qwll to answer you question yes kids gace ut to east these days , i have you all topped as a "mean mommy" LOL 1 they have ride the bus to school , then do their home work are they get a snack while am making dinner but thye are eating that snack while soing home work, then horror ofall horrors they have me or the dad check ther home work b4 dinner then eat and yea you eat what i cook or dont LOL, then when dinner is done they have to do CHORES:O clear the table , , do the nightly check of animal food and water and dishes without a dishwasher :O and then make sure thei room is kept up before they shower for the night and then ved m up noticed tha i didnt mention video games well that cause they are INLY alloed to p;ay them on the weekends IF thye have done well in school we as a family do not accect any grade below an 80 , no i dont scean=,m @ gen if thye get a lower grade I just ask what are they ggoing to do about ut abd e are here to help if thye need it , thye dont complain muvh cause thye know what epected of them , plus we chose even befoe we had kids ther they woukd not get no more than 5 gifts at christmas and they know 1 will be clothing so when they ake their lost for santa we know rget REALLY want those things ;) yea im meann mim but its my job to make sure they can survive in this world when they move out and yea the boys share a room as do the girls , I have been told that it was cruel to make them do that but hey thye are gonna have to learn to del with people they dont get along with at times sooner or later ;) ~M~

As years pass by, we should also change accordingly. Nowadays, children learn things faster. They need freedom, love, care. It can be given to them by no one else other than us. If we are rude with our children they will be rude with the people they meet because the first lessons that they learn are from their house. As the child gets matured he realizes himself what is right and what is wrong. Why should we compel him before that to make him feel what we think is right should be his right.

I know what you mean. I see a lot of it. I have 4...3 of whom are grown and are good people. I admit that I do cater to my little 15 yr old.....spoil her some would say. I give her rides when she could walk....I'll run for her. I'm ok with that...she is a great kid and gives me very little problems. She is respectful and does well in school and sports. She helps me around the house without being told. If, however, she started acting out....the foot would come down. She is the youngest and I think she knows this. She is a lot younger than her siblings and she witnessed a lot. I have no tolerance for disrespect. I did have one daughter that got into trouble and things. I don't have a problem with the tough love.

Hello, I will have to say when dealing with children, your own or someone elses, you have to take the middle course with them, don't be to nice and don't be to stern, just stay right in between. Now lets take a look at why not be so soft with children, well lets be real here children will only go as far as you would let them go, for exsample if you or someone elses child started to kichk you, and did nothing but moved your leg away from them so that they don't kick you again, chances are all they going to do is kick you again, and maybe this time they kick you even harder, because now they just lost all respect for you, even if they had just a little bit of it left for you, they have lost it all, because now they look at you as a push over. So what you should do in that situation is , address them ask them why did they kick you in the first place, to find out what the problem really is,then you should issue some kind of punishment such as sending them to their room, giving them a time out, taking something away from them that they truley love, to show them that this is not how you deal with whatever, they may be going through. Happy My Lotting!

Yes, you are right upto an extent. In comparison to older generation, parents are getting more lenient towards their kids and they keep fulfilling the realistic and unrealistic demands of their kids. Family plannint is being adopted in some of the families, and the number of kids have come down to one or two only, that is why parents pay more attention towards their kids and agree to their demands. They should be stern sometimes and the kids be told the reality and they should tell their kids that we cannot go beyond a limit to fulfill your demands. Let the kids cry for a while, they will understand their parents. However, till they are realised about the facts, they will not understand and this could be harmful in the long run.

I agree with you that today's parents are way too lenient with their children. We need to understand that setting rules is the best way to show them that we love them and want them to grow to be successful adults.

Hi friends, I was raised in a time when a parent could actually be a parent and not have the government up their butts. My parents were good to me, but when I needed discipline, I deserved it. It could have been grounding, it could have been a good swat in the behind. Unfortunately, nowadays the government is really tying our hands (and the children know it). This has never affected me however. I raise my children the way my parents raised me. I have the most respect for my elders. I have always had good manners. I am not perfect, but I am good person because I was raised properly. And I am proud to say, I have three wonderful little adults, well one is still a teenager (ugh). I am very proud of my kids and always will be. At the same time, my kids have always been able to talk to me about anything. I think that has been the greatest thing. I think just trying your best is all you can do and other people should just mind their own business and the government should too. Sincerely, Cheryl

It is very tough on parents these days when it comes to raising children. Their authority is challenged. Now we expect children to challenge the parents, and it used to be that the parents would quickly let the child know just who was in charge. This is made much more difficult today. The reason? The Village is trying to raise your child. Years ago, a child having a temper tantrum in a store would get a smack from a mother and it would be over. No mother could do that today. Even a slight tap on the bum would shock and horrify onlookers and they would on their cellphones to 911 in a heartbeat. What is the current wisdom? Take the child out of the store and go home. I guess that means that the mother who is grocery shopping must leave her full cart of food and take the child home. Who does this punish? It punishes the mother who can't do her shopping. So what happens instead? Mom tries to find ways to placate the child so she can finish her shopping trip. This may be buying them a toy or some sweet. The child now controls this situation entirely. Taking away the rights of parents to discipline their children has led to the children being in control. Children learn in school that if their parents do anything they don't like, they can call the police and report them for it. Children should not be abused or beaten, so it is important to have agencies that look out for their welfare. But when parents are afraid to discipline for fear that these same agencies will move against them, it paralyzes the ability of the parents to raise their children to be civilized adults who understand rules and acceptable behavior. The real problems lie in the future, when this generation of children are in charge of the world. There is something very dangerous about an adult who still doesn't understand the word "No".

I agree. Most seem to soft to discipline their own children. And if they won't do it, exactly who is supposed to. The minute they took the strap out of the schools, that's when it began. Then parents started getting charged with child abuse just for disciplining their children, so now most parents are afraid to spank their children for fear of jail time. I'm disgusted with it myself. I never stopped disciplining my children. My youngest turned out just fine, because she saw her older sister get into trouble, and she didn't want to get in trouble, so she behaved. The oldest only crossed me because her father's parents let her away with everything, gave her everything her heart desired, until she became a certain age, where she could reason, then they just dropped her like a hot potatoe. Because she was terribly willful and VERY difficult to deal with. All because of them, of course. She grew up hating me because I had rules and I stuck to them. I would not budge. So, she moved out at 15, was pregnant by the time she was 17, and suckered the boy into marrying her. Now, 6 yrs later, she is tired of him, so she just kicked him out, and went on welfare. AS IF? They have twins for crying out loud and she got pregnant on purpose to tie him to her, so he would 'take care of her'.

I agree with you. Having a children is a big responsibility. Molding their mind to the right path is not easy. But it's the parents task or duty to make it happen. That means discipline is very much needed. Only we should not be much so strict on them or else they will rebel againts the parents.

I think it's every parent's decision to choose what their kids can and can't do. The problem I have with parents is that they never follow through. Too many times I am in a restaurant and a parent say the next time you do that I'm going to do this...And then the next time they do that they DON'T do this. If you aren't firm and follow through then that sends a message to your kids that they can walk all over you. When that child is 16 and you're ripping your hair out trying to figure out what went wrong please refer to this discussion. Parents just really need to follow through. I think things like make up and such are trivial arguments. Parents need to prepare their children for the real world. And in the real world no one is going to care what age you were when you started wearing make up.

I believe that children should learn respect first and most of all. The respect for others and respect for them selves. You are right it is a parents job to teach children how to behave but some were along the line this is being lost. Too many children do not respect others or them selves. A child is all about learning. What they see is what they learn, what they hear is what they learn. Something else I have noticed is, what ever happend to getting married then having children? Now a days its having children first before marriage or never getting married and having children. The family unit is being lost! Maybe I am just old fashioned but being old fashioned is not a bad thing it is a good thing in my eyes. Someone has to be the old fashioned one might as well be me!

Well I'm not present, but I remember what it was like being a kid and I wasn't allowed to do half of the things that I see kids get away with today, like cursing and screaming at there parents, and sneaking out being loud in public acting out in the supermarket and other extreme bad behaviors, and when I see kids and teens act like that I sometimes cant believe it, becuse though my parents aren't perfect they taught me respect for myself and my parents also my elders, for example if my mother told me it was time for bed I would go to bad with no crying or argument, if my parents took me to the supermarket and said that I could not get something I would understand and do as I was told, I would not fall on the ground, and act out, I'm not saying I was the perfect child, but I did as I was told, until I was an adult, and it seems that kids today dont respect there parents, and so I do think that some parents are a bit to soft with there kids, dont get me wrong I respect all parents becuse I know it can be difficult raising kids, but I think if some parents gave there kids a little more discipline that maybe they would be more respectful.

I could not agree with you more. My children will not date till they are 17 years old and then it will be a GROUP date sort of thing, there is no reason for a 16 year old boy to show up at my house and take my daughter in the car alone and I for one am not going to let it happen. My kids have chores, they have rules, they have things that I expect of them. Makeup. again she will be 16 prior to wearing any, If they want a car, they work for it, as in get a job, I had to, my husband had to I will not cater to them. I do not want spoiled brats.

now is a new era and we can't just denied that,what happen in the past is not relevant anymore in that time.so what happen in our childreenhood,cwe can't do that again right now,what our parent did in the past it cuoldn't we do to our child now.

If I talked back to my parents when I was growing up, my dad would get the belt out. I learned respect. Times have definitely changed from the "Leave It To Beaver" days. I have a hard time understanding how parents can let their daughters wear hardly anything with their middle showing. There isn't much in the way of modesty anymore. You'd think that society would get better through the years, not worse.