Too much Help is Bad! Why?
By neelianoscet
@neelianoscet (9615)
Philippines
June 16, 2009 11:45pm CST
I had a brother who have a girlfriend and last week her mom is in the hospital. the reason is that her mother got pneumonia with an asthma. The girl live in another state and I doubt if she telling the truth. My brother works in another country and because he is concern. He send money without prior evidence that it is true. Then, after two days. My brother girlfriend told him that her mother is in Intensive care unit but release after 2 days. I think that is unbelievable. If her mother is in terrible cases 2 days is not enough to be release in a hospital. I really doubts her credibility as she is taking advantage of the kindness offer by my brother. If I were you, will you also think the same things? I think too much kindness sometimes is terrible, especially of helping your family, all your earning from your work goes to another family. I do not like to appear like shrewd but I am concern about my brother. She trusted this girl too much that he don't care anymore what others have to say about his actions.
6 responses
@kabudel (175)
• Philippines
26 Jun 09
Hi Neelia, you know, it might also be true...
My grandfather went into ICU early this year only for two days; Telemetry unit that is... It might be that the girlfriend's mom went into the ICU Telemetry -- it's still a part of ICU wherein patients who are in need of critical diagnosing stay; or those ones who come from the actual Intensive Care do recover. ICU Telemetry provide a close watch among the patients.
just my 2 cents. =)
1 person likes this
@neelianoscet (9615)
• Philippines
2 Jul 09
I have not seen her and only receive the information from my brother. But, he cannot attest the truth behind it. For he is far and working out of the country. He believes whatever her girlfriend told her. Anyway, if that is the case. I won't mind him helping her if it is true. It is one way of saving another precious life who were in troubles financially. But, if it is a lie. Well, let it be. Her conscience will be her enemy.
@neelianoscet (9615)
• Philippines
8 Jul 09
I believe in karma and i hate real lying. White lies helps to avid offending a person. I am not against helping it it is only in moderate amount and their still something left in my pocket. If I will become rich. I will help as long a s I live. It is a wonderful feelings and even if the person would not be able to pay me. I will still be glad to help and not stopping by.
@Sreepu_d2009 (254)
• India
4 Jul 09
well..i think wat u thot is true..u r rite to b concerned abt ur own brother...bt u cn't dismiss d fact dat he surely has some responsibility to his gf..if indeed he is truly in love.Does bcoz of these payments ur brother cn't help ur family..i.e his own family...??If yes,den probably bcoz of these situation ur being too much concerned.Mayb d gal is not telling d entire truth...bt it depends upon ur brother entirely wat he should do his earnings..to help her or not...as its completely his personal business.U can only warn him..probably try to talk with the gal's mother over ph...or if possible visit her.Is would b better of u not to try too much to convince ur brother abt d girl's dishonesty as den u will endanger ur own relation with ur brother.
1 person likes this
@neelianoscet (9615)
• Philippines
8 Jul 09
I am really very concern with the welfare of my family. My brother sacrifice a lot and it is not really good he could not send help to his family. He mention will just be patience as he is over debt and even borrow money from his friends. Although, he is very close to the family. I think it is not right to give his full income and live him penniless? I am not against helping and any amount will do. what important is able to help at your own risk.
@polachicago (18716)
• United States
26 Jun 09
Those days hospital is not keeping patients for longer that they have to.
My best friend went home two days after placed pacemaker...
I was shocked...
As far as that girl, maybe she is saying the truth....only eye witness know for sure, but I would believe her...
1 person likes this
@neelianoscet (9615)
• Philippines
2 Jul 09
I do not want to speculate that is a lies or the truth. My brother and myself cannot go their as it is far away. Anyway, if the girl is really telling the truth. I won't mind and will also pray for her mom recovery. But, she's not telling the truth and all she says is a mere hearsay. Well, it will be her conscience to decides to make her realize what she did is wrong. making a stories and worsening the tales of her mom confinement to ask for money. Is a sure alibi and will not tolerate it.
@berrys (864)
• Singapore
29 Jun 09
oh wow. maybe you should ask the girlfriend whether you could have a friendly visit with her mother after all she is dating your brother. well first off you can't call her a liar and you can't say that she's telling the truth cause you don't have any evidence supporting either one of the statements. do you honestly think a girl who loves your brother would take his money if she was lying and was not in desperate need?
how long have they been dating before this incident happened? if she really loved him she wouldn't be taking advantage of him. check out the situation first. if she has been his girlfriend for 2 years or some thing i would say its safe to actually believe her. is she going to pay your brother back? cause im sure she will feel awful taking his money without repaying him for all the kindness he has showered upon her. so just take a step back and analyze the situation first alright? good luck i hope everything works out fine for you. cheers.
1 person likes this
@neelianoscet (9615)
• Philippines
2 Jul 09
Well, they both meet during my brother review held in their places. They become sweetheart after a year. But, i could say is, that they really don't deeply know each other, because they both live in different places. It often takes a year before they meet again. My brother work hard with all his might in helping my family. And, he mention he cannot send money as he help her girlfriend mom. But for how long?, aside from the hospitalization and medicine maintenance.They are not yet married and he have too much obligation. It is alright to help but if he will pay all the expenses and nothing left in his pocket,it will be worse. It is alright to help in moderate amount but not in excessive. When my niece call her girl mention she is in manila doing affiliate. If her mom is really critical she should cancel her activities to take care of her. However, if the girl is telling the truth. It is alright and my bro help save another life. But, if all of these are lies. definitely, my brother kindnesses is abuse. Its her conscience who will bother her anyway.
@berrys (864)
• Singapore
23 Jun 09
I do not know the whole story or whether or not this 'girlfriend' is telling the truth however If i were you I'd be suspicious as well. I mean it is good and kind of your brother to help this woman, but if he is just sending his cash blindly then he could be scammed. There's no saying that he is being scam, but he could be, I think your brother might be a little naive and too trusting of certain people, then again maybe his known this girl for a long time and she would not lie to him. All in all I think an investigation on your part or your brothers part should be done, maybe ask your brother to pop-over down there to see how she and (bring some flowers) for her 'mother' whose 'sick' therefore he wouldn't look like his snooping if she is actually sick. Good luck! and i hope for your brothers sake that her story is legitimate.
@neelianoscet (9615)
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
I think she is telling only half truth to my brother. She tell him that her mom is in the hospital. When in fact, I call my friend who live near their place to ask their neighbor if it is true that her mother is hospitalized. The neighbor mention that is a case of asthma and not pneumonia. Within two days her mom is back to their home. I think my brother girlfriend is a liar. She told my brother her mom is in ICU but 2days after saying that her mom is release. Within the short time? That is unbelievable if in ICU it should take it longer, I think. The problem with me, I could not go their personally as the place is in another province. I rely on my friend testimony. Well, my brother could not go their as he is working out of the country. Somehow, I doubt really the honesty of her girlfriend. For now, I'll ask my brother to ask her again. But, if he seem do not care. Well, I just leave it to him. Anyway, its his money after all..
@jules67 (2788)
• Philippines
19 Jun 09
Hi!!!
What made you say that his girlfriend is not telling the truth? Have you seen right with your own two eyes that her mother is really well? Why am I saying this? It is because we can not just say things against the person if we do not have concrete evidence. But then, do not ignore your gut feelings.
If you were indeed right, then, it is your duty as his sister to tell him in a nice way that he might be overdoing it. Ones help could only be as much. Even if she were his girlfriend, he should not allow them to take advantage of his kindness. I guess being a sister, you are just concerned for his well-being.
1 person likes this
@neelianoscet (9615)
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
My brother girlfriend live in another place, just like in another state or province. I try to connect with a friend to confirm the situation. To better find out if it is true, I like to see it with my two eyes. But, it is costly to travel and I am not a FBI to do that. My friend told me that the mother is the hospital for two days but not in Intensive care Unit. Somehow, their is half truth and half lies. The cost o confinement as my brother girlfriend mention is 57,000 in pesos as it is in ICU for two days. Something that is unbelievable. I think if a person is in ICU it will take her a weeks before being release. Her stories is something not credible. Isn't it?
